Mar-Bear Versus the Volcano Pt 1
What's black & blue and sports a concussion? Not Brunhilda!17 total reviews
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
This really tickled my funny bone as I pictured it all unfolding, Mary! This is a terrific write. I love it all. Special highlights for this reader are:
- "She deducted points on my landing for nearly causing her brain damage" ... haha! Love how you have Bruni talking like she's a 'real' person.
- "second'd and third'd" ... cute!
- the whole paragraph about the 'Village People' cracked me up. That was my favorite part of the story.
- "Mr. Tai Mai, Mr. Mai Tai, Mr. High Tide" ... very funny.
Love the artwork too! :) Great job on this write, Mary!
Connie
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
  |
This really tickled my funny bone as I pictured it all unfolding, Mary! This is a terrific write. I love it all. Special highlights for this reader are:
- "She deducted points on my landing for nearly causing her brain damage" ... haha! Love how you have Bruni talking like she's a 'real' person.
- "second'd and third'd" ... cute!
- the whole paragraph about the 'Village People' cracked me up. That was my favorite part of the story.
- "Mr. Tai Mai, Mr. Mai Tai, Mr. High Tide" ... very funny.
Love the artwork too! :) Great job on this write, Mary!
Connie
Comment Written 12-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 12-Mar-2017
-
What another great review, Connie. Thank you so much for the read, review, and for letting me know you favorite parts. I hope to get the next chapter up today. Fingers crossed! Have a fantastic week ahead! XO
Comment from emptypage
Hahaha... I think you might be a tad crazy, Mary Wakeford. But I'd be happy to be crazy if I could get to Hawaii ONCE!
I love Bruni, as usual. She is my kind of alter-ego.
It sounds fun. I mean ukulele lessons are awesome! And a magician! But I haven't quite figured out what this biking event is that is going to kill you. I hope to figure it out in part 2.
Is this supposed to be two sentences?
Our son-in-law's father is a Pro-planner as well as a non-idler to the degree a month before launch, our 2014 Maui trip was filled with action-packed adventures--a few beginning prior to the sun waking up.
Because without a period, say, after "degree," I cannot understand this line.
Evanovich is too fun!
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2017
 |
Hahaha... I think you might be a tad crazy, Mary Wakeford. But I'd be happy to be crazy if I could get to Hawaii ONCE!
I love Bruni, as usual. She is my kind of alter-ego.
It sounds fun. I mean ukulele lessons are awesome! And a magician! But I haven't quite figured out what this biking event is that is going to kill you. I hope to figure it out in part 2.
Is this supposed to be two sentences?
Our son-in-law's father is a Pro-planner as well as a non-idler to the degree a month before launch, our 2014 Maui trip was filled with action-packed adventures--a few beginning prior to the sun waking up.
Because without a period, say, after "degree," I cannot understand this line.
Evanovich is too fun!
Comment Written 11-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2017
-
Good call on the degree...I just switched the entire sentence up a bit. Let me know what you think if you get a chance.
Tad crazy, Me???? Nah! Love Evanovich!! I hear Sue Grafton is a really good read too...I've never read her though so can't say for sure.
Why the hell are we up so late?
-
Because we're really sick and afraid of dying so our thoughts keep racing and legs keep moving... Why are WE awake so late?
Do you like Sue Monk Kidd or Ann Patchett??
Comment from doggymad
Hi Mary, I see that your pal certainly has a way of taking over. She comes up with bizarre plans for you and you tag along like the soft person you are.
I must say I enjoy her antics
hugs
Freda
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
Hi Mary, I see that your pal certainly has a way of taking over. She comes up with bizarre plans for you and you tag along like the soft person you are.
I must say I enjoy her antics
hugs
Freda
Comment Written 10-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
Hi Freda! Thank you for your great review and comments. Bruni is a bitch with emphasis on the capital B! I appreciate your time and review. Part 2 should hopefully be up tomorrow :D
Comment from Sixty70
Goodness! No way would I ever, ever in a million years, bike ride down into a volcano with turns. I'm with Brunhilda. My husband bought me a bike last year and, having not ridden a bike since high school (back 50 years ago) I made him find adult training wheels. I'm always hoping for bad weather as an excuse.
Can't wait to see how the ride turns out.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
Goodness! No way would I ever, ever in a million years, bike ride down into a volcano with turns. I'm with Brunhilda. My husband bought me a bike last year and, having not ridden a bike since high school (back 50 years ago) I made him find adult training wheels. I'm always hoping for bad weather as an excuse.
Can't wait to see how the ride turns out.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
Hello, and thank you for your wonderful review and rating. I understand the training wheel request, though I don't think they would have even saved me on this one. I hope to have part 2 posted tomorrow :D Have a great weekend!
Comment from Mark Valentine
Dawn told me I needed to check out your writing - I'm so glad I did. This is hilarious and superbly written (wish I had a six!) You had me at the thumb and forefinger to the forehead, and the chuckle broke into a full-fledged laugh with "it didn't appear duct tape was keeping anything in lockdown" As you might say - Foooooking brilliant!
You have a new fan and I look forward to reading more.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
Dawn told me I needed to check out your writing - I'm so glad I did. This is hilarious and superbly written (wish I had a six!) You had me at the thumb and forefinger to the forehead, and the chuckle broke into a full-fledged laugh with "it didn't appear duct tape was keeping anything in lockdown" As you might say - Foooooking brilliant!
You have a new fan and I look forward to reading more.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
Sweet Dawn, she always has my back. Thank you so much for letting me know, and for the review. I get a sense in the year that I've been on FanStory, prose writers are the red headed step-children. I barely squeak out enough for the 15 review ribbon. I appreciate very much your feedback, and follow! I loved your Ern piece that I read this morning. Still thinking about it! It was amazing.
Comment from Dawn Munro
HAHAHAHAHA _ "...suggested we slip her some wine and revisit the conversation twenty minutes later." HAHAHAHAHA.
The next paragraph is as hilarious! Bruni sure can yell! LOL.
Sorry - tell you on FB why this is so short. Foooook. LOL.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
HAHAHAHAHA _ "...suggested we slip her some wine and revisit the conversation twenty minutes later." HAHAHAHAHA.
The next paragraph is as hilarious! Bruni sure can yell! LOL.
Sorry - tell you on FB why this is so short. Foooook. LOL.
Comment Written 10-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
LOL. LOL. LOL. You Keeeeeeeeeee'L me! Thank you for the review, Dawn! So very appreciated. Have a great weekend!
-
:) You too.
Comment from MelB
I struggled to the car on bowed legs one could have driven a clown car through. - LOL
I have horses and do suggest a sports bra for those more well built gals. I enjoyed reading and as usual, you made me smile.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
I struggled to the car on bowed legs one could have driven a clown car through. - LOL
I have horses and do suggest a sports bra for those more well built gals. I enjoyed reading and as usual, you made me smile.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
Hi Melissa, thank you so much for the wonderful review. I didn't pack a single sports bra for that trip, next time I will know better :D I appreciate your continued interest and reviews. Hope you are doing well. It is such a difficult time of life when we lose our mothers.
Comment from damommy
I have a feeling this isn't going to end well.
Maybe you should listen to Brunhilda more. LOL.
As always, I enjoyed your story and look forward to the rest of it. 8-)
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
I have a feeling this isn't going to end well.
Maybe you should listen to Brunhilda more. LOL.
As always, I enjoyed your story and look forward to the rest of it. 8-)
Comment Written 09-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
You are intuitive! THank you, Yvonne, for your RR&R. I hope to get chapter 2 posted tomorrow if my household leaves me to be for a few hours...Have a great weekend!
Comment from Sasha
I was never a lover of Maui, I am older and prefer the tranquility of Kauai. Bunhilda is is great form in this one and I have to side with her. I would have preferred losing the money than sliding into a live volcano. I cannot wait to find out how well the adventure went. I look forward to the next post.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
|
I was never a lover of Maui, I am older and prefer the tranquility of Kauai. Bunhilda is is great form in this one and I have to side with her. I would have preferred losing the money than sliding into a live volcano. I cannot wait to find out how well the adventure went. I look forward to the next post.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
-
Hi Sasha, isn't that funny. I have a good friend who feels just as you. I loved Maui and can't wait to go back and take on the volcano again and beat the shit out of it instead of the other way around! Have a great weekend, hope you are feeling better!
Comment from Heidi M
What a great job you did on this! This part, in particular, was hysterical: 'I resembled the guy in first position of Village People performing Y.M.C.A. after de-horsing. My "Y" just happened to be upside down.'
I can SO relate to your upcoming crash. I had a 'little' incident involving a 4-wheeler in the mountains of Idaho. Traffic was stopped, gawking...Fortunately, a boulder and a tree stopped my trip down the side of a mountain.
Looking forward to reading more of your adventure.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2017
|
What a great job you did on this! This part, in particular, was hysterical: 'I resembled the guy in first position of Village People performing Y.M.C.A. after de-horsing. My "Y" just happened to be upside down.'
I can SO relate to your upcoming crash. I had a 'little' incident involving a 4-wheeler in the mountains of Idaho. Traffic was stopped, gawking...Fortunately, a boulder and a tree stopped my trip down the side of a mountain.
Looking forward to reading more of your adventure.
Comment Written 09-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2017
-
Ah, Heidi. No errors noted and a six to boot! My week is made :D Thank you so much for your wonderful assessment and your crash sounds as terrifying. I'm so glad a tree was there to save the day. We recently had a former olympic champion out four-wheeling with her husband, hit a curb and ended up severing her spinal column. She is in a wheel chair. So tragic. I hope to have the next part up by tomorrow :D
By the way, I finally learned how to upload from Word onto FanStory, so hopefully that will cut down on some of my errors ;D This was my first story that posted from Word.
