Vetting Washington
Who leading whom - freestyle16 total reviews
Comment from LIJ Red
Flags of Our Fathers and the sequel, Flyboys, are eye-opening reading. I think the author was jolted to find recently that his ancestor was not in the Suribachi photo,
but in the other flagraising, earlier and not pictured. Ira Hays was definitely in the picture. I think your politics are very sound, as Sabatini wrote. Freestyle, eh?
Reads fine for me.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2017
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Flags of Our Fathers and the sequel, Flyboys, are eye-opening reading. I think the author was jolted to find recently that his ancestor was not in the Suribachi photo,
but in the other flagraising, earlier and not pictured. Ira Hays was definitely in the picture. I think your politics are very sound, as Sabatini wrote. Freestyle, eh?
Reads fine for me.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2017
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Thank you for reading and reviewing my poem. I write most things freestyle because trying to stay to a particular rhyme scheme restricts what I want to say. I did know about the photos but wanted to refer to Native American roles in WWII. As always I appreciate your comments.
Comment from Nikki-Nicole
You've written a great poem.
Good title: 'Vetting Washington'
The words of this poem come together and create a masterpiece.
The image shown supports the title and poem. The background goes well with the art and color of font chosen.
Thanks for sharing your poetry.
Good luck with your future writing.
-Nicole-
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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You've written a great poem.
Good title: 'Vetting Washington'
The words of this poem come together and create a masterpiece.
The image shown supports the title and poem. The background goes well with the art and color of font chosen.
Thanks for sharing your poetry.
Good luck with your future writing.
-Nicole-
Comment Written 06-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Thank you for reading my poem and for your very kind review. I appreciate your feedback and I am glad you enjoyed my writing.
Comment from robyn corum
D.,
I really didn't 'like' this poem. It's a bit too negative and pessimistic for my taste. *smile* (surprise, right?) But I completely see why you say the things you do and have these feelings. I just hope things will improve. They kind of HAVE to, don't they? Anyway, you used supremely effective wording and phrasing to get your message across and though I didn't completely agree, I appreciated and enjoyed the read. Thanks!
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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D.,
I really didn't 'like' this poem. It's a bit too negative and pessimistic for my taste. *smile* (surprise, right?) But I completely see why you say the things you do and have these feelings. I just hope things will improve. They kind of HAVE to, don't they? Anyway, you used supremely effective wording and phrasing to get your message across and though I didn't completely agree, I appreciated and enjoyed the read. Thanks!
Comment Written 06-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Well, I didn't expect everyone to like or agree with what I had to say but I appreciate your reading and feedback. I do hope things will get better somehow though. We really need some better people to run for various offices in our government. I think though that the type of people who want to be in office have a certain mindset in the first place that makes a lot of them, in my mind, unqualified. Or perhaps I've become jaded?
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I don't think so. I agree.
Comment from Hansel1
A powerful look into our nation's current situation. 'Are you ready to work, on a new brand's plantation' - favorite line.
It's unfortunate that as bad as things appear, we reap what we sow. As a democracy, the people vote for those in power, and therefore it is still up to us to make change to what is not fit, hold authorities accountable, and be sure to make our message known.
Thank you for sharing your work - Cheers!
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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A powerful look into our nation's current situation. 'Are you ready to work, on a new brand's plantation' - favorite line.
It's unfortunate that as bad as things appear, we reap what we sow. As a democracy, the people vote for those in power, and therefore it is still up to us to make change to what is not fit, hold authorities accountable, and be sure to make our message known.
Thank you for sharing your work - Cheers!
Comment Written 06-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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I think I read one time that we get the government we deserve. I think we need to demand better than what we have but we are responsible for what we get. I guess, as a people, we have to be better or maybe do better. Thank you for reading my poem and for your feedback.
Comment from c_lucas
Serving in the military
for some, a way of life
For others, Hell on Earth
Take heed and seize the day
***
The last line is not mine, but it is a way to live your life. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Serving in the military
for some, a way of life
For others, Hell on Earth
Take heed and seize the day
***
The last line is not mine, but it is a way to live your life. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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I didn't find it much fun. But then, I allowed myself to be sheepdipped which isn't exactly the same. Thank you for reading my poem and for your comments.
