Snow Fall
5-7-5 poem on nature4 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
You have created some good metaphors. The personification is very effective. This is done so well it isn't til you think back and realize there wasn't one human mentioned. You have a nice use of onomatopoeia with your words. It is also a good metaphor for us sniggling blankets because we are chilled waiting for warmer days. Well written.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2018
You have created some good metaphors. The personification is very effective. This is done so well it isn't til you think back and realize there wasn't one human mentioned. You have a nice use of onomatopoeia with your words. It is also a good metaphor for us sniggling blankets because we are chilled waiting for warmer days. Well written.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2018
-
Thank you for your insightful and thoughtful comments.
Comment from Bill Schott
This 5-7-5 on nature, Snow Fall, has the right format and gives the personified Earth the luxury of a warm blanket of frozen moisture. Nice.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2018
This 5-7-5 on nature, Snow Fall, has the right format and gives the personified Earth the luxury of a warm blanket of frozen moisture. Nice.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2018
-
Although we may miss the warmth of summer, winter has its charms as well. It is a time for rejuvenation. Thank you for dropping by to read and review.
Comment from MSJVClarke
I really like this poem. It's one of the best 5-7-5 poems I have read. It flows smoothly and the topic is definitely appropriate for the challenge of the contest. It appears you have met all the criteria. Good luck!
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2018
I really like this poem. It's one of the best 5-7-5 poems I have read. It flows smoothly and the topic is definitely appropriate for the challenge of the contest. It appears you have met all the criteria. Good luck!
Comment Written 15-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2018
-
Appreciate very much your insightful comments.
-
You are very welcome!
Comment from Lady Jane
Lovely little haiku you've penned here. The imagery, the pattern, the penning all flowed well and I've no revisions to offer other than with true haiku, the sentences are never capitalized... it would read like this:
chilled by winter's breath
earth snuggles 'neath her blanket
waiting for spring's call
Overall well written poem here. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2018
Lovely little haiku you've penned here. The imagery, the pattern, the penning all flowed well and I've no revisions to offer other than with true haiku, the sentences are never capitalized... it would read like this:
chilled by winter's breath
earth snuggles 'neath her blanket
waiting for spring's call
Overall well written poem here. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 15-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2018
-
Wasn?t sure about tha capitals. I agree. Will revise accordingly. Thanks for your feedback.
-
I guess this isn't an actual HAIKU contest, just one that uses the 5-7-5 structure so you can leave them as is if you'd like or make the change to reflect the haiku format. Either way, beautiful poem.