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Miscellaneous Poems Vol 2

Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Tragedy at St. Matthew's"
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17 total reviews 
Comment from --Turtle.
Excellent
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Hi, Craig...
I figure I might be missing your blind contest writings... and peeked in your portfolio, more for enjoyment than deep contemplation. This story in a poem leading to a punchline entertained me, and I didn't really pause.

did not know his ding from his dong.
(I got a solid chuckle here... very amusing)

"I'm sorry(,) sir, I was not privy to that,
(cause I can't help myself... that direct addressment comma)

but I'm certain his face rang a bell."
(Ha! punny... a nice spin on using the idiom ring a bell)

 Comment Written 21-May-2017


reply by the author on 21-May-2017
    Hi Turtle,

    I don't think you've missed much. This was my first member-sponsored contest since I got back, although I have done entries for a couple of site ones.

    Thanks for reviewing. I'm glad it gave you a chuckle.

    Craig
Comment from BeasPeas
Excellent
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This is indeed a shaggy dog story, although I wasn't quite sure what one was until I read a few entries. Yours is the cleverest because it's humorous and makes some semblance of sense. Good job. I enjoyed reading it. Marilyn

 Comment Written 17-May-2017


reply by the author on 17-May-2017
    Thank you for the kind comments - I'm glad you found it funny :)
Comment from Rasmine
Excellent
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Well, I don't see any copying. There are people who will look for the nitty gritty and then blow it out of proportion. If it's unknown and a very old joke, I think that it is up for grabs. law I think gives the public access if the writer is dead or it's over 100 years, not sure on that.

 Comment Written 11-May-2017


reply by the author on 11-May-2017
    I have based poems before on stories and folklore that I didn't invent, as have a great many poets - I don't think anything is wrong with that. Apparently some do, so to be totally open, I put in a note about it. It's not an apology. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
reply by Rasmine on 11-May-2017
    I know, I saw that. We can write poems based on other stories and stuff. You did well. :)
reply by the author on 11-May-2017
    Thanks :)
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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Hahahaha!
OMG, if this does not win the contest then there is simply no justice in contests here at FanStory at all, which I am beginning to suspect is the case anyhow.
It's wonderfully well rhymed, well told, and simply hilarious.

I wish I had a six left to award you for your outstanding achievement here.
I can do one thing for you, however. I can be sure to vote for you come time to vote.

"His face rang a bell..." Priceless, heh-heh...
 photo cooltext210450993103317_zpsnaocmzmr.png

 Comment Written 11-May-2017


reply by the author on 11-May-2017
    Thanks so much for the lovely comments, Dean. I'm glad it gave you a laugh :)
reply by Dean Kuch on 11-May-2017
    You're very welcome. :)
Comment from Nikki-Nicole
Excellent
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VERY GOOD poem.
It tells a good story and has rhyme.
Best of luck to you in the contest.
Thanks for sharing your Shaggy Dog Poetry.
Good luck with your future writing.
-Nicole-

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    Thanks very much for the kind review and good wishes.
Comment from ~Dovey
Excellent
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All of that for... the punchline... wait for it... "his face rang a bell" lol
I didn't count the words, but I'm sure you must have to be contest compliant. You did a great job of writing a ramble in loose abcb rhyme over several stanzas all to come up with that punchline. I tripped a couple of times reading through the stanzas, but I think that it was more because I wanted it to be abab rhyme instead. The stanzas I enjoyed the most told of Hope and Michael and even included some internal rhyme.

Thanks for sharing, I had a laugh!

Good luck in the contest!

Kim

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    Loose rhyme? It's the accent, I tell you. When are you going to lose it? Glad it gave you a laugh, and thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Excellent
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Very funny through out. I've heard the joke before, but not in poetic form. Good job. But ge real, who can rhyme anything with Strathclyde?

I applaud you.

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    Thanks very much for the great review. I'm working on rhyming something with "orange" for my next one.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
Excellent
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A very well-written Shaggy Dog Poem. The poor bell-ringer died and can't be replaced. The only one that came close to replace the original bell-ringer had a terrible accident. Maybe the church should modernize and get an electric bell-ringer.

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    I suppose they should get rid of the pipe organ too? Heaven forbid! Thank you for your review, much appreciated.
Comment from JanPerry
Excellent
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The timing follows that of a limerick, it has several in fact. I enjoy the humour, it sounds professional. Is it a copy?
It looks like there is no one sane enough to do the job! Good fun on every line.

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    The story of the bell ringer, and the punch line, are a popular shaggy dog tale. To my knowledge, it hasn't been presented as a poem before, and the details - like the other people in the story, I made up. Thanks for reviewing.
reply by JanPerry on 10-May-2017
    oh, so it's a story and you turned it into a poem? A novel idea.
reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    Thanks for the lovely compliment - but it's not really all that novel. Pretty much any work of art is telling or retelling a story, whether it be true, fiction or legend. A bit like Banjo wrote the Man From Snowy River based on a story. Or they made a movie for Bill Murray about a story of a groundhog. So my taking 5 words and turning them into a 400 word story in a poem isn't really all that unusual.
Comment from Hitcher
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Ha ha, now that my friend was funny, still laughing : ) so I guess you could say you did a fine job, except I didn't think it was too long or longer than necessary. I think you did a awesome job of the length and the quality. A contender for sure in my book. Loved it!!

 Comment Written 10-May-2017


reply by the author on 10-May-2017
    Thanks so much for the lovely review, and the generous six stars! Glad it gave you a chuckle :)