Comment from Oatmeal
Delahay,
The flow was very nice. The arrangement is understandable and effective. The theme was good. Created impressions through the descriptions are vivid, forceful and making the reader think about it. The artwork complemented your poem.
I saw no SPAG and no typos. Everything looked in place.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Delahay,
The flow was very nice. The arrangement is understandable and effective. The theme was good. Created impressions through the descriptions are vivid, forceful and making the reader think about it. The artwork complemented your poem.
I saw no SPAG and no typos. Everything looked in place.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 05-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much for reading my poem and for your review. I appreciate your feedback.
Comment from royowen
I like the way you have married the present with the past, that even though history appears to be different, man hasn't changed, he's just as basically corrupt as he was. Well dine, beautifully wiritten, in language the matches the theme, giving it a sense of ironic cynicism. Well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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I like the way you have married the present with the past, that even though history appears to be different, man hasn't changed, he's just as basically corrupt as he was. Well dine, beautifully wiritten, in language the matches the theme, giving it a sense of ironic cynicism. Well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 05-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Thank you for reading my poem and for your review. I do believe that history has a habit of repeating itself and things tend to stay the same even when they seem to change.
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I think you're right
Comment from Mitchell Brontė
I thought this was a excellent poem. the music in the language was nicely stitched, I loved all the alliterations, the dense thicket of sounds carefully woven in this piece. I think the images were excellent as well, The expressionist sense of language marry beautifully with the metaphors for the moods and personalities.
This is both powerful and emotive....very well done
Mitchell
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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I thought this was a excellent poem. the music in the language was nicely stitched, I loved all the alliterations, the dense thicket of sounds carefully woven in this piece. I think the images were excellent as well, The expressionist sense of language marry beautifully with the metaphors for the moods and personalities.
This is both powerful and emotive....very well done
Mitchell
Comment Written 05-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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Thank you very much for your lovely and lyrical review. I appreciate the feedback.
Comment from Jay Squires
I've read this through a number of times, Ward. Very intuitively written, I'm afraid. I only had wispy feelings of where it was going, and I'm probably far off with it. I got the feeling with
"They always say Jesus
When looking at Mary
They gave her more names
Than she could carry
that you are referencing the missionary priests who "civilized" the Indians in California by converting their Indian myths into a Christian mold. The Indians easily identifies with Mother Mary while only being luke-warm with Jesus. I'm sure similar examples can be recounted with other Indian tribes in other states.
Like I said it seems very intuitive. I really can't take it much further. Sorry.
Jay
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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I've read this through a number of times, Ward. Very intuitively written, I'm afraid. I only had wispy feelings of where it was going, and I'm probably far off with it. I got the feeling with
"They always say Jesus
When looking at Mary
They gave her more names
Than she could carry
that you are referencing the missionary priests who "civilized" the Indians in California by converting their Indian myths into a Christian mold. The Indians easily identifies with Mother Mary while only being luke-warm with Jesus. I'm sure similar examples can be recounted with other Indian tribes in other states.
Like I said it seems very intuitive. I really can't take it much further. Sorry.
Jay
Comment Written 05-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2017
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It meant a couple of different things to me. One was the way this country was frequently built on lies, to the Natives and others. But it also is about politicians now who talk out of both sides of their mouths while giving lip service to religion to get the support of churches. They also give lip to women while not supporting them in many ways. I try to be a little vague at times so people can read what they feel in what I write too. I appreciate your comments, as always. I hope I didn't make this one too hard.
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With poetry, it's easy to be too hard for me. Not my forte.
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I know it's not your favorite type of writing so I do appreciate your effort and feedback.
Comment from AnitaFaye
Love this poem. It's one hundred percent on point, a disturbingly accurate description of what our country has become--painfully so. Author is to be commended for its content and cadence. I like the reference to Ira Hayes, a true hero whose name is known to Americans who know their WWII history. His treatment following his heroic act is a sad indictment on our society.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2017
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Love this poem. It's one hundred percent on point, a disturbingly accurate description of what our country has become--painfully so. Author is to be commended for its content and cadence. I like the reference to Ira Hayes, a true hero whose name is known to Americans who know their WWII history. His treatment following his heroic act is a sad indictment on our society.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much for reading my poem and for your feedback. I appreciate your comments. Many people seem to be unaware of the many Native Americans who served in WWII.
