The Amazing Heist
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Assignments"A team of six plan their final heist.
7 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
She certainly is a perfect leader but this is a big order, I find myself cheering for the criminals. I hope this isn't their undoing:
"Big enough for all of us and the money we lift. " It's great how they are bonding. We now wonder.
reply by the author on 04-May-2022
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She certainly is a perfect leader but this is a big order, I find myself cheering for the criminals. I hope this isn't their undoing:
"Big enough for all of us and the money we lift. " It's great how they are bonding. We now wonder.
Comment Written 03-May-2022
reply by the author on 04-May-2022
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Thank you so much Liz for reviewing and your amazing comments.
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Hugs
Comment from lyenochka
This seems to be a great group of people who work well together. The specific assignments show the expertise of each member. And to show how well they worked together, even the generous provision of lunch turned the meeting into a well oiled machine where everyone contributed to make the lunch ready in no time! This bodes well for their project.
Suggestions:
Freddie announce that he and (announced)
It, actually became an assembly line. (no comma after It)
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2022
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This seems to be a great group of people who work well together. The specific assignments show the expertise of each member. And to show how well they worked together, even the generous provision of lunch turned the meeting into a well oiled machine where everyone contributed to make the lunch ready in no time! This bodes well for their project.
Suggestions:
Freddie announce that he and (announced)
It, actually became an assembly line. (no comma after It)
Comment Written 05-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2022
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Thank you so much Helene for reviewing and your amazing comments, I will fix those in a moment.
Comment from Pantygynt
These very human crooks who actually cook, eat and have proper human attributes but are indeed bent on taking what is not theirs to take, start their preparations for the coming heist. Abby is the leader and undoubtedly the most intelligent of the bunch. I get the feeling they would all have been safely locked away by now were it not for her attention to detail.
This is a great way to tell the story, releasing just a little soupcon of plot as an hors d'oeuvre before getting back into the kitchen.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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These very human crooks who actually cook, eat and have proper human attributes but are indeed bent on taking what is not theirs to take, start their preparations for the coming heist. Abby is the leader and undoubtedly the most intelligent of the bunch. I get the feeling they would all have been safely locked away by now were it not for her attention to detail.
This is a great way to tell the story, releasing just a little soupcon of plot as an hors d'oeuvre before getting back into the kitchen.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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I am so glad that they come across as domesticated crooks (laughing) I have a tendency to like to get to know the real person as well as what they think they want you to see. Hey hors d'oeuvres are actually rather tastely lol. Thanks so much.
Comment from Mabaker
Great chapter Alie. Here we are meeting thhe 'person' behind the names. Having them eating normal food as apossed to 'take aways' was a clever idea, makes them real. Keep it coming I'm still with you. Love U Anne.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Great chapter Alie. Here we are meeting thhe 'person' behind the names. Having them eating normal food as apossed to 'take aways' was a clever idea, makes them real. Keep it coming I'm still with you. Love U Anne.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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I am so glad I haven't lost you; just teasing with you about me keeping it coming. I am super glad you are enjoying it. As long as the brain cells work I will continue. I actually have it plotted out. Luv U Alie.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Yes, my curiosity is peeked too! What is her plan for Paul? It sounds like a pretty dangerous robbery, I hope she really has worked it out, I've got to like them now and don't want to see them fail. Another excellent part, Alie, you are doing really well!! :) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Yes, my curiosity is peeked too! What is her plan for Paul? It sounds like a pretty dangerous robbery, I hope she really has worked it out, I've got to like them now and don't want to see them fail. Another excellent part, Alie, you are doing really well!! :) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 02-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Thank you Sandra, you are truly making my day. Glad you are enjoying it. Failure is not an option lol.
Comment from royowen
Well done, I rather like the ease with which you write this, the lighthearted approach, gives a good, light read to the reviewing reader, a rather pleasant experience, relatable characters and plot. Well done, blessings, Roy
Type : retirement (for) a life of crime. From? a (mixmash) micmasc? A biblical town in Palestine. 7 miles north east of Jerusalem. 2: zero in on no more than (number) five truck(s).3. Freddie announce(d) that he...
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Well done, I rather like the ease with which you write this, the lighthearted approach, gives a good, light read to the reviewing reader, a rather pleasant experience, relatable characters and plot. Well done, blessings, Roy
Type : retirement (for) a life of crime. From? a (mixmash) micmasc? A biblical town in Palestine. 7 miles north east of Jerusalem. 2: zero in on no more than (number) five truck(s).3. Freddie announce(d) that he...
Comment Written 02-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Thanks Roy I am glad you are enjoying it, and I really appreciate your kind comments, they make my day and inspire me to carry on. The corrections will be within a few minutes, they too are well appreciated.
Comment from Sixty70
This is a very interesting group. I like Abby's take charge attitude. I just wonder about the wisdom of spending more time planning the potluck than the heist.
One thing that may help is to check out police procedurals - either fiction or fact, I don't think it makes a difference. Once a heist like this occurs, what steps do the police take to investigate it? Working backwards might give you some insight into Abby's task.
A couple of nits:
"Zero in on no more than five truck." I think you missed the 's', trucks.
"As time lapses..." I've never heard this before. Is it idiomatic? I've heard, 'as time passes...' A lapse is something else?
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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This is a very interesting group. I like Abby's take charge attitude. I just wonder about the wisdom of spending more time planning the potluck than the heist.
One thing that may help is to check out police procedurals - either fiction or fact, I don't think it makes a difference. Once a heist like this occurs, what steps do the police take to investigate it? Working backwards might give you some insight into Abby's task.
A couple of nits:
"Zero in on no more than five truck." I think you missed the 's', trucks.
"As time lapses..." I've never heard this before. Is it idiomatic? I've heard, 'as time passes...' A lapse is something else?
Comment Written 02-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
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Wow, this is great, you have so many creative ideas and suggestions, corrections will be forth coming. I was thinking that the potluck needed to be there because Paul and Freddie's wives have no idea about what they really do and this was a distraction. I really like the idea about the police. Thanks. Are you sure you haven't had a life of crime in a past life? LOL
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I'm glad you're happy to have some suggestions.
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Oh I always appreciate the suggestions and corrections, this is all about not only entertaining each other but also helping and learning.
