When Do We Send Him Back?
Upon the birth of my baby brother...13 total reviews
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Delightful--rife with wry humor--brilliantly rendered in POV of your young self--Priceless punchline--I'm sure many disgruntled displaced older sisters have said same! Cheers. LIZ
reply by the author on 30-May-2021
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Delightful--rife with wry humor--brilliantly rendered in POV of your young self--Priceless punchline--I'm sure many disgruntled displaced older sisters have said same! Cheers. LIZ
Comment Written 30-May-2021
reply by the author on 30-May-2021
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I was unaware of my brilliant powers to gaze into the future. HE stayed, became the apple of my Mother's eye... I was pushed to the shadows and never again saw the limelight! He's three years younger than I...but (just ask him) twenty times wealthier and thirty IQ points smarter! Ah, if only they'd listened.... (Postage was so cheap back then!)---Laughing here! Thanks! He wouldn't love this but I DO!---Karenina
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Author,
I stopped by the other day and saw your title -- it immediately inspired me to write my own poem on the topic. (My daughter is 7 days from giving birth to our second grandchild. I definitely see our first one thinking along these lines.)
Please let me know who you are after the contest is over, so I can offer you appropriate credit in my notes on that poem.
I enjoyed. Good luck!
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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Dear Mystery Author,
I stopped by the other day and saw your title -- it immediately inspired me to write my own poem on the topic. (My daughter is 7 days from giving birth to our second grandchild. I definitely see our first one thinking along these lines.)
Please let me know who you are after the contest is over, so I can offer you appropriate credit in my notes on that poem.
I enjoyed. Good luck!
Comment Written 11-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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I read and reviewed your poem...I promise I will reveal myself after the contest. Cheers on your pending blessed second grandchild! Thank you,
Karenina
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Contest voting is over and I am delighted to say I took second place! Mystery writer revealed! It is Karenina! (smile)
Comment from kathleenspalding
Excellent story and excellent writing, mystery writer. Just wanted to say you are correct to capitalize Mom and Dad as you are using the words as nick-names. If you say 'my mom' or 'your dad,' that's when it's lower case.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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Excellent story and excellent writing, mystery writer. Just wanted to say you are correct to capitalize Mom and Dad as you are using the words as nick-names. If you say 'my mom' or 'your dad,' that's when it's lower case.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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Thank you for that information...grammar can befuddle me a bit! Thank you as well for enjoying the story!
Karenina
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Me too! My pleasure :-)
Comment from Nanny 6
This is a fun story...that, I for one, can relate to. The world has changed so much since the 50's, I'm not sure if it's a better idea to include the siblings, or to keep the adult world separate. Either way, the child will take their memories of childhood and share them to the next generation. Good luck in the contest!
Judy
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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This is a fun story...that, I for one, can relate to. The world has changed so much since the 50's, I'm not sure if it's a better idea to include the siblings, or to keep the adult world separate. Either way, the child will take their memories of childhood and share them to the next generation. Good luck in the contest!
Judy
Comment Written 11-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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Thanks! I think it's good to keep adult things to adults...but I rather like the concept of congratulating the first child and perhaps offering a small gift (if not merely some much needed attention) and acknowledging their new role as sibling who is older and smarter and can protect the little one... My story took place 60 years ago...and I still remember feeling displaced. The good news is James and I are very close--best of friends--
Karenina
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a fun accounting of the very real angst felt by the first child feeling displaced by the second. Whenever one of our kids had a birthday, we always gave the other a small present too. The birthday child would get the firstpiece of cale and the other the second. They grew up enjoying each other (for the most part).
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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This is a fun accounting of the very real angst felt by the first child feeling displaced by the second. Whenever one of our kids had a birthday, we always gave the other a small present too. The birthday child would get the firstpiece of cale and the other the second. They grew up enjoying each other (for the most part).
Comment Written 11-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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While my family didn't do that I have seen that practice in other families over the years and it is a lovely way to include the sibling or siblings in a day that wraps the birthday boy or girl in sunshine! I know when someone I know has a new baby I never head to visit without a gift for BOTH the new baby and the sibling(s)--and make sure to congratulate him or her or them on being a big brother or sister! Thanks--
Karenina
PS---My angst didn't last long. My brother James is one of my dearest friends today--some 60 years later!
Comment from Cindy McIntyre
This is sweet and funny. As the baby of the family, I can relate to this from the point-of-view of "James" as my older sister wasn't too pleased with me in the early days, but now we are close. A great response to the writing prompt. :) Good luck.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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This is sweet and funny. As the baby of the family, I can relate to this from the point-of-view of "James" as my older sister wasn't too pleased with me in the early days, but now we are close. A great response to the writing prompt. :) Good luck.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2018
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Thanks for taking the time to review this. I think many first children have a real culture shock when suddenly a second child makes them a sibling and all of the "sunlight" once on only them is not only shared, but in those first days, magnified in deference tot he newest addition. I ended us adoring my brother!
