Thoughtful Poems and Prose
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Blinding Rain"Commentary and Philosophy
12 total reviews
Comment from ragerde
What a lovely, sad portrait of a sightless person on a rainy day, tears falling with the pouring rain. There is genuine pathos in the IMAGE RYOKAN. I like the juxtaposition of glass eyes and windowpane. GOOD JOB.
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2017
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What a lovely, sad portrait of a sightless person on a rainy day, tears falling with the pouring rain. There is genuine pathos in the IMAGE RYOKAN. I like the juxtaposition of glass eyes and windowpane. GOOD JOB.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 18-Aug-2017
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Thanks for reading. My friend had her eye removed due to melanoma (cancer). She now has a glass eye. She cried when the diagnosis was made.
IMAGE RYOKAN--?
The image is my own. It was taken from my kitchen window a few years ago. If it is with Ryokan Images, it's been pirated. Many of my scenic images on FB are open to public view because creation belongs to all.
Thanks again.
Comment from BeasPeas
This is a heart wrenching and powerfully written nonet on the loss of sight. Your piece describes the devastation of such a loss. Independence relies on our senses being intact. Marilyn
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
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This is a heart wrenching and powerfully written nonet on the loss of sight. Your piece describes the devastation of such a loss. Independence relies on our senses being intact. Marilyn
Comment Written 17-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2017
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Thank you, Marilyn. I wrote this as a tribute to my friend who was diagnosed with melanoma of the eye. She cried when told and now has a glass eye.
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A touching poem and it got my vote. My heart goes out to your friend. Marilyn
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Thank you.
Comment from Irish Rain
The loss of sight, a horrible loss. I love how you've used the dripping rain to emphasize this, and it's a wonderful picture too, great entry, blessings....
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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The loss of sight, a horrible loss. I love how you've used the dripping rain to emphasize this, and it's a wonderful picture too, great entry, blessings....
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you for reading. Lately, we have had heavy rains. My friend had her eye removed due to cancer (melanoma of the eye). She cried when she was told that it had to be removed and be replaced with a glass eye. Her tear duct in the blind eye runs often.
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Ah, rains...so appropriate...your friend is very brave, and lucky to have you!
Comment from kiwigirl2821
hello, At least my dear girl, you get the benefit of mist on your face and air that is breathable, sounds that are music and your tongue can taste the realness of life. I hope this is not biographical. It is written with such specific detail and emotion. Good luck in this contest. xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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hello, At least my dear girl, you get the benefit of mist on your face and air that is breathable, sounds that are music and your tongue can taste the realness of life. I hope this is not biographical. It is written with such specific detail and emotion. Good luck in this contest. xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thanks for reading. It's been pouring with rain. I was thinking of my friend who was diagnosed with melanoma of the eye (cancer) and cried. She had the eye removed and it was replaced with a glass one.
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so sad, it's been doing a bit of thrashing rain down here as well. Will pray for your friend. xx d
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks pains of loss of sight and how it feels like blinding rain in courses of living at the instance of teardrops falling incessantly all the year round; I liked.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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This speaks pains of loss of sight and how it feels like blinding rain in courses of living at the instance of teardrops falling incessantly all the year round; I liked.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you for reading. Thank you. My friend had melanoma of the eye (cancer). She cried when she was told it had to be removed and replaced with a glass eye.
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent. This is a well written and interesting poem. The artwork is beautiful and compliments your writing. It should do well in the contest. I wish you the best of luck.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Excellent. This is a well written and interesting poem. The artwork is beautiful and compliments your writing. It should do well in the contest. I wish you the best of luck.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you. My friend had melanoma of the eye (cancer). She cried when she was told it had to be removed and replaced with a glass eye.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very interesting Nonet Poem you have penned for the contest. You used very good descriptive wording and very good imagery. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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This is a very interesting Nonet Poem you have penned for the contest. You used very good descriptive wording and very good imagery. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you. My friend had melanoma of the eye (cancer). She cried when she was told it had to be removed and replaced with a glass eye.
Comment from Mustang Patty
thank you for sharing your entry in the Nonet poetry contest. I see that you have managed to meet the syllable requirements and have your lines flow nicely. I do have a problem with 'glass eyes stare,' and the visions of a grey sky and pouring rain. Was this person born with sight and then lost it? How else would they know about color and visions of falling rain.
Just a few things to think about,
~patty~
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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thank you for sharing your entry in the Nonet poetry contest. I see that you have managed to meet the syllable requirements and have your lines flow nicely. I do have a problem with 'glass eyes stare,' and the visions of a grey sky and pouring rain. Was this person born with sight and then lost it? How else would they know about color and visions of falling rain.
Just a few things to think about,
~patty~
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you. My friend had melanoma of the eye (cancer). She cried when she was told it had to be removed and replaced with a glass eye. We live in a wet part of the country.
Comment from dmt1967
This is a profound poem and I like the hills and dales in the picture. I liked the way the poem flowed and the way the picture and poem gelled. Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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This is a profound poem and I like the hills and dales in the picture. I liked the way the poem flowed and the way the picture and poem gelled. Good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thank you. My friend had melanoma of the eye (cancer). She cried when she was told it had to be removed and replaced with a glass eye.
Comment from Dean Kuch
This is a good nonet, Anonymous Poet. It's very descriptive and charged with emotion. You've also managed to incorporate rhyme into the mix.
My only concern is that line five contains just four syllables when I believe the form calls for five.
It's an easy fix. Simply add the word "is" to that line:
Sight loss IS my pain.
That will give you the proper syllabic structure you need.
Good luck!
~Dean
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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This is a good nonet, Anonymous Poet. It's very descriptive and charged with emotion. You've also managed to incorporate rhyme into the mix.
My only concern is that line five contains just four syllables when I believe the form calls for five.
It's an easy fix. Simply add the word "is" to that line:
Sight loss IS my pain.
That will give you the proper syllabic structure you need.
Good luck!
~Dean
Comment Written 14-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 14-Aug-2017
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Thanks for the heads up.
I made a quick edit and forgot to check.
