The Death Collector
Looking into the dark dimension of dreams13 total reviews
Comment from smileycloud
"With shrouded arm, extended firm,
Demands in silence, he
With whetted sickle, glistening sharp
Commands compliancy..."
all of the poem is an extreme nightmare
but this here was my most fav
a very compelling story and a great entry in the contest
have a smiley day
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2017
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"With shrouded arm, extended firm,
Demands in silence, he
With whetted sickle, glistening sharp
Commands compliancy..."
all of the poem is an extreme nightmare
but this here was my most fav
a very compelling story and a great entry in the contest
have a smiley day
Comment Written 25-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for a wonderful review! It was eerie, but sort of fun to write! Am so glad you enjoyed it! Thanks again for the great review... And enjoy your day!
Comment from Sis Cat
This is a scary poem that I should not read at night before bedtime. Your visions are precisely the things that scare me. You write them so well, using the image of the Grim Reaper:
With shrouded arm, extended firm,
Demands in silence, he
With whetted sickle, glistening sharp
Commands compliancy...
Your poem is well rhymed and vivid.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you much success with this fine entry.
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2017
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This is a scary poem that I should not read at night before bedtime. Your visions are precisely the things that scare me. You write them so well, using the image of the Grim Reaper:
With shrouded arm, extended firm,
Demands in silence, he
With whetted sickle, glistening sharp
Commands compliancy...
Your poem is well rhymed and vivid.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you much success with this fine entry.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 25-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for a wonderful review - am so happy you enjoyed this one... it's a little spookier than I usually like to write, and is one of several Halloween pieces that I prepared several years ago. Thanks again for a lovely review! Enjoy your day!
Comment from janbar
Your poem evoked feelings of fear and dread at a visceral level. Very well written. Only one suggestion: in the last stanza I think by making dream plural (dreams) it would read a little smoother. Thank you for sharing your talent. janbar
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2017
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Your poem evoked feelings of fear and dread at a visceral level. Very well written. Only one suggestion: in the last stanza I think by making dream plural (dreams) it would read a little smoother. Thank you for sharing your talent. janbar
Comment Written 24-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 24-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for a wonderful review - and I greatly appreciate the feedback on pluralizing to "dreams!" Am so happy you enjoyed!
Comment from moongirlwriter
Whew. . . . now THAT was some nightmare! This poem stirred my emotions and sent chills down my back. I love the language you've used and found the rhyming
to work perfectly for the poem.
I would not like to have such a nightmare. This writing is really worth six stars.
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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Whew. . . . now THAT was some nightmare! This poem stirred my emotions and sent chills down my back. I love the language you've used and found the rhyming
to work perfectly for the poem.
I would not like to have such a nightmare. This writing is really worth six stars.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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I'm so glad you enjoyed this - I had written this several years ago and thought it sounded nightmarish, so when I saw the "Worst Nightmare" contest posted, I did a little adapting to place in the 1st person and add the Prelude for the dream sequence. Thank you so much for this wonderful review - and again, so happy that you liked it!
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yes, I did like it but don't ever want to experience it. :)
Comment from Lucian Carter
This feels like a nightmare (in a good way), so it's perfect for this contest.I like the imagery and word choices. Rhyming fear with air is a stretch. That's my biggest complaint. Otherwise, this is a really good piece and I wish you luck with it.
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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This feels like a nightmare (in a good way), so it's perfect for this contest.I like the imagery and word choices. Rhyming fear with air is a stretch. That's my biggest complaint. Otherwise, this is a really good piece and I wish you luck with it.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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LOL! Yes - it is a little stretch - probably took too much of a "literary license" here... Will have to re-think that line! Thank you so much for a great review - am so glad you enjoyed!
Comment from Mustang Patty
You've created a great deal of imagery here. Within the lines of your poem, you've given voice to the fears we feel in the dream world. I have horrid nightmares, and I can't even enter this contest. To recall the machinations of the night would be more pain.
Well done and good luck in the contest. I would give you a six if I had one, so instead, I will give you a virtual one ******
~patty~
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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You've created a great deal of imagery here. Within the lines of your poem, you've given voice to the fears we feel in the dream world. I have horrid nightmares, and I can't even enter this contest. To recall the machinations of the night would be more pain.
Well done and good luck in the contest. I would give you a six if I had one, so instead, I will give you a virtual one ******
~patty~
Comment Written 22-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for your review and certainly hope it doesn't give you additional nightmares to add to those you already have. Most of my nightmares are not really spooky but certainly un-nerving as the center around loosing all my teeth after biting into a banana (LOL) and trying to get to a destination in which I never make it through an endless snow-storm! Thank you again for your wonderful support and great review!
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks simply as nightmare with Halloween state in action in dreams, all dark, scaring and black objects of the dreams feasible and natural in dreams are expressed; I liked.
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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This speaks simply as nightmare with Halloween state in action in dreams, all dark, scaring and black objects of the dreams feasible and natural in dreams are expressed; I liked.
Comment Written 22-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2017
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So glad you enjoyed! I had not originally written this as a scary dream, but as part of a series of spooky stories told during a local, annual Halloween tour event. When I came across the "Worst Nightmare" contest, I adapted to have it read in the 1st person (as "my" worst nightmare), additionally adding the Prelude stanza. Thank you so much for the great review!
Comment from For better for verse
Enjoyed your poem a lot, you really created that spooky atmosphere. I can smell that rotting soil and the stench of death.
Very well written.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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Enjoyed your poem a lot, you really created that spooky atmosphere. I can smell that rotting soil and the stench of death.
Very well written.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for reviewing this piece and for the great comments! Am so happy that you enjoyed it!
Comment from pome lover
well, feeling yourself "seep into a strange dimension" would definitely be horrible nightmare.
I know people say "the sound of silence," but I've never understood how you "hear" it. Your poem, however, certainly creates a fear of offending the death collector. You describe him well.
I bet it made a great Halloween story. And it's a good entry for the Worst Nightmare contest.
Best of luck.
pome lover
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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well, feeling yourself "seep into a strange dimension" would definitely be horrible nightmare.
I know people say "the sound of silence," but I've never understood how you "hear" it. Your poem, however, certainly creates a fear of offending the death collector. You describe him well.
I bet it made a great Halloween story. And it's a good entry for the Worst Nightmare contest.
Best of luck.
pome lover
Comment Written 19-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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Thank you so much for your comments! I did enjoy the challenge of trying to describe the death collector and setting the scene. Thanks again for the great review!
Comment from Cindy Warren
With nightmares like that I don't know how you'd get any sleep at all. If I was seeing the grim reaper at night I'd never sleep again. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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With nightmares like that I don't know how you'd get any sleep at all. If I was seeing the grim reaper at night I'd never sleep again. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 19-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2017
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Thanks, Cindy! I think I scared myself when writing it! LOL!
