Aiona's Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 54 "Love Forever"Because my portfolio is too messy and I have OCD.
5 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
This poem is short and succinct. It reminds us of the power and surprise of the gift of love. It shows the joy and sorrow in love. It gives us hope that love can happen at any time and more than once.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing
dp
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2019
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This poem is short and succinct. It reminds us of the power and surprise of the gift of love. It shows the joy and sorrow in love. It gives us hope that love can happen at any time and more than once.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contest.
Keep writing
dp
Comment Written 27-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2019
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Thanks, dragonpoet. Love came again for me, and I see it happen to others. I sure hope that it happens for my friend.
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My pleasure. I used the wrong word. I should have used readers instead of us. I have been married for 33 years.
~dp
Comment from susand3022
Hi Aiona, Omg... a poet too? I'm toast! This is really beautiful, you should do wonderfully well in the contest, if you don't win I'll be surprised. It's completely true... it always happens when you're not looking for it. I met my ex-husband when I had said to myself, that's it... no more... I'm done! Next thing you know... BAM! There he was. Then, this time too, I was done, finished, that was it! Then there he was... POW! Don't worry... it's going to hit her sometime too... when she least expects it probably. She's lucky to have a friend like you. :)
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Hi Aiona, Omg... a poet too? I'm toast! This is really beautiful, you should do wonderfully well in the contest, if you don't win I'll be surprised. It's completely true... it always happens when you're not looking for it. I met my ex-husband when I had said to myself, that's it... no more... I'm done! Next thing you know... BAM! There he was. Then, this time too, I was done, finished, that was it! Then there he was... POW! Don't worry... it's going to hit her sometime too... when she least expects it probably. She's lucky to have a friend like you. :)
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Thanks, I know it will too. Happen for her, that is.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
A perfectly done triolet with the repeated lines structured to have a good impact on the reader. It tells us life is very unpredictable. I like the way you chose to portray the death, making us ask why
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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A perfectly done triolet with the repeated lines structured to have a good impact on the reader. It tells us life is very unpredictable. I like the way you chose to portray the death, making us ask why
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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I don't really know the cause, but it was so hush. There's such a stigma against depression, so I can only imagine.
Regardless, he was so young. And she loved him so much. I couldn't help thinking, how cruel. But she is strong. I know she will find love again. Her heart is so big.
Comment from secondthought
being a person of faith these words forced me to hug the emotion. don't understand the theory when it come lines but, know this poem is worth repeating in churches all over the world. Love the repeating the I Learned line. If one writes in this style it will bring so much joy in the middle of tragedy for so many of us.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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being a person of faith these words forced me to hug the emotion. don't understand the theory when it come lines but, know this poem is worth repeating in churches all over the world. Love the repeating the I Learned line. If one writes in this style it will bring so much joy in the middle of tragedy for so many of us.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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I sure hope so. Thank you for reviewing it. Yeah, the Triolet structure is interesting. In Catholic masses, we do repeat stuff a lot. I wonder if that's kind of where it originated. Or maybe Masses use it because repetition is kind of helpful for meditation. I'm not sure, but yeah, it wasn't til you pointed it out that I realized we do that in Church a lot. Kind of like when that little train kept saying, "I think I can. I think I can."
Comment from lyenochka
Well done triolet which is tricky because of the repeated lines but in your usage of the repetition, it shows me a new context. At first the love that would seem to last forever was lost to death, but another love came along to bring hope and reassurance that this love is forever.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Well done triolet which is tricky because of the repeated lines but in your usage of the repetition, it shows me a new context. At first the love that would seem to last forever was lost to death, but another love came along to bring hope and reassurance that this love is forever.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review. I'm glad that the new context was communicated okay. It's the only reason I can think that the triolet structure is useful!
