Miscellaneous Poems Vol 2
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Quokka"More poems
9 total reviews
Comment from --Turtle.
Great job with the tone and concepts relayed in this poem. Along with the picture... (sheesh, some simple part of my brain is kinda compelled to give six stars for the picture alone).
Unfortunately, I'm useless when it comes to a form of a sonnet. What I can say is that the flow and beat and arrangement was pleasing to my ear, an essence of old fashioned turns of phrasings, but not stuffy. Smooth. Between the lines there's a cutting edge of human rebuke, and in each line a blunt hit of it.
The use of the aura surrounding the image of the quokka does something to accentuate the sense of a creature who embodies a secret knowing of a better way, one envied. I wish I could wear a perfect smile, one unburdened by the disappointment felt given the sorry state of the human heart and ... long string of epic fails racked up over a short time.
Double points for the definition in the author's notes.
Also me knowing, with a sad too-true, most cooing over the adorable picture of a quokka would likely eat the thing without a second thought given if it were on a menu without a picture.
Only thought for update...
If supplication worked, I think I'd pray(: or ,)?
(Seems like this line needs a comma or maybe even a colon for the dialogue coming after it.)
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2017
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Great job with the tone and concepts relayed in this poem. Along with the picture... (sheesh, some simple part of my brain is kinda compelled to give six stars for the picture alone).
Unfortunately, I'm useless when it comes to a form of a sonnet. What I can say is that the flow and beat and arrangement was pleasing to my ear, an essence of old fashioned turns of phrasings, but not stuffy. Smooth. Between the lines there's a cutting edge of human rebuke, and in each line a blunt hit of it.
The use of the aura surrounding the image of the quokka does something to accentuate the sense of a creature who embodies a secret knowing of a better way, one envied. I wish I could wear a perfect smile, one unburdened by the disappointment felt given the sorry state of the human heart and ... long string of epic fails racked up over a short time.
Double points for the definition in the author's notes.
Also me knowing, with a sad too-true, most cooing over the adorable picture of a quokka would likely eat the thing without a second thought given if it were on a menu without a picture.
Only thought for update...
If supplication worked, I think I'd pray(: or ,)?
(Seems like this line needs a comma or maybe even a colon for the dialogue coming after it.)
Comment Written 30-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2017
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Thanks again, Turtle, for the wonderful review. I'm always grateful for the time you take to properly understand what I'm trying to get at. I think you're right about the colon, fixing it now. Much appreciation, Craig
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Gorgeous photo Craig and how cute is he with that natural smile, wish I was as photogenic. We do rather think we own it all don't we. Interesting author notes, especially -Humans-LOL. Good message in this one, maybe we should settle back a bit and be more Quokka like.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Gorgeous photo Craig and how cute is he with that natural smile, wish I was as photogenic. We do rather think we own it all don't we. Interesting author notes, especially -Humans-LOL. Good message in this one, maybe we should settle back a bit and be more Quokka like.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thanks Valda. I definitely would like to swap places with him for a while :)
Comment from BeasPeas
Hi Craig. I just love learning about this adorable animal, the quokka. What a cutie. You are so right. If he is not afraid of humans he may not be the smartest animal but surely one of the cutest. Humans are vicious beings to be approached with caution. Your sonnet is wonderful. I enjoyed reading it. Much luck in the contest. Marilyn
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Hi Craig. I just love learning about this adorable animal, the quokka. What a cutie. You are so right. If he is not afraid of humans he may not be the smartest animal but surely one of the cutest. Humans are vicious beings to be approached with caution. Your sonnet is wonderful. I enjoyed reading it. Much luck in the contest. Marilyn
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thanks so much for the lovely comments, Marilyn, I really appreciate them. They are really lovely little things, only about the size of a house cat. Many thanks - Craig
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You're welcome. :)
Comment from zanya
What an interesting little marsupial - the Quokka- I have never heard of this little creature but here in this poem written by a poet who lives 'in the middle of nowhere'-he is celebrated -isn't this one of the joys of a writing site-sharing our corner of the planet and its riches with others across the globe- well done !
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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What an interesting little marsupial - the Quokka- I have never heard of this little creature but here in this poem written by a poet who lives 'in the middle of nowhere'-he is celebrated -isn't this one of the joys of a writing site-sharing our corner of the planet and its riches with others across the globe- well done !
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thank you for the positive comments. It is indeed a great joy to read things from people from all corners of the world. Craig
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks freedom of living is worthy, man or animal understands the essence of life, as poet wishes to get a quokka life once on earth, they are so lively, free, happy to live a life; I liked.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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This speaks freedom of living is worthy, man or animal understands the essence of life, as poet wishes to get a quokka life once on earth, they are so lively, free, happy to live a life; I liked.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thank you for the kind review. Much appreciated, and I'm glad you liked it. Craig
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
LOL ... this little Quokka really does look like he's smiling. Very cute. I've never heard of such a creature.
This is an original premise for a write and a great entry for the Sonnet contest, Craig. Your rhyme scheme is spot on for a Sonnet, and yes, to bad that we humans are never content with our lot.
Best wishes for the contest! ~~ Connie
PS: love your definition of a human in your author notes! Haha
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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LOL ... this little Quokka really does look like he's smiling. Very cute. I've never heard of such a creature.
This is an original premise for a write and a great entry for the Sonnet contest, Craig. Your rhyme scheme is spot on for a Sonnet, and yes, to bad that we humans are never content with our lot.
Best wishes for the contest! ~~ Connie
PS: love your definition of a human in your author notes! Haha
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thanks for the lovely review, Connie. Glad you enjoyed finding out about our little furry friends. Cheers, Craig
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written sonnet about the human race who think they are gods and have more power than the Almighty God who gives them permission to look after the animals and plants of the earth. All are good and well until they start to bypass God and His will and do only their own will. We have a lot to learn from the Quokka for sure.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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A very well-written sonnet about the human race who think they are gods and have more power than the Almighty God who gives them permission to look after the animals and plants of the earth. All are good and well until they start to bypass God and His will and do only their own will. We have a lot to learn from the Quokka for sure.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thanks for your kind words, Sandra, and as always, for taking the time to review my poem. Much appreciated - Craig
Comment from Gloria ....
Aw, Quokka certainly is a cute little guy. Seems to have fairly long claws, yes? We don't have these little darlings in Canada.
On to your sonnet, your metre is of course terrific, and rhymes. Your sonnet form written to order and the couplet does take us off in a different direction of imagining ourselves to be a quokka for only one day.
Great job, Craig and best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
PS: I got a kick out of your definition of humanoids. So true!!
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Aw, Quokka certainly is a cute little guy. Seems to have fairly long claws, yes? We don't have these little darlings in Canada.
On to your sonnet, your metre is of course terrific, and rhymes. Your sonnet form written to order and the couplet does take us off in a different direction of imagining ourselves to be a quokka for only one day.
Great job, Craig and best wishes to you in the contest.
Gloria
PS: I got a kick out of your definition of humanoids. So true!!
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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I'm very grateful for the fun review, Gloria. My other half has long claws too, but thankfully doesn't use them often. Many thanks for the lovely shiny stars :) Cheers, Craig
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
What a wonderful idea and to be like this little creature would be quite a feat and yet peaceful. Nice sonnet for the contest, excellent flow and rhyme
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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What a wonderful idea and to be like this little creature would be quite a feat and yet peaceful. Nice sonnet for the contest, excellent flow and rhyme
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Thanks for the kind comments, Barb. They do seem to have an idyllic life, for the most part. Cheers, craig
