Reviews from

Not Sure Yet

Viewing comments for Chapter 20 "Not Invisible"
Free verse poems

21 total reviews 
Comment from LIJ Red
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Do grizzlies scat through the woods? I had not heard of this particular issue, but I know the native Americans got a rotten deal in so many ways...excellent free verse.

 Comment Written 11-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 11-Sep-2018
    They scat IN the woods, you know like does a bear sh__ in the woods? They do! Once I saw a huge pile in northern California, and I thought, that is one big boy. but that's another story :))
    Carol
Comment from Mark Valentine
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I read the article you linked - heartbreaking. As one of the quotes pointed out, it's a loss that doesn't stop.

The line from your poem that really stands out for me is "so nearly safe" - it captures that "if only..." sense of the survivors who replay the tragedy in their minds with different endings.

Each stanza captures a different nuance of the heartbreak and desperate hope that loved ones must feel - the more rational part of one's mind knowing with 99.9% certainty that the loved one is gone, but the bonds of love can't stop searching. And that's the most striking thing about the poem (and the situation it chronicles) - it speaks to both the power of love that ties us to each other - a power that is innate, primal, and transcendent and aligns us with the way things are supposed to be,

The poem is also a testament to the sad fact that things are not the way they are supposed to be. Thanks for shedding some light on this tragic story.


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 11-Sep-2018
    Hi Mark, thanks for reading the article. I've read it over and over, it bothers me that the lives of Native Americans are so very hard, in the beautiful places that we revere. The Blackfeet Nation headquarters is right outside Glacier Park.

    To me, I think that as a race, they are marginalized and there's a history to it that is deep in the culture now - their lands taken by white people, forced onto reservations, their easy addictions to alchohol and drugs...its a brutal history and one that seems to be often taken out on the women.

    Carol
Comment from jenintorre
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is so brilliantly written and so sad. "Almost safe", I found that so poignant. This poem is so distressing but so well written. Best wishes. Jen.

 Comment Written 10-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 10-Sep-2018
    Thank you, Jen. This poem contains much more than the other one you read. I'm just not ready to move on from this. I feel terrible that I had no idea how bad things are for Native women, and Montana is my home state. In fact, I was up in Blackfeet country in June, enjoying the beauty of the area...
    Yes, I felt the same about Olivia Lone Bear, who was found in the lake so close to her home.
    Carol
Comment from Ulla
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Carol, that's tragic. Why is it so? The link didn't work so I'm still in the dark. But I do sense a tragedy lurking here. It's a poignant free verse poem, which try to answer the questions I'm asking. Kind regards. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2018
    The link didn't work? It should, I copied it right from the article. Try this one:
    https://apnews.com/cb6efc4ec93e4e92900ec99ccbcb7e05/NotInvisible:-Why-are-Native-American-women-vanishing?

    I think it's a combination of poverty, drugs, a complete disruption of their way of life, and a separation from the rest of society on the reservations. Some of the reservations are very remote and even when they're not the residents tend to stay there, and the rest of us stay out, or drive through without stopping.

    Thanks for reading and for caring, Ulla,
    Carol
Comment from Just2Write
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A heart-breaking Free Verse. This poem creates an ache of sorrow that sweeps over the reader. Here in my province there was an inquiry into why so many aboriginal women are murdered. I don't know if any answers ever came of it. The women are so vulnerable - and many live in poverty, where abuse is rampant.
I've written on this topic a couple of times. I can't understand how mankind can turn its collective backs on anyone. We had a serial murdered who preyed on women living in the slums of Vancouver. Many of them were indiginous women and prostitutes. Easy pickin's for this creep. He admits to killing at least 50 women. So horrific, and so very, very sad.


 Comment Written 09-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2018
    Oh my god, that is so awful about Vancouver. People do not know this - or they don't care. It makes me very upset! I was just up in East Glacer, Blackfeet country, and had no idea that that gorgeous country is also the scene of so much abuse. Heartbreaking. Thank you for reviewing, and I hope to see more of your work (sorry if I have missed some, I am off and on here).
    Hugs,
    Carol
Comment from Liberty Justice
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

SIX STARS 6******We, women and especially girls, and even young boys and men have to be careful not to walk alone. Children must be taught the dangerous of this world and that strangers are often not our friends and could harm us. Everyone must know tricks criminals and molesters play. WELL WRITTEN. liberty justice

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    You are so right! I refuse to walk alone, especially in strange areas and early or late in the day. These poor women in the reservations are in such a bad situation. thank you so much for this outstanding review, I really appreciate it!!
    Oh, if you could stand it, take a look at The Taste of Freedom - I've got a fair number of points on it :)))

    Thanks again, Liberty,
    Carol
reply by Liberty Justice on 08-Sep-2018
    Ok I will. Take a look at my
    Jogging can be dangerous
    to your life. Liberty justice
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    Thank you :))
Comment from mermaids
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

There is a feeling of sadness in your words. It is awful that so many native American females are missing and murdered each year and justice is not done. Your poem gives a voice to them.

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    Yes, so much sadness related to the terrible living conditions of our Native Americans. Thank you for reading,

    Carol
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I admired your storytelling and the suspense you created. I had no idea that there is an epidemic of girls and women disappearing from tribal lands. The photograph you selected certainly reinforces your theme. Sighs- Joan

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    I did not know this either. I remember growing up, and we would never stop for anything in the reservation when driving up north. They are/were notoriously rough towns - but improving, I thought.
    Carol
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

How sad Carol. The story is heartbreaking. I was not aware of this problem. It is disheartening and sad.
I paid attention to the free verse and the punctuation you used. Well done.:) Nancy

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    Thank you, Nancy, for this review and all the stars. I had no idea about this myself - part of the problem is that people don't know and nothing ends up being done.
    I hope to see more of your free verse! Feel free to ask my opinion if you ever want it :))
    Carol
Comment from BeasPeas
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Carol. Heartbreaking not to know what has happened to a loved one. Your free verse poem is well composed and heartbreaking. It points out a fact I didn't know about native women. It seems most victims are women in any case. Our gender is vulnerable to bad people's exploitation. Marilyn

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2018


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2018
    They have the highest rate of violent attacks and/or murder of any group of women in the United States - so horrifically sad. Life on the reservations is very hard I believe.
    Thanks, Marilyn,
    Carol
reply by BeasPeas on 09-Sep-2018
    Ethnic cultural mores are hard to break out of. I believe this is more prevalent in cultures not "watered down" by intermarriage with other groups. Diversity eventually lessens the severity of customs.