The Trump Backed Whale
a tale of a whale56 total reviews
Comment from LIJ Red
Once there was a carp who thought he was a whale-nah, I won't go there.
Good art and excellent rhymes. I hope that Sixth Extinction they talk so much about don't get our whales...
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2017
  |
Once there was a carp who thought he was a whale-nah, I won't go there.
Good art and excellent rhymes. I hope that Sixth Extinction they talk so much about don't get our whales...
Comment Written 02-Dec-2017
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2017
-
Thanks I hope the whales survive too. They're so much smarter than we are. You don't see them destroying their environment.
Comment from Intrepid Crab
I have to admit, I am not much into poetry, but this is delightful! Thank you so much for your wonderful sense of humor and ability to put it into such prose.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
|
I have to admit, I am not much into poetry, but this is delightful! Thank you so much for your wonderful sense of humor and ability to put it into such prose.
Comment Written 04-Aug-2017
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2017
-
Thanks. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from tfawcus
He's enough to make one blubber, isn't he? A nice little political satire here with just the right edge of humour to accentuate the absurdities that your poem exposes.
Delivered with typical Canadian bravery, without regard to any future consequences! LOL
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
|
He's enough to make one blubber, isn't he? A nice little political satire here with just the right edge of humour to accentuate the absurdities that your poem exposes.
Delivered with typical Canadian bravery, without regard to any future consequences! LOL
Comment Written 05-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
-
Thanks. But oh, there were concequences! Not everyone found this funny! Thanks for a great review.
Comment from Gloria ....
Uh oh! President Trump isn't after me, the Canadian poet is he? Weeeeeeeeeee, that might even be good news because then I would become famous.
Lots of fun Cindy. I've been following Donald Trump for over 35 years so he's like family to me. In fact one of my zanier character's name is --Dodie Donald Trump. The one he doesn't know about. lol. You know, don't ask, don't tell.
Great job.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
|
Uh oh! President Trump isn't after me, the Canadian poet is he? Weeeeeeeeeee, that might even be good news because then I would become famous.
Lots of fun Cindy. I've been following Donald Trump for over 35 years so he's like family to me. In fact one of my zanier character's name is --Dodie Donald Trump. The one he doesn't know about. lol. You know, don't ask, don't tell.
Great job.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
-
Who knows, he might make Canadian poets famous. LOL Thanks for a fun review.
Comment from Ann Philips
The satirical treatment of Trump as a candidate is effective.
I really enjoyed this line: "A clever ol' whale who could spin quite a tale". It is playful, effective and well constructed.
There were spots where I thought the wording became awkward and forced a little. For example: "determined he must be the winner" ( I thought "determined" sounds a little off); and, " And all in the oceans and seas" ( again there is an awkwardness in this line that may relate to syllable count).
Good luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
 |
The satirical treatment of Trump as a candidate is effective.
I really enjoyed this line: "A clever ol' whale who could spin quite a tale". It is playful, effective and well constructed.
There were spots where I thought the wording became awkward and forced a little. For example: "determined he must be the winner" ( I thought "determined" sounds a little off); and, " And all in the oceans and seas" ( again there is an awkwardness in this line that may relate to syllable count).
Good luck in the competition.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2017
-
Thanks. I'll take another look at that line.
Comment from nancyrabbrose
Your poem deserves 6 stars for its craftiness and for its content. You did a brilliant job. I like the way you carried the metaphor all the way. Congratulations.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
 |
Your poem deserves 6 stars for its craftiness and for its content. You did a brilliant job. I like the way you carried the metaphor all the way. Congratulations.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
-
Thanks. I'm so glad you loved it. Not everybody thought it was funny. I really appreciate the six.
Comment from Gianinas
The rhyme and rhythm kept my attention and focus from the beginning to the end of this satirical piece. I recognized the Pacific though, and the tail of a whale pictured from somewhere in Kawaii.
Coincidences...
Gianina
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
|
The rhyme and rhythm kept my attention and focus from the beginning to the end of this satirical piece. I recognized the Pacific though, and the tail of a whale pictured from somewhere in Kawaii.
Coincidences...
Gianina
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
-
Thanks. That's interesting. I found the picture on FanArt. I had no idea where it was. Glad you liked my poem.
Comment from rjuselius
haha. lol. your notes tell the whole story and makes the entire thing so damn laughable! a compelling, indeed ingenious and original and clever!
thank you fro the laugh!
blessings!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
|
haha. lol. your notes tell the whole story and makes the entire thing so damn laughable! a compelling, indeed ingenious and original and clever!
thank you fro the laugh!
blessings!
rebekka x
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
-
Thanks! I really appreciate the positive feedback. Not everybody thought it was funny. Glad it made you laugh. Thanks again for the six.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
So the reef's still in place, as of yet there's no wall
Breath held to see if the whale has the gall to build it at all.
Now there's a human in trouble 'cause wouldn't you know it
For his next meal his mind's set on a Canadian poet. '
This is superbly clever and the last stanza made me smile well done love Meia x
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
|
So the reef's still in place, as of yet there's no wall
Breath held to see if the whale has the gall to build it at all.
Now there's a human in trouble 'cause wouldn't you know it
For his next meal his mind's set on a Canadian poet. '
This is superbly clever and the last stanza made me smile well done love Meia x
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
-
Thanks for the wonderfully positive review. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from dominador G Robles
I am thrilled by the beauty of this poem. It looks like it is following the pattern of the poem, "The Clown..." Good for the contest. It is excellent in rhyme and rhythm. And I felt comfortable in reading it from beginning to end. I did not see anything to suggest.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
|
I am thrilled by the beauty of this poem. It looks like it is following the pattern of the poem, "The Clown..." Good for the contest. It is excellent in rhyme and rhythm. And I felt comfortable in reading it from beginning to end. I did not see anything to suggest.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2017
-
Wow, thanks for the six. I'm thrilled you liked it so much.