What Happened?
Accidents happen.26 total reviews
Comment from QC Poet
Very clever use of the writing prompt.
Not so sure possible in real life, too many pieces to put together. Very entertaining and enjoyable read. Good Luck in the contest.
God's Blessings to you.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Very clever use of the writing prompt.
Not so sure possible in real life, too many pieces to put together. Very entertaining and enjoyable read. Good Luck in the contest.
God's Blessings to you.
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for this kind review and the read. It placed third in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you decide.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from Mame
Terrific story here matched with picture- was it a real vase? How amazing to glue it back so well and how unlucky that she purchased the flowers. Well told and good luck with comp.!
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Terrific story here matched with picture- was it a real vase? How amazing to glue it back so well and how unlucky that she purchased the flowers. Well told and good luck with comp.!
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for this kind review and the read. It placed third in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you decide.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from shaffer40
I enjoyed this cute, coincidence "oops" story a great deal. Of course this would be the very day, after the vase sat unused for so long, that she'd walk in with flowers. The ending was great.
If I may, I have a few suggestions.
In the beginning I believe the second sentence, "She won't be home..." should also be in quotes. In the second paragraph you might shorten: "how to assemble the pieces..." In the sentence "It took what seemed like forever," you don't need commas, and you might end with "each other." Next, how about: "It was a puzzle, and he loved puzzles."?
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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I enjoyed this cute, coincidence "oops" story a great deal. Of course this would be the very day, after the vase sat unused for so long, that she'd walk in with flowers. The ending was great.
If I may, I have a few suggestions.
In the beginning I believe the second sentence, "She won't be home..." should also be in quotes. In the second paragraph you might shorten: "how to assemble the pieces..." In the sentence "It took what seemed like forever," you don't need commas, and you might end with "each other." Next, how about: "It was a puzzle, and he loved puzzles."?
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge. I will check on the quote suggestion, thank you.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from Mustang Patty
Dear Anonymous Author,
Thank you for sharing your short piece for the 'What happened?' prompt.
Within the context of your story, you gave us a good, middle, and end. The hook and the photo you chose was a great choice.
Good luck to you in the contest,
~Mustang Patty~
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Dear Anonymous Author,
Thank you for sharing your short piece for the 'What happened?' prompt.
Within the context of your story, you gave us a good, middle, and end. The hook and the photo you chose was a great choice.
Good luck to you in the contest,
~Mustang Patty~
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from LIJ Red
An excellent story based on the prompt and required beginning. I think it could be streamlined somewhat, but I do not rate on content or style, and no spags or logic failures jump out...good luck
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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An excellent story based on the prompt and required beginning. I think it could be streamlined somewhat, but I do not rate on content or style, and no spags or logic failures jump out...good luck
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from jenintorre
I enjoyed reading your flash fi cton. This is my favourite type of writing. It had a good punch line which is most important. I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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I enjoyed reading your flash fi cton. This is my favourite type of writing. It had a good punch line which is most important. I wish you lots of luck in the competition. Best wishes. Jen.
Comment Written 19-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from Dawn Munro
I think everyone has tried to hide something like this at one time or another -- this was a fun idea.
I would suggest that you leave space between paragraphs to encourage the read though.
One nit:
"He wiped the worry sweat (off) his..."
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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I think everyone has tried to hide something like this at one time or another -- this was a fun idea.
I would suggest that you leave space between paragraphs to encourage the read though.
One nit:
"He wiped the worry sweat (off) his..."
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge. I made the correction, thank you so much, typo.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
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Very welcome.
Comment from LisaMay
This is very cleverly written and I enjoyed it . A nice circuitous plot. It sounded like he was going to get away with it but life isn't like that, we usually get found out. Maybe he should have bought her flowers himself to put in the vase so she didn't have to do it herself.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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This is very cleverly written and I enjoyed it . A nice circuitous plot. It sounded like he was going to get away with it but life isn't like that, we usually get found out. Maybe he should have bought her flowers himself to put in the vase so she didn't have to do it herself.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from 24chas
This was an enjoyable read, unknown author. I wasn't sure where this was going until the end. I liked the flow and the pacing of the piece. Nice job and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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This was an enjoyable read, unknown author. I wasn't sure where this was going until the end. I liked the flow and the pacing of the piece. Nice job and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed your contest entry, Mystery Author. Good job with the prompt. Your lines flow well and the story is feasible. I like the picture you paired with it. Just when one thinks something won't happen--it will, right?
Good job and thanks for sharing. Best wishes. Jan
shagrin--->chagrin
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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I enjoyed your contest entry, Mystery Author. Good job with the prompt. Your lines flow well and the story is feasible. I like the picture you paired with it. Just when one thinks something won't happen--it will, right?
Good job and thanks for sharing. Best wishes. Jan
shagrin--->chagrin
Comment Written 18-Feb-2019
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2019
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Thank you for reading and the complimentary review. It took third place in the contest to my surprise. The ending is up in the air, you be the judge. I did correct that, thank you so much.
Many blessings,
Brigitte