Karenina
Comment from JDRBAR
Beautifully written and so typical of the reactions of a spoiled older child. LOL I was nine when my world started to rock with a new sibling. Ten when another appeared, Twelve with the next and thirteen with the next. ENOUGH ALREADY! All toll I became one of seven. I was never a spoiled child, believe me. LOL
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2018
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Beautifully written and so typical of the reactions of a spoiled older child. LOL I was nine when my world started to rock with a new sibling. Ten when another appeared, Twelve with the next and thirteen with the next. ENOUGH ALREADY! All toll I became one of seven. I was never a spoiled child, believe me. LOL
Comment Written 09-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2018
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HAH! No one can appreciate my feelings more than you I'm thinking! Yes--one brother to steal the limelight and rock my world was quite enough!
Thanks,
Karenina
Comment from Robbie Yates
This is so cute. I mean, the main character definitely has Only Child Syndrome, but I feel for her (or him). You have a very readable writing style, with your sentences flowing nicely.
Also, "Holy cow!" cracked me up!!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2018
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This is so cute. I mean, the main character definitely has Only Child Syndrome, but I feel for her (or him). You have a very readable writing style, with your sentences flowing nicely.
Also, "Holy cow!" cracked me up!!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2018
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HI Robbie. "Holy Cow!" was a phrase my Dad used all the time and when asked he said he picked it up in the Marines during WWII (don't ask what cows had to do with that, but as a kid I accepted his explanation)---anyway, he is long deceased but the phrase has trickled down all the way to my grandkids. I appreciate your kind comments. I still bristle a little when I think of how floored I was when my parents brought my brother home.... Thankfully, now we're best buds! Thanks!
Karenina
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
A very well -written piece. The writing is casual and engaging. it's also a great subject matter and humorous. Should do well in the booths.
GMG
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2018
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Hi there,
A very well -written piece. The writing is casual and engaging. it's also a great subject matter and humorous. Should do well in the booths.
GMG
Comment Written 08-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2018
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While in today's world we'd probably have Dr. Phil and 42 other "specialists" doing ten docu-dramas about how to "introduce a new child/sibling into the home"--back then it really was a "children should be seen and not heard" casually parentally ruled environment. We kiddos of the fifties had to buck up and figure it out! Hence, while it was emotionally jarring, I felt a casual style fit best because (much to my childhood amazement) I wasn't scarred for life and my brother quickly became a wonderful addition even to my five year old mind and heart--and now that we're both in our sixties he's a best friend!
Many Thanks,
Karenina
Comment from humpwhistle
I'm guess a lot of us have similar stories. As the youngest of three, I hear it from my brother and sister all the time. My sister, especially. She thought I stole her spotlight. Truth is, being the youngest has it's drawbacks, too.
One thought: cut back on the CAPS and the exclamation points. Use your words to stress.
Best of luck with the voters. Peace, Lee
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2018
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I'm guess a lot of us have similar stories. As the youngest of three, I hear it from my brother and sister all the time. My sister, especially. She thought I stole her spotlight. Truth is, being the youngest has it's drawbacks, too.
One thought: cut back on the CAPS and the exclamation points. Use your words to stress.
Best of luck with the voters. Peace, Lee
Comment Written 07-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2018
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Hi----Yes, I wondered about that (CAPS!!!!)----I DID cut back (she said as she used all caps, but realistically there should be none -- I am so glad you gave me this feedback. Sometimes I need to be pushed what I know instinctively is right. (Stubborn child I was then and guess I am now in my sixties.....
Thanks,
Karenina
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Truth? When the back of my mind poses a question? I usually give in--stubbornness aside. L
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I am weak and I confess...I did go back to edit out the caps but honestly? My five year old self was pretty much an "all caps" kind kid and removing them felt like I was silencing my real child's voice....so there ya go.... Thanks though, editorially I agree, emotionally I let it ride..... Karenina
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Your piece, Karenina, your rules. Again, best of luck. L
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I am still fighting to overcome my lack of discipline, particularly in prose pieces which are only part of my writing over the past three or four months. Sometimes logic rules...sometimes not! :)
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I break rules all the time. But things like all caps and exclams really stand out. I understand the temptation, but if you nip it in the bud, you'll find you can make up for those crutches by finding stronger words. I don't mean to be dogmatic, Karenina. But the sooner you break bad habits, the sooner your writing will improve. Just trying to help. L
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I do not take offense at all....I appreciate the help!
