Where the Antelope Play
I'm forced to document a very special place - in 695 words.7 total reviews
Comment from LisaMay
Life is all about "give it a chance kid, you'll like it here." In this story you have used the antelope welcome as a lovely image in a beautifully told story that I found very engaging and emotionally moving, being able to clearly picture the scene and feeling like I was there watching the animals too.
I read this story to get a better picture of you as a person because I have liked some of your other writings.
reply by the author on 02-May-2019
  |
Life is all about "give it a chance kid, you'll like it here." In this story you have used the antelope welcome as a lovely image in a beautifully told story that I found very engaging and emotionally moving, being able to clearly picture the scene and feeling like I was there watching the animals too.
I read this story to get a better picture of you as a person because I have liked some of your other writings.
Comment Written 02-May-2019
reply by the author on 02-May-2019
-
With this one, you brought tears to my eyes! Partly because of the 6 star rating and your professed enjoyment of my work, and partly because you brought back great old memories to an old man. Life has certain moments which are most unique and special and that prompt gave me recollection and opportunity to write one down and share it. That you liked it put the cherry on top! God Bless!
-
Yeah, I've heard that old geezers cry more easily!! (I do it myself)
That is the gift of being able to express yourself through writing, to recapture those memories so clearly that they come alive for you again.
-
You honor me so, may I suggest that you read "Teach Me Love Of Life" and "Corporate Wing-tips and Me". Those are the best I have ever written. Don't need your review or stars or praise, but if you like my work, these are my best. Enjoy, close your eyes and visit those places with me. Thanks.
-
I read and reviewed Teach me Love of Life back when you posted it in March. I love how your travelling brought you an enjoyment of music, foods, drinks, art and more.
Corporate Wing Tips is a great story; a deserving contest winner.
Comment from pome lover
That is a wonderful story, well told. Your feelings, especially, came across true and honest, and your descriptions brought pictures to mind for the reader.
Also your telling of the important things in life and your discovery of them was heartwarming.
Good job - 6 stars.
Katharine - pome lover
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
|
That is a wonderful story, well told. Your feelings, especially, came across true and honest, and your descriptions brought pictures to mind for the reader.
Also your telling of the important things in life and your discovery of them was heartwarming.
Good job - 6 stars.
Katharine - pome lover
Comment Written 01-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We all encounter moments which bring back memories which have been long-since covered with real life - in my case, 51 years! But the contest opened the door and the memory poured out. At least, that's my excuse. My wife of 41 years claims it just proves again that I am an old man who bores people with the few things he can remember. Thanks for your heart-warming review! God Bless and Happy New Year!
-
thank you and Happy New Year to you and yours,
Katharine - pome lover
Comment from tempeste
Hello mystery writer, I gave you your first of many I hope votes .
You did such a great job in not only catching the reader 's interest but making him/ her literally part of this anazing life experience.
You told your story from the heart and it touched me emotionally , it was as if I had been there too that day as the sun was going down and the antelopes suddenly appeared and started grazing , then playing , running , then grazing again.
I actually read it three times because I loved it.
Thanks for sharing this extraordinary moment in your life .
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
|
Hello mystery writer, I gave you your first of many I hope votes .
You did such a great job in not only catching the reader 's interest but making him/ her literally part of this anazing life experience.
You told your story from the heart and it touched me emotionally , it was as if I had been there too that day as the sun was going down and the antelopes suddenly appeared and started grazing , then playing , running , then grazing again.
I actually read it three times because I loved it.
Thanks for sharing this extraordinary moment in your life .
Comment Written 01-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We all encounter moments which bring back memories which have been long-since covered with real life - in my case, 51 years! But the contest opened the door and the memory poured out. At least, that's my excuse. My wife of 41 years claims it just proves again that I am an old man who bores people with the few things he can remember. Thanks for your heart-warming review! God Bless and Happy New Year!
Comment from RodG
This story really resonates with me although I have never seen an antelope in the wild. You PUT US THERE at that rig when he pulleys himself up to the rail to watch that herd. It's easy to understand how that scene lives in his memory years afterwards. Skillfully done.
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
 |
This story really resonates with me although I have never seen an antelope in the wild. You PUT US THERE at that rig when he pulleys himself up to the rail to watch that herd. It's easy to understand how that scene lives in his memory years afterwards. Skillfully done.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We all encounter moments which bring back memories which have been long-since covered with real life - in my case, 51 years! But the contest opened the door and the memory poured out. At least, that's my excuse. My wife of 41 years claims it just proves again that I am an old man who bores people with the few things he can remember. Thanks for your heart-warming review! God Bless and Happy New Year!
-
This is memorable and earned my vote. Rod
Comment from ajay53
This writer shows a very descriptive style, but uses "and" alot and has many run-on sentences interspersed throughout the piece. He could tighten up the piece by shortening some of those sentences, which would also place more emphasis on what he is trying to convey. Altogether, a good attempt!
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
 |
This writer shows a very descriptive style, but uses "and" alot and has many run-on sentences interspersed throughout the piece. He could tighten up the piece by shortening some of those sentences, which would also place more emphasis on what he is trying to convey. Altogether, a good attempt!
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We who were once salesmen or elected politicians worship at the alter of power words, used in redundancy to drive the point home. Run-on sentences are key to keeping the floor. It usually worked for me, but I am sorry not in your case. Warning: I am too old to change. Happy New Year!
Comment from Thomas Bowling
You use the words 'suddenly' and 'that' repeatedly. You should consider changing this. It's just my thoughts so whatever you choose. You're the creator of your world.
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
|
You use the words 'suddenly' and 'that' repeatedly. You should consider changing this. It's just my thoughts so whatever you choose. You're the creator of your world.
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We who were once salesmen or elected politicians worship at the alter of power words, used in redundancy to drive the point home. Run-on sentences are key to keeping the floor. It usually worked for me, but I am sorry not in your case. Warning: I am too old to change. Happy New Year!
Comment from Rob Caudle
All in under seven hundred words you give us adventure and life lessons You do a great job here. I pondered your use of suddenly for the start of 2 consecutive senteces it seemed like a plan to rev up the anticipation I think it kinda worked but it did bump me out of the story for a bit. Well Done
Rob
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
|
All in under seven hundred words you give us adventure and life lessons You do a great job here. I pondered your use of suddenly for the start of 2 consecutive senteces it seemed like a plan to rev up the anticipation I think it kinda worked but it did bump me out of the story for a bit. Well Done
Rob
Comment Written 28-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
-
We all encounter moments which bring back memories which have been long-since covered with real life - in my case, 51 years! But the contest opened the door and the memory poured out. At least, that's my excuse. My wife of 41 years claims it just proves again that I am an old man who bores people with the few things he can remember. Thanks for your heart-warming review! I used suddenly thrice to dramatized the moment. Old salesmen carry redundancy of power words near the top of their tool kit. I'm too old to change... God Bless and Happy New Year!
