Comment from frogbook

Excellent

Good use of dialogue fulfilling the contest prompt. Not always an easy task to accomplish (though I can talk like a mad man-haha.) Best of luck.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018

I thank you for your kind words. As we age I think my husband talks more than me! Now I have to write the Part 2 which will clarify who is talking.

Comment from Mystic Angel 7777

Excellent

This meets the contest requirements well as you deliver a story using dialog only throughout. Will they let you have an entry in parts? I thought the content pretty contemporary as this is how most folks live their lives - busy in their own lives and forgetting all about how fragile and important relationships are especially with God. All the best in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018

I don?t know,, it?s just a learning thing for me. More oeople seem to be prose attracted. than poetry.l I don?t usually do well in contests anyway LOL, thanks so much for reviewing.
Hugs, Trisha

Comment from Heather Knight

Excellent

This is an interesting conversation. I hope you decide to continue, after all it says it's part one and now I'm intrigued.
Very natural dialogue.
Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018

---

reply by the author on 04-Jan-2018

Thank you - you GOT it!
I wrote that way on purpose to try a little intrigue . Your review gave me a sigh of relief
Hugs,
Trish

Comment from giraffmang

Good

Hi there,

I'm not sure I entirely followed the conversation's meaning. Unless it's about life getting in the way of the relationship?

'Hi, can I come and talk ?'-- delete the space before the ?

You need to insert end punctuation before the closing speech marks more consistently. You only close the sentences/dialogue off if using an exclamation mark or question mark but they all need closed off.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018

---

reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018

The character omission was intentional for mistique.
Thanks for the reminders,
A verb is needed ? but they all need closed off? should read ? but they all need TO BE closed off (touché LOL).
thanks so much for your review
Hugs, Trisha

Comment from Asem.inspirations

Excellent

Good morning, Sunshine: I hear that you guys are getting some really bad weather down there. We are having a blizzard today with subzero winds, freezing.

Anyway, I was happy to see that you joined this contest. The conversation is brief and to the point and it's credible and well written. I hope you do well in this contest.

 Comment Written 04-Jan-2018

---

reply by the author on 06-Jan-2018

Part two will reveal all. Yes we had freezing wind nights and days. It?s supposed to be back in the 70 range soon. Thanks for your encouraging review
Hugs, Trisha