Made in the Shade
A Fluffy Piece of Monorhyme8 total reviews
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written monorhyme poem about the rabbit laying in the shade of the flower garden planning how he will get through the day without humans invading his space.
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2018
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A very well-written monorhyme poem about the rabbit laying in the shade of the flower garden planning how he will get through the day without humans invading his space.
Comment Written 18-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2018
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Thanks for reading and reviewing my fluffy monorhyme!
Comment from kiwijenny
Oh I would love to use this poem for my class when we do the ade family..I am going to bookcase it if that's all right. Cute relaxed bunny. They don't sprawl out like that here in Kentucky...too many crack shots.
Love your tirade
God bless
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Oh I would love to use this poem for my class when we do the ade family..I am going to bookcase it if that's all right. Cute relaxed bunny. They don't sprawl out like that here in Kentucky...too many crack shots.
Love your tirade
God bless
Comment Written 17-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Thank you for your encouraging comments! Glad you enjoyed this piece of fluff!
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This is a fine work, manifestation of monorhyme, so meaningfully composed to express the theme to end your tirade for appreciation; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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This is a fine work, manifestation of monorhyme, so meaningfully composed to express the theme to end your tirade for appreciation; well said, well done. Keep Writing -- DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 17-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Thank you!
Comment from dragonpoet
This seems to be a beautiful spot to rest. I can see the fluffy description fits with both the bunny and the pink flowers. The farm does supply food but it also has the tractor at harvest time. Well written and fun poem from the rabbit's perspective.
Good luck and keep writing.
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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This seems to be a beautiful spot to rest. I can see the fluffy description fits with both the bunny and the pink flowers. The farm does supply food but it also has the tractor at harvest time. Well written and fun poem from the rabbit's perspective.
Good luck and keep writing.
dragonpoet
Comment Written 17-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Thank you for stopping by to read and review this piece of fluff!
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Any time.
dp
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
What a sweet and clever poem about the trials and tribulations of this precious rabbit. It reminded me quite a bit of Peter Rabbit and his friends - don't ask me exactly why - perhaps it was because this bunny is a bit disgruntled with his life and options, as well. *smile*
One small note, if I may?
1.) the following line:
--> 'to patch where vegetables are buffeted'
--> does not have the same end rhyme as the others. 'buffeted' is actually pronounced as = Ë?bÉ?-fÉ?t-ted', rather than 'buffet-aid' - as you may be trying to do?
I imagine the CEC will probably send you a message regarding eligibility -- so before they do, make a revision, perhaps?
Thanks and good luck!
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Dear Mystery Writer,
What a sweet and clever poem about the trials and tribulations of this precious rabbit. It reminded me quite a bit of Peter Rabbit and his friends - don't ask me exactly why - perhaps it was because this bunny is a bit disgruntled with his life and options, as well. *smile*
One small note, if I may?
1.) the following line:
--> 'to patch where vegetables are buffeted'
--> does not have the same end rhyme as the others. 'buffeted' is actually pronounced as = Ë?bÉ?-fÉ?t-ted', rather than 'buffet-aid' - as you may be trying to do?
I imagine the CEC will probably send you a message regarding eligibility -- so before they do, make a revision, perhaps?
Thanks and good luck!
Comment Written 17-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2018
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Hi Robyn:
You were absolutely right - the dreaded CEC did contact me and I did revise the poem. The reason I used the word buffeted was that it was included in RhymeZone as a legitimate word. As a noun buffet (pronounced like bouquet) is a smorgasbord of food. I envisioned a greedy little rabbit hoarding carrots! But then smorgasborded is not a word. I think I fell into the rabbit hole of rappers ! lol Thanks for the tip.
Comment from Henry King
What an excellent piece of writing. This is well done. After "displayed" you have "buffeted." a better rhyme, but nearly synonymous with "displayed," are "arrayed and arranged."
Pesky rabbit. Your words forced me to seek Elmer Fudd. The defender of gardens the whole world wide. Unfortunately, he's chasing your cousin Bugs Bunny.
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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What an excellent piece of writing. This is well done. After "displayed" you have "buffeted." a better rhyme, but nearly synonymous with "displayed," are "arrayed and arranged."
Pesky rabbit. Your words forced me to seek Elmer Fudd. The defender of gardens the whole world wide. Unfortunately, he's chasing your cousin Bugs Bunny.
Comment Written 16-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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So glad you got into the spirit of this mono rhyme about a siwwy wabbit! Elmer would definitely get out his hunting hat and gun post haste! Thanks for the nice review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Adri7enne
It's lovely. I like the idea of all the lines rhyming the same sound. I think you might have to search your repertoire for another word for "betrayed" though. Unless you really pronounce it differently than I do. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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It's lovely. I like the idea of all the lines rhyming the same sound. I think you might have to search your repertoire for another word for "betrayed" though. Unless you really pronounce it differently than I do. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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Thank you for dropping by to review my mono rhyme. Were you referring to the word buffeted? I didn?t use the word betrayed in the poem. We pronounce buffeted boofayed in reference to a buffet meal where we help ourselves - all you can eat, as opposed to being served a portion at a time. Greedy little bunny! lol
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You're right. It was "buffeted" that threw me. I don't know where I got "betrayed". Got distracted there I guess. And yes, you do pronounce it differently.
Comment from Cindy McIntyre
It is no easy task to rhyme every line. Your entertaining and humorous topic lend well to this challenge/contest. Your monorhyme reads smoothly! What a fun entry for the contest. Good luck!
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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It is no easy task to rhyme every line. Your entertaining and humorous topic lend well to this challenge/contest. Your monorhyme reads smoothly! What a fun entry for the contest. Good luck!
Comment Written 16-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 16-Aug-2018
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Thank you for your positive feedback!