Patterns
Viewing comments for Chapter 3 "New York City"poetry
15 total reviews
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Blast from the past! I'm playing Portfolio Roulette, specifically the variant we call "Blue Ribbon Surprise"--i.e. the aim is to ferret out a piece with 14 reviews and top it off! Congrats on your recognition pending.
This poem is brillianly evocative--you nailed New York City!
typo:
Walk [passed->PAST] the bums sleeping in the doorways
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2021
Blast from the past! I'm playing Portfolio Roulette, specifically the variant we call "Blue Ribbon Surprise"--i.e. the aim is to ferret out a piece with 14 reviews and top it off! Congrats on your recognition pending.
This poem is brillianly evocative--you nailed New York City!
typo:
Walk [passed->PAST] the bums sleeping in the doorways
Comment Written 22-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2021
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Thanks so much for the excellent review of this piece...this is an old one. But I was born in NYC and lived on Long Island for 51 years, so I hope I know the city, or what the city once was, in some shape or form. I wanted to capture the energy of the city, the possibilities of it, the wide open horizon there. estory
Comment from Asem.inspirations
Hello there estory, Yes...New York City...the city that never sleeps. I enjoyed your description of New York and all of it is so true. I too was grew up in New York and I still live here now. It is everything that you said it is and more. I have lived in three Boros, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and I work in Manhattan.
Your poem has captured the excitement of this wonderful city. It is still one of the great places in the world, that no matter where you travel, everyone has heard about it or knows about. They are all eager to one day visit New York City. I enjoyed this adventurous ride that you took us on in explaining New York City through the eyes of a New Yorker. Thank you, this is a great free verse.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
Hello there estory, Yes...New York City...the city that never sleeps. I enjoyed your description of New York and all of it is so true. I too was grew up in New York and I still live here now. It is everything that you said it is and more. I have lived in three Boros, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and I work in Manhattan.
Your poem has captured the excitement of this wonderful city. It is still one of the great places in the world, that no matter where you travel, everyone has heard about it or knows about. They are all eager to one day visit New York City. I enjoyed this adventurous ride that you took us on in explaining New York City through the eyes of a New Yorker. Thank you, this is a great free verse.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the great review and for your wonderful comments supporting the piece. It is especially great coming from a fellow New Yorker. New York is in many ways a microcosm of the world, and life. It encompasses a lot and I thought the best way to capture it was in abstract expressionist glimpses, to create a sense of it. estory
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Wow, you brought New York City to life! I have never been, so I found your poem enlightening and I would just love to visit, a poem to send to the tourist board! Love Dolly x
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
Wow, you brought New York City to life! I have never been, so I found your poem enlightening and I would just love to visit, a poem to send to the tourist board! Love Dolly x
Comment Written 14-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thank you for your wonderful review and comments supporting this piece. I am glad you enjoyed this behind the scenes tour of NY. New York is in many ways a microcosm of the world, and life. estory
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
I enjoyed reading your free verse poem about NY city. From what I have seen in the media, I would say you did a great job capturing the sights/sounds/nuances of it. I like the contrasts with the rich/poor light/dark. I like the line about the moons that never set & the carriages in Central park.
Good job & thanks for sharing. I have never been there for real, but this poem took me there in my mind. Jan
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
I enjoyed reading your free verse poem about NY city. From what I have seen in the media, I would say you did a great job capturing the sights/sounds/nuances of it. I like the contrasts with the rich/poor light/dark. I like the line about the moons that never set & the carriages in Central park.
Good job & thanks for sharing. I have never been there for real, but this poem took me there in my mind. Jan
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the great review and for your wonderful comments supporting this poem. NY is a place of contrasts, like life. So I tried to work it all in to an abstract expressionist mural, so to speak. estory
Comment from miajaffri
I think you have captured the sense of New York City. You have included all that
it has to offer, all of its energy and excitement. I think passed is spelled past meaning to pass by.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
I think you have captured the sense of New York City. You have included all that
it has to offer, all of its energy and excitement. I think passed is spelled past meaning to pass by.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the five star review and for your comments supporting this poem. Glad you enjoyed my little tour of my home town estory
Comment from Irish Rain
I LOVE New York. I love poems, stories, movies about New York. For all of the reasons contained in your notes. It is the world, in miniture. More languages are spoken in New York, than anywhere else in the world. It is a HUGE buffet, of good, bad....contrast. Don't like it? Don't put it on your plate. Perhaps the next street corner has what you're looking for. Make no mistake though...it's there. I LOVE New York!!! Blessings....
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
I LOVE New York. I love poems, stories, movies about New York. For all of the reasons contained in your notes. It is the world, in miniture. More languages are spoken in New York, than anywhere else in the world. It is a HUGE buffet, of good, bad....contrast. Don't like it? Don't put it on your plate. Perhaps the next street corner has what you're looking for. Make no mistake though...it's there. I LOVE New York!!! Blessings....
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks again for this wonderful six star review and for all your wonderful comments supporting this poem. New York is contemporary and romantic, historic and relevant, good and bad, uplifting and depressing all at the same time. I was so lucky to grow up there and be exposed to all the art, music, and theatre that shaped my life. estory
Comment from Ogden
As a fellow New Yorker, I share your feelings about our city.
i think you accomplished what you intended, as explained in your notes.
I have a suggestion. In the notes, you include poverty one of New York's characteristics you want the poem to include, but, fortunately, (in my opinion) it doesn't. no doubt, it's an oversight that you will want to address.
I also noticed an error in the second stanza. "Passed" should be "past."
Nice job, estory!
Don (aka Ogden)
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
As a fellow New Yorker, I share your feelings about our city.
i think you accomplished what you intended, as explained in your notes.
I have a suggestion. In the notes, you include poverty one of New York's characteristics you want the poem to include, but, fortunately, (in my opinion) it doesn't. no doubt, it's an oversight that you will want to address.
I also noticed an error in the second stanza. "Passed" should be "past."
Nice job, estory!
Don (aka Ogden)
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the great review and for your comments supporting the poem. I think I do have some scenes of homeless people in the poem, so I made sure it was in there. estory
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I'm sorry, estory. You misunderstood my meaning.
My fault. I just reread my comments, and I can see that they may not have been specific enough.
My point was that I believe that the topic of poverty (which exists everywhere) is not in keeping with the intent of your poem - enthusiastically praising the virtues of New York.
I was trying to advise you only to remove the reference to poverty in your notes.
I hope you agree.
Don
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This is not altogether a poem praising the virtues of New York. New York is a big place, with lots of people, some of whom are struggling. New York has 100,000 homeless people in it. It is city of rich and poor, hope and despair. Possibility and limits. Glitter and grime. I wanted it all to be in the poem. Estory
Comment from Joan E.
I was born in Brooklyn and your free verse brought many memories back to life. (I think in stanzas two and five "past" became "passed".) Yes, you captured the energy plus diversity of New York and why it seems like "the center of the world". Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
I was born in Brooklyn and your free verse brought many memories back to life. (I think in stanzas two and five "past" became "passed".) Yes, you captured the energy plus diversity of New York and why it seems like "the center of the world". Cheers- Joan
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the wonderful review and for all your comments supporting this poem about NY. It is a microcosm for the world, and life. So I had to write this poem about my home town estory
Comment from MaggieF
You certainly capture the vibrancy of New York, I feel I know it better having read this. It flowed well with good rhythm. I loved 'Seem like ghosts of the nineteenth century' it would have been vibrant in a different way then. Enjoyed. MaggieF
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
You certainly capture the vibrancy of New York, I feel I know it better having read this. It flowed well with good rhythm. I loved 'Seem like ghosts of the nineteenth century' it would have been vibrant in a different way then. Enjoyed. MaggieF
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the great review and all your comments supporting this piece. New York is a microcosm of the world, and life, a city full of energy, possibility, choices, moods, metaphors. That's why we call it the Only City. I was so lucky to grow up there and be exposed to all the art, music and theatre that shaped my life forever estory
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Across Manhattan, across Brooklyn and Queens,
Staten Island and the Bronx,
People in all kinds of apartments
Tune in to all kinds of music,
Hip-hop and jazz, Fusion, Rock and Roll,
Classical music,
The news, the weather, public announcements,
Baseball games
And even though the World Series
Is something most of the world could care less about,
The ticker tape parades
Still make it seem like the center of the world. '
You totally convinced me and made New York and it's surrounding suburbs are the centre of the world ! Paris sure doesn't feel like that, nor London. New York has everything, I would love to visit it again, you filled this with passion and made me feel I was there well done xx
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
Across Manhattan, across Brooklyn and Queens,
Staten Island and the Bronx,
People in all kinds of apartments
Tune in to all kinds of music,
Hip-hop and jazz, Fusion, Rock and Roll,
Classical music,
The news, the weather, public announcements,
Baseball games
And even though the World Series
Is something most of the world could care less about,
The ticker tape parades
Still make it seem like the center of the world. '
You totally convinced me and made New York and it's surrounding suburbs are the centre of the world ! Paris sure doesn't feel like that, nor London. New York has everything, I would love to visit it again, you filled this with passion and made me feel I was there well done xx
Comment Written 13-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2017
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Thanks for the terrific review and for your wonderful comments supporting this poem. I am glad you enjoyed it and got connected to the energy, the human power of it. New York is a microcosm of the world, and life. It is happy, sad, contemporary, romantic, uplifting, depressing, full of possibilities and limits. And it will always be my home town. I was so lucky to have grown up there and be exposed to all the art, music and theatre that shaped my life forever estory