Break of Morning
There's a magic at daybreak...15 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
This 5-7-5, Break of Morning, has the right set up and finds the magic in the transitioning day. The image selected inspires flights of fancy.
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2018
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This 5-7-5, Break of Morning, has the right set up and finds the magic in the transitioning day. The image selected inspires flights of fancy.
Comment Written 11-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2018
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Thanx for the read and review, Bill! :) ;) Have a great one today! :) Yvette :)
Comment from Sherechita
Ooh, that's nice... was my first thought. The picture, poem, font, and formatting all work well together. The poem is light and peaceful. I like the direction that it is taking me. Well done.
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Ooh, that's nice... was my first thought. The picture, poem, font, and formatting all work well together. The poem is light and peaceful. I like the direction that it is taking me. Well done.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, Sherechita -- always appreciated! :) ;) Have a great week and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
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Honestly, I just now realized that you also wrote that lovely spider story! I got caught up writing reviews and did not take the time to see who was writing what... I suppose that makes me a bit more unbiased. Cheers!
Comment from Debbie Pope
Surely I just read the winner. It should win just based on your last line alone. That is such an exquisite image--moonbeams called back home at daybreak.
The more that I read this, the more I adore it. "Shadows magical wings" is also enough to win it by itself. Definitely the winner. You should have entered this one for some real money. It's that good.
My only suggestion has nothing to do with the poem. I would change the descriptive line to "Magic at Daybreak" to make every word poetic.
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Surely I just read the winner. It should win just based on your last line alone. That is such an exquisite image--moonbeams called back home at daybreak.
The more that I read this, the more I adore it. "Shadows magical wings" is also enough to win it by itself. Definitely the winner. You should have entered this one for some real money. It's that good.
My only suggestion has nothing to do with the poem. I would change the descriptive line to "Magic at Daybreak" to make every word poetic.
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Fingers crossed that you are correct! :) ;) Thanx for stopping in, Debbie -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) Purposefully went with the 'harsh mundane' to provide a contrast for the reader....he/she will click on or simply read the title expecting simple or 'regular' when they are, instead, transported into a fantasy morning drama. :) ;) :) :) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
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Yvette, right?
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:)
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Knew it. I recognize your work. That photon poem could be yours, but not good enough for your work.
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I'm gonna tell the author you said that... :) ;)
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No, you are Yvette. She would not tell.
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I tell you this...she heard the moment you wrote it. :) :) ;) :) LOL! :) ;) ;)
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You are getting me worried, and I don't know how to do frowns. ^: How is that?
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That reminds me of the time, years ago, when I first started emailing. I sent what I thought was an anonymous email. Afraid to sign my name, imagine my surprise.
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I figured folks down there in the 'B'ig city would have figured this out....cuz now I'm just toyin' with you....:) Especially now that I'm no longer holding my breath!! ;)) ;) How many nerds do you know of that like to do poetry..? :) ;)
Comment from jack silver
I loved this poem! I loved the all of it... Couldn't decide which of the three lines I liked more. Very well written! So worth the six stars! Good luck in the contest
From
Jack
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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I loved this poem! I loved the all of it... Couldn't decide which of the three lines I liked more. Very well written! So worth the six stars! Good luck in the contest
From
Jack
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Oh, Jack, thank you so very much for this wonderful review and those shining stars -- you have put a smile on my face to last the weekend! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
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No probs
Comment from Liz O'Neill
This has a very nice use of animation and personification. It would make a very sweet brief video with appropriate music in the background. I especially love the last verse. The imagery described here is delightful. I am very struck by this. I hope the reader will join me in my sense of wonder. Well orchestrated. I am definitely voting for this one.
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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This has a very nice use of animation and personification. It would make a very sweet brief video with appropriate music in the background. I especially love the last verse. The imagery described here is delightful. I am very struck by this. I hope the reader will join me in my sense of wonder. Well orchestrated. I am definitely voting for this one.
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Oh, Liz, thank you so very much for this wonderful review and those shining stars -- you have put a smile on my face to last the weekend! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
Comment from Dean Kuch
Very good 5-7-5, Mystery Poet.
I really enjoyed the air of mystery you've created in this.
Syllable count is good, the topic is intriguing.
There's little more that you can do with a 5-7-5 poem such as this.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
~Dean
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Very good 5-7-5, Mystery Poet.
I really enjoyed the air of mystery you've created in this.
Syllable count is good, the topic is intriguing.
There's little more that you can do with a 5-7-5 poem such as this.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
~Dean
Comment Written 10-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 10-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, Dean -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;) :) ;)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written 5-7-5 poem and an excellent photo to illustrate the poem about the first light in the morning when the moonbeams have to give over to the sunbeams to rule for the day.
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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A very well-written 5-7-5 poem and an excellent photo to illustrate the poem about the first light in the morning when the moonbeams have to give over to the sunbeams to rule for the day.
Comment Written 09-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, Sandra -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
Comment from estory
I think you had the perfect balance, the natural image, of haiku, and some great use of alliteration with all those 'm' sounds and 'L' sounds made for some good music. I think you had a strong visual image, the only thing I like to see on top of it in haiku is that epiphany moment that connects the image somehow with the human experience in some way, leading you to think of love, or hope, or lost loved ones or something like that. estory
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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I think you had the perfect balance, the natural image, of haiku, and some great use of alliteration with all those 'm' sounds and 'L' sounds made for some good music. I think you had a strong visual image, the only thing I like to see on top of it in haiku is that epiphany moment that connects the image somehow with the human experience in some way, leading you to think of love, or hope, or lost loved ones or something like that. estory
Comment Written 09-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, estory -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) I'll take your advice under consideration when writing a Haiku for the contest later in the month -- this was just a 5-7-5, though. :) ;) :) Thanx again, and have a great weekend -- be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
Comment from Mark D. R.
Outstanding image accompanies your verse.
You can just feel the mist in that dreamlike, magical lighting. The moonbeams (like 'spreading wings') create such a dramatic background to the trees (shadows of sorts!) in the foreground. It illuminates all!
Thanks again for your great composition of words and image.
Mark
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Outstanding image accompanies your verse.
You can just feel the mist in that dreamlike, magical lighting. The moonbeams (like 'spreading wings') create such a dramatic background to the trees (shadows of sorts!) in the foreground. It illuminates all!
Thanks again for your great composition of words and image.
Mark
Comment Written 09-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, Mark -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)
Comment from country ranch writer
Early daybreak brings the coming of the dawn and the shadows disappear as daybreak comes over the horizon doe all to see as the sun comes up.
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Early daybreak brings the coming of the dawn and the shadows disappear as daybreak comes over the horizon doe all to see as the sun comes up.
Comment Written 08-Nov-2018
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2018
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Thanx for stopping in, Country Ranch -- always appreciate the read and review! :) ;) Have a great weekend and be sure to catch at least one of the sunrises in there!! :) ;)