Monorhyme. Free Verse?
From a skeptical woman's point of view.5 total reviews
Comment from samandlancelot
Ogden/Don,
Your title was confusing because I thought free verse was without rhymes. I like your clarification that freedom gives the right to choose to rhyme or not.
Then I love your picture of all the lost rhyme words we had to lose in order to move on to the next line.
So many great rhyme words - changteuse, schmooze, rendezvous. . .
I love your finale with all the internal rhymes. You captured the monorhyme form superbly (is that the correct usage of that word? I don't know, but that's my chosen word. I had to "lose" all other word choices to get my chosen message to you.)
Patricia
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Ogden/Don,
Your title was confusing because I thought free verse was without rhymes. I like your clarification that freedom gives the right to choose to rhyme or not.
Then I love your picture of all the lost rhyme words we had to lose in order to move on to the next line.
So many great rhyme words - changteuse, schmooze, rendezvous. . .
I love your finale with all the internal rhymes. You captured the monorhyme form superbly (is that the correct usage of that word? I don't know, but that's my chosen word. I had to "lose" all other word choices to get my chosen message to you.)
Patricia
Comment Written 11-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Thanks for your terrific review, funny lady! (It's unfair, you know, that you know both of my names, and yours is anonymous. Come out, whoever you are!)
Have a healthy, happy holiday season!
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I am samandlancelot (cat names), real name is Patricia
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I'm pleased to meet you, Patricia!
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Pleased to meet you too, Don, even if I do dislike the etiquette protocol I used in that statement.
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You have me a bit confused, Patricia. What protocol did you use? And why did you use it?
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"pleased to meet you too" protocol. I am very polite and say what I'm supposed to say. Even though I'm glad to meet you, I think it is boring and it keeps my personality hidden to say the words I'm supposed to say. I'm trying to work through that.
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Okay, scratch "Pleased to meet you, too." What do you really mean? ;-) (< wink)
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LOL And I really did laugh out loud, I'm not just saying that for protocol.
Comment from cumulus365
This is brilliant use of oos rhyming in this piece. I like how you could fit in chanteuse and adieu in. Very clever with how the feminine thinks of noisy men snorers. Haven't use my college French in years, but I used to love to say "bonne chance!" Je dis bonne chance et vous avez mon vote. cloudy.
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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This is brilliant use of oos rhyming in this piece. I like how you could fit in chanteuse and adieu in. Very clever with how the feminine thinks of noisy men snorers. Haven't use my college French in years, but I used to love to say "bonne chance!" Je dis bonne chance et vous avez mon vote. cloudy.
Comment Written 11-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Merci Beaucoup! (That and adieu and chanteuse are the limit of my French, Cloudy.) It's very rewarding when someone really appreciates your work, or, in this case, My work! And those stunning six stars surely sweeten those sentiments!!.
Thanks again!!
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de rein. cumulus (I think I like la nuage blanc).
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De rein?? I don't know much French, but I think nuage blanc means "white cloud." You sign as "Cloudy." Do you mean that you prefer to be called White Cloud? Or should I say, What does your message mean? :o)
Don
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Before I forget on this one. Ogen, you are correct, just address my pen name cumulus ok to make it easy on you and me. Thanks again for your thinking my review worth your vote. No more confusion. Thanks again.
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Sure. (The "cloudy" misled me.)
Comment from PoemsOfDD
Don, I'm sure you had fun writing this mono rhyme poem. I've got my fingers crossed for you in the contest. Good luck. ~DD
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2016
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Don, I'm sure you had fun writing this mono rhyme poem. I've got my fingers crossed for you in the contest. Good luck. ~DD
Comment Written 09-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2016
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Yes, It was fun. I try to have fun with everything I do, Sometimes it's necessary to put my tongue in a cheek.
G'day!
Don
Comment from rspoet
Hello Don,
A mono-rhyme that actually makes sense
like free verse, unrehearsed
fusion or confusion
free form or deformed
you're pushing the boundaries
and pulling on safty pins
But you followed the prompt
which said to have fun
And I, for one, had fun reading, well done
I only wish I had a six
but best wishes in the mono-contest
RS
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2016
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Hello Don,
A mono-rhyme that actually makes sense
like free verse, unrehearsed
fusion or confusion
free form or deformed
you're pushing the boundaries
and pulling on safty pins
But you followed the prompt
which said to have fun
And I, for one, had fun reading, well done
I only wish I had a six
but best wishes in the mono-contest
RS
Comment Written 09-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 10-Dec-2016
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Thank you for your review, RS! I think this rhyming thing has become contagious; but don't worry, you'll get over it.
Don
Comment from aryr
Wow this must have been a challenge to have each line rhyme, but you did a great job. It was interesting and entertaining reading and rather enjoyable. Great job, thank you.
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Wow this must have been a challenge to have each line rhyme, but you did a great job. It was interesting and entertaining reading and rather enjoyable. Great job, thank you.
Comment Written 09-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Thanks again, Aryr! Yes, it was challenging, and much fun to write. I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
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You are very welcome