Worlds
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Sloth Race"Animal poetry and short stories
18 total reviews
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Oh, how true it is - and what a wonderful one this was!! ;) Whew! No sixteen-legged creatures! And hooray for sloths - of course, my favoritist sloth in the world works at the DMV in the movie 'Zootopia'... lol!! ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 19-May-2020
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Oh, how true it is - and what a wonderful one this was!! ;) Whew! No sixteen-legged creatures! And hooray for sloths - of course, my favoritist sloth in the world works at the DMV in the movie 'Zootopia'... lol!! ;) Yvette
Comment Written 19-May-2020
reply by the author on 19-May-2020
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Thank you, Yvette
Comment from oliver818
Nice work, I like the way you rewrote this story with so many new animals, it's really works well. I like the rhythm and pace of this piece too. Thanks for sharing and have a great day
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2017
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Nice work, I like the way you rewrote this story with so many new animals, it's really works well. I like the rhythm and pace of this piece too. Thanks for sharing and have a great day
Comment Written 23-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2017
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Thanks, Oliver
Comment from Poetic Friend
Bill, I am enjoying your sloth series. You have shown us that there is much to write with that theme, and you are writing it well, using innovative personification.
I love the moral of this story, it one in which we need to be reminded,
Thank you, my friend.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2017
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Bill, I am enjoying your sloth series. You have shown us that there is much to write with that theme, and you are writing it well, using innovative personification.
I love the moral of this story, it one in which we need to be reminded,
Thank you, my friend.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2017
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Thank you, PF, for the great review. Bill
Comment from BeasPeas
Good story in a poem of the race. That's true. Sometimes stamina is what saves the day, just plain old hanging in there. Rhyming and pace is excellent. Amusing throughout. Good luck in the contest. Marilyn
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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Good story in a poem of the race. That's true. Sometimes stamina is what saves the day, just plain old hanging in there. Rhyming and pace is excellent. Amusing throughout. Good luck in the contest. Marilyn
Comment Written 22-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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Thanks, Marilyn. I liked this one too.
Comment from pipersfancy
I chuckled throughout this fast paced and well-rhymed poem! The only "glitch" I note in in your closing lines:
the winner's not always the fleet (fleetest? you use this as a noun, and it calls to mind the Navy's fleet...)
but sometimes who is left.
For the poet's consideration, I offer the following suggestion:
the winner isn't always fast,
but sometimes, just who's left.
Best wishes for your contest,
pf
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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I chuckled throughout this fast paced and well-rhymed poem! The only "glitch" I note in in your closing lines:
the winner's not always the fleet (fleetest? you use this as a noun, and it calls to mind the Navy's fleet...)
but sometimes who is left.
For the poet's consideration, I offer the following suggestion:
the winner isn't always fast,
but sometimes, just who's left.
Best wishes for your contest,
pf
Comment Written 22-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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Thank you, PF, for the great review and suggestion. I see fleet as the adjective of choice here, with poetic license rounding the grammatic edges for me.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written story poem. It is not always the fastest or the smartest that wins the race, but the one who keeps going whatever it takes without giving up until the end.
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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A very well-written story poem. It is not always the fastest or the smartest that wins the race, but the one who keeps going whatever it takes without giving up until the end.
Comment Written 22-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2017
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Thanks, Sandra
Comment from frogbook
Hahaha. Now this is a favorite. I especially enjoyed the descriptions of the sloths rapid movements. LOL. Entertaining and inventive, a great read and a worthy contest entry.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hahaha. Now this is a favorite. I especially enjoyed the descriptions of the sloths rapid movements. LOL. Entertaining and inventive, a great read and a worthy contest entry.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Thanks, FB.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A poignant story! Although I heard my son in law instruct his daughter before sports day, "remember it's the winning that matters not the taking part!' I was shocked by his instruction but my grand daughter went on to win 3 out of her 4 races! Poignant words here, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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A poignant story! Although I heard my son in law instruct his daughter before sports day, "remember it's the winning that matters not the taking part!' I was shocked by his instruction but my grand daughter went on to win 3 out of her 4 races! Poignant words here, love Dolly x
Comment Written 21-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Coach Lombardi once said, "It's not if you win or lose that counts, it's if you win."
Comment from nomi338
Just like a broken clock is right twice a day. If the time when it is correct is when you just happen to check it, then it is rewarded as being the perfect time piece. In all of life, timing is everything. To be at the right place at the right time is perfection.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Just like a broken clock is right twice a day. If the time when it is correct is when you just happen to check it, then it is rewarded as being the perfect time piece. In all of life, timing is everything. To be at the right place at the right time is perfection.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Thanks, nomi
Comment from Dean Kuch
Hahaha...
Slow and steady wins the race every time, Bill. At least that's what my daddy always told me, most likely because I'm slow.
So, I guess it could be conceivably said that the sloth was the winner by a hare.
This was grrrrreat, my fiend.
I hope you do well in the contest with this.
~Dean ;)
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Hahaha...
Slow and steady wins the race every time, Bill. At least that's what my daddy always told me, most likely because I'm slow.
So, I guess it could be conceivably said that the sloth was the winner by a hare.
This was grrrrreat, my fiend.
I hope you do well in the contest with this.
~Dean ;)
Comment Written 20-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2017
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Thanks, Dean. Sloth gave a victory speech that went on through the night(and he was just clearing his throat).
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Go figure...
