Comment from robyn corum

Good

So, in the first part, the nurse was lecturing the students? It didn't read that way. It read more like inner thoughts. I'm sorry, but it my take on it. The second one totally sounded like a student's inner thoughts. Great on that.

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2016

Robyn,

Sorry about the confusion. It is meant to be two totally different monologues from unrelated characters.

peter

Comment from frierajac

Excellent

both sound fine to me. The first reminds me of a nurse I lived with and her rant although hers was mainly against computers taking over. The teenager is convincing as well, although his speech seems jammed together, