Sad Winter in the South
A '5-7-5 Winter' Contest Entry10 total reviews
Comment from Mark D. R.
This is as close to a Haiku you can get with your satori-like last line.
Jack's 'frozen tears' is a great image.
BTW .... As I see your verse on my iPad, your last line is a smaller type size than the first two - intended or not? If yes, then mention in your author's notes.
Good luck in your entry.
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2018
  |
This is as close to a Haiku you can get with your satori-like last line.
Jack's 'frozen tears' is a great image.
BTW .... As I see your verse on my iPad, your last line is a smaller type size than the first two - intended or not? If yes, then mention in your author's notes.
Good luck in your entry.
Comment Written 25-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2018
-
Thank you for the review today, Mark. :) BTW .... artistic imagery with text placement or other augmentation is never noted in the author notes as it does not change meaning, only presentation. Thank you for your good luck wishes.
Comment from Miss Sherry
Brrrrrrr - such tears! The artwork sent me for an extra sweater. And, oh, the noise they make when the thaw is just enough to loosen things. Very nice poem which now sends me for some hot chocolate.
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2018
|
Brrrrrrr - such tears! The artwork sent me for an extra sweater. And, oh, the noise they make when the thaw is just enough to loosen things. Very nice poem which now sends me for some hot chocolate.
Comment Written 25-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 26-Dec-2018
-
Thank you for your review -- have a wonderful Holiday Season and Happy New Year! :)
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Well-done 5-7-5 that uses each syllable effectively to describe that
Southern scene. We go from warm to below freezing back to warm--
all in less than a week. Awe-inspiring winter scenes must be gazed upon
quickly!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
Well-done 5-7-5 that uses each syllable effectively to describe that
Southern scene. We go from warm to below freezing back to warm--
all in less than a week. Awe-inspiring winter scenes must be gazed upon
quickly!
Comment Written 24-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx so much for dropping by, Janice -- always so good to hear from you!! ;) Merry Christmas! :)
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
You gave me a chill with this sad write of Jack Fost's tears! And I sholdn't Feel sorry for him as he chills me to the bone! Good Luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
You gave me a chill with this sad write of Jack Fost's tears! And I sholdn't Feel sorry for him as he chills me to the bone! Good Luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 24-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx so much for dropping by, Dolly -- always so good to hear from you!! ;) Merry Christmas! :)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written 5-7-5 winter poem. When winter comes to the south we seldom see snow but the rain can freeze in an instant when mr Frost blow his breath over the land.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
A very well-written 5-7-5 winter poem. When winter comes to the south we seldom see snow but the rain can freeze in an instant when mr Frost blow his breath over the land.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.
Comment Written 24-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx so much for dropping by, Sandra -- always so good to hear from you!! ;) Merry Christmas! :)
Comment from donette1914
very beautiful but very cold looking
very creative and its so nice to read your well penned work
i love the artwork as it commitments your work
i hope you do well in the contest and it was a pleasure
donette1914 dec 23 2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
very beautiful but very cold looking
very creative and its so nice to read your well penned work
i love the artwork as it commitments your work
i hope you do well in the contest and it was a pleasure
donette1914 dec 23 2018
Comment Written 24-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx so much for your wonderful comments - Merry Christmas!
Comment from Dean Kuch
Hey, Yvette.
Good 5-7-5 entry you got going here. Or should I have said 'flowing here', instead, heh-heh?
Hope you do well in the contest with this.
Best of luck, and Merry Christmas.
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
Hey, Yvette.
Good 5-7-5 entry you got going here. Or should I have said 'flowing here', instead, heh-heh?
Hope you do well in the contest with this.
Best of luck, and Merry Christmas.
Comment Written 23-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
You so funny, Sir Dean!! :) ;) Thanx so much for dropping by -- always so good to hear from you!! ;) Merry Christmas! :)
-
My pleasure.
Merry Christmas!
Comment from meeshu
great phrasing. so rain and ice is winter in the south. not much fun. I've lived where the 1st snow in Nov. is the last to melt in April. I live now in the land of W.F.T.S. instead of shoveling..
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
great phrasing. so rain and ice is winter in the south. not much fun. I've lived where the 1st snow in Nov. is the last to melt in April. I live now in the land of W.F.T.S. instead of shoveling..
Comment Written 23-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
The place actually shuts down with any semblance of accumulation, dude -- folks simply don't know how to drive in it! :) Blessing to all out there ! ! ;) ;) Take care! ;)
Comment from rspoet
This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem for the winter contest
We get icicles like that on the east coast, too.
They hang off the eaves and slowly melt
Excellent picture to match
Well done
Good luck in the contest
RS
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem for the winter contest
We get icicles like that on the east coast, too.
They hang off the eaves and slowly melt
Excellent picture to match
Well done
Good luck in the contest
RS
Comment Written 23-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx for the review, RS -- Merry Christmas!T
Comment from jmshumate
Nice imagery in your word choices, my only experience in winter down south is many years ago I moved to Little Rock Arkansas for a short spell from Michigan. Not much snow there but a lot of iced over roads! Good job!
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
|
Nice imagery in your word choices, my only experience in winter down south is many years ago I moved to Little Rock Arkansas for a short spell from Michigan. Not much snow there but a lot of iced over roads! Good job!
Comment Written 23-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 24-Dec-2018
-
Thanx for the review, JM - Merry Christmas!