Comment from Pearl Edwards

Exceptional

did I mention I had a hurt a feeling a need
those words just call out in another very emotion filled free verse mikey. Sometimes when we are down, but not out is when we can write out our hurts and frustrations (I do anyway) but for whatever the reason, this is a great write.
Loved it,
cheers,
valda

 Comment Written 05-Feb-2017

Comment from rama devi

Excellent

Wow--this is one of your most powerful poems, Mikey. Sorry I missed it but glad I checked your profile today. I saw some poems implying you've left or are leaving. Is that the case? I hope not. This is so deeply sad and poignant, it feels raw and real and has the most intense AHAS woven in it. The artwork at the end looks so intensely sad and lonely and hurt and afraid it made me want to cry for whoever created it. Your poem has that effect too, but it is tempered with a serene wisdom between the lines as well...that lucidity of honest feeling which brings clarity in consciousness somehow...and perspective as well, recalling how the "vastness shamelessly stretches out"

This is memorable:

but, sure, decry the small snickering orb
a pebble to us, a life altering mystery to you
personify us with meaning
poking holes in an alternate soul and
even
dare the pretense you are
part of it


Powerful:

you know I'm something more
than just a monolithic
surface to reflect
your every thought
and moistened dream
and lustful whim


Love this line:
I laugh at quarter moons

Love this too:
they're not half of what I am
and the stars are much more lonely
in the sky

Striking and impacting and wise too:

but no matter how they
chase in desperate need
they won't get nearer
than they are
they'll stay as far
away until the day the
last atom flickers out
and there's no doubt

Optional suggestion:

I'll be there watching(,) and that's
more attention paid
than will
be
bestowed on
me


not sure why this end line comma is here, especially since they are not used elsewhere and this one is not required:

I see my face,
reflected in the still water

Suggest:

I see my face
reflected in the still water

Powerful tone and imagery:

a forlorn vacant stare
a tear gets a reaction
as the water ripples
towards the edges
of infinity

Potent closing note--mortality summed up:

but
I
do not


Wish I had a six.

Bravo

Love, Light and healing thoughts,
rd

 Comment Written 04-Feb-2017

Comment from brenda bickers

Excellent

Hi Mikey,
this is a very deep and meaningful poem. It is strange how we do our thinking and pondering when look at the universe. I like your descriptions and the way you
bring out attention to all that goes on out there, and yet nothing changes.
A great read.
Brenda.

Mikey I have you down as a fan but I am not being notified when you post anything like I used to. Do you know how I can change that?

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2017

Comment from RobertaLee

Excellent

For free verse poetry this is well presented although I am not appreciative personally of the font devices used, nor the affectations. For this reviewer those things remove the sincerity of emotion that is attempting to be expressed.
Grammatically it should be "toward (not towards) the edges.."
Thank you.

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2017