Worlds
Viewing comments for Chapter 294 "Bear World"Animal poetry and short stories
15 total reviews
Comment from Susanjohn
I don't think that bear is too happy about being on a farm! and clearly he needs some dental work done lol...but if ya can't get some honey out of it..well hey! Well done :-))) Fun little Minute.
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2018
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I don't think that bear is too happy about being on a farm! and clearly he needs some dental work done lol...but if ya can't get some honey out of it..well hey! Well done :-))) Fun little Minute.
Comment Written 05-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Susan
Comment from judiverse
Very clever, and I love the picture of the bear in overalls. I never thought of a bear as being a farm creature. He might put up a fuss about being put into overalls. Your minute form is correct with your four-syllable lines and all of them work well. In your third stanza, you have pretty good meter in your first line. Second stanza, you could easily get the right meter by adding a subject, such as "They'd fit right into overalls." judi
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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Very clever, and I love the picture of the bear in overalls. I never thought of a bear as being a farm creature. He might put up a fuss about being put into overalls. Your minute form is correct with your four-syllable lines and all of them work well. In your third stanza, you have pretty good meter in your first line. Second stanza, you could easily get the right meter by adding a subject, such as "They'd fit right into overalls." judi
Comment Written 04-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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Your suggested line is, unfortunately, eight syllables. Thanks though.
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For a minute poem, you want the first line to be eight syllables. judi
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I misspoke. Too many tankas and 5-7-5s
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Funny! I see how that can happen. I'm forever counting syllables. judi
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is a cute write, I love the picture and the sentiments here, light hearted and a joy to read, I wish you luck with the minute contest Bill, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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This is a cute write, I love the picture and the sentiments here, light hearted and a joy to read, I wish you luck with the minute contest Bill, love Dolly x
Comment Written 04-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Dolly
Comment from Gloria ....
Aw, this is so cute, Bill. The way I figure it the minute poem is perfect for animal wisdom and this is some great animal wisdom.
A fine minute poem and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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Aw, this is so cute, Bill. The way I figure it the minute poem is perfect for animal wisdom and this is some great animal wisdom.
A fine minute poem and I wish you much luck with the Contest Committee. :)
Gloria
Comment Written 04-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Gloria
Comment from BeasPeas
This is a cute little Minute poem. So now we are into bears. I like bears, especially Teddy bears. Good rhyming and form. The image supports your poem. Good luck. Marilyn
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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This is a cute little Minute poem. So now we are into bears. I like bears, especially Teddy bears. Good rhyming and form. The image supports your poem. Good luck. Marilyn
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Marilyn
Comment from lyenochka
A fun minute poem, Bill. Well, if you could harness the strength of bears on a farm, that would be great. I just don't know that they won't eat all the other animals and produce.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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A fun minute poem, Bill. Well, if you could harness the strength of bears on a farm, that would be great. I just don't know that they won't eat all the other animals and produce.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Thanks, lyenochka
Comment from nomi338
Someone should tell Bro Bear that honey makes the waistline swell and eventually you wind up looking like hell.
When you try to hunt down prey, they will always get away.
You'll be gasping for breath, while the who is nearly frightened to death
will skip away living to see another day, and you will go to bed hungry.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Someone should tell Bro Bear that honey makes the waistline swell and eventually you wind up looking like hell.
When you try to hunt down prey, they will always get away.
You'll be gasping for breath, while the who is nearly frightened to death
will skip away living to see another day, and you will go to bed hungry.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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That?s some good poetic advice for bears and folks.
Comment from Earl Corp
Im really digging your Bear World poems. The graphic you used is great? The poem is hilarious and is almost as good as the yogi bear poem. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Im really digging your Bear World poems. The graphic you used is great? The poem is hilarious and is almost as good as the yogi bear poem. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Thanks, Earl
Comment from Y. M. Roger
This is such a wonderful write, Bill -- to have taken that funny little pic and written a lightly-worded, playful minute to add to your bear collection is just brilliant! :) :) And it really is a fun poem...one that would be great with multiple illustrations and maybe an addition stanza or two in the form of a kid's book -- great job!! :) ;) Thanx for sharing and good luck in the contest! :) Yvette :)
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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This is such a wonderful write, Bill -- to have taken that funny little pic and written a lightly-worded, playful minute to add to your bear collection is just brilliant! :) :) And it really is a fun poem...one that would be great with multiple illustrations and maybe an addition stanza or two in the form of a kid's book -- great job!! :) ;) Thanx for sharing and good luck in the contest! :) Yvette :)
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Thank you, Yvette
Comment from l.d.lauritzen
Poetry is something that is different for everyone. I usually write mysteries and westerns. The only time I write poetry is to try and focus myself on the world around me. Your poem is fun and light. Hey-I was a commercial beekeeper for ten years-lets lay off those bees. They have enough problems without more bears. Keep writing.
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Poetry is something that is different for everyone. I usually write mysteries and westerns. The only time I write poetry is to try and focus myself on the world around me. Your poem is fun and light. Hey-I was a commercial beekeeper for ten years-lets lay off those bees. They have enough problems without more bears. Keep writing.
Comment Written 03-Oct-2018
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2018
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Thanks, LD. No bees were harmed in the writing of this minute poem.