This Aching Abyss
The silence is overwhelming...65 total reviews
Comment from WriteSins!
Wow. Simply wow. An absolutely fabulous poem that perfectly captures the false sense of security that one can feel since they have gotten so used to something, such as an abusive relationship. People stop fearing for their current dangerous situation and fear leaving the familiarity of their situation. Because it's what they know. Fantastic work, Dean!
  |
Wow. Simply wow. An absolutely fabulous poem that perfectly captures the false sense of security that one can feel since they have gotten so used to something, such as an abusive relationship. People stop fearing for their current dangerous situation and fear leaving the familiarity of their situation. Because it's what they know. Fantastic work, Dean!
Comment Written 03-Dec-2016
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Dare I look back
Dare I dream
A very emotional write this one Dean, and beautifully presented, as always you make it a pleasure to read and re-read your words. Love this, great job.
cheers,
valda
|
Dare I look back
Dare I dream
A very emotional write this one Dean, and beautifully presented, as always you make it a pleasure to read and re-read your words. Love this, great job.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 30-Nov-2016
Comment from Unspoken94
Another incredible creation of your talent of
putting together our senses. Sight and sound
and even the heart is built into this project.
It's amazing how you bring out our emotions
with your creations. To call this a poem is mistake.
-Bill
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
|
Another incredible creation of your talent of
putting together our senses. Sight and sound
and even the heart is built into this project.
It's amazing how you bring out our emotions
with your creations. To call this a poem is mistake.
-Bill
Comment Written 29-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
-
Thanks a million, Bill.
That's very thoughtful of you to say, my friend.
This is written about those spirits/souls who fall between the "cracks" of reality and existence.
Having said that, the word, "no"-"thing" is actually a misnomer. It is a "thing"...a NO thing. So, to feel NO thing is feeling at least something.
That was the idea anyhow.
Take care, and enjoy the upcoming weekend.
Thanks again for reading, Bill, and for the six.
~Dean
Comment from TallySally
Your phrasing pulled me into the abyss with you.
The wording: No... I will not. I must not dream, love...live, or feel anything. When in hell without hope, feeling can only bring more pain. So well expressed.
As for your presentation - what can be said? No one does it better.
Relda
|
Your phrasing pulled me into the abyss with you.
The wording: No... I will not. I must not dream, love...live, or feel anything. When in hell without hope, feeling can only bring more pain. So well expressed.
As for your presentation - what can be said? No one does it better.
Relda
Comment Written 29-Nov-2016
Comment from Badger_29
Wow, profoundly shocking . You are the master of alliteration, using not only the first letter, but whole prefixes, as in tender tendencies. Your use of graphics is so subtle, that at first I thought I was seeing things. The idea of teardrop in the ocean filled me with an unquenchable sadness, a profound poetic improvement on a drop in the bucket. You never fail to evoke deep emotion, and you gently, persuasively coax the reader into comparing (my) own sadness with that of the writer. Well done. Blessings to you and yours this holiday season. Darren
|
Wow, profoundly shocking . You are the master of alliteration, using not only the first letter, but whole prefixes, as in tender tendencies. Your use of graphics is so subtle, that at first I thought I was seeing things. The idea of teardrop in the ocean filled me with an unquenchable sadness, a profound poetic improvement on a drop in the bucket. You never fail to evoke deep emotion, and you gently, persuasively coax the reader into comparing (my) own sadness with that of the writer. Well done. Blessings to you and yours this holiday season. Darren
Comment Written 29-Nov-2016
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, I know the feeling of falling into an abyss. I have been there. I enjoyed the flow of your thoughts in a free verse poem which I seldom see you write. Your use of strong imagery impresses itself on my imagination and memory, such as this stanza:
"Plaintive cries for help,
in concentration death camps,
filled to overflowing
with the starving,
the tortured;
persecuted...
...and downtrodden--"
I am reminded of someone who remains in an emotional cave because they are unable or unwilling to stand the light:
"It is much safer here,
much more serene
in the urgent underbelly
of dire desperation."
It is sad and devastating to fall to such levels of despair where the ache of the abyss is the only thing one feels.
Thank you, Dean, for sharing your exceptional talent again.
|
Yes, I know the feeling of falling into an abyss. I have been there. I enjoyed the flow of your thoughts in a free verse poem which I seldom see you write. Your use of strong imagery impresses itself on my imagination and memory, such as this stanza:
"Plaintive cries for help,
in concentration death camps,
filled to overflowing
with the starving,
the tortured;
persecuted...
...and downtrodden--"
I am reminded of someone who remains in an emotional cave because they are unable or unwilling to stand the light:
"It is much safer here,
much more serene
in the urgent underbelly
of dire desperation."
It is sad and devastating to fall to such levels of despair where the ache of the abyss is the only thing one feels.
Thank you, Dean, for sharing your exceptional talent again.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
Comment from Chris Patterson
Beautiful words, with textured layers that invite rereading (of which I'm not finished, but time to rate nonetheless). Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
 |
Beautiful words, with textured layers that invite rereading (of which I'm not finished, but time to rate nonetheless). Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
-
Thank you for taking an interest in my poetry and deciding to give this a shot, Chris.
I deeply appreciate the positive feedback.
Comment from sandy montgomery
Good free form. Fittingly dark and frightening. Your imagery was pefect for the mood you set. Your art was really inventive. My cpu is slow so it might not have been intentional but at one point the coal was falling as I read. Thank you for sharing your work.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
|
Good free form. Fittingly dark and frightening. Your imagery was pefect for the mood you set. Your art was really inventive. My cpu is slow so it might not have been intentional but at one point the coal was falling as I read. Thank you for sharing your work.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
-
Haha...an added bonus for you then, Sandy, LOL.
Thanks for reading.
~Dean
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Another great poem from the master. I've heard that one technique for controlling pain is to disassociate yourself from the source I think your poem speaks of the journey from pain to release.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
|
Another great poem from the master. I've heard that one technique for controlling pain is to disassociate yourself from the source I think your poem speaks of the journey from pain to release.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
-
Thank you for taking the time to grasp the meaning of what I was trying to convey here, Thomas.
It's one thing just to read something. It's something altogether different to take the time to read AND understand what you've read.
Take care, and thanks again,
~Dean
Comment from Ulla
Hi Dean, So you've taken the option of feeling nothing. After encountering so much suffering and punishment you've lost your soul and the ability to feel anything. And that is a safe haven. So sad, but true to many who have suffered and survived the ultimate deprivation. A poignant poem. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
|
Hi Dean, So you've taken the option of feeling nothing. After encountering so much suffering and punishment you've lost your soul and the ability to feel anything. And that is a safe haven. So sad, but true to many who have suffered and survived the ultimate deprivation. A poignant poem. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
-
Thank you for reading as well as understanding the emotions I was attempting to convey in this poem, Ulla.
I appreciate your positive response as well as the stellar rating.
Warmest wishes...
~Dean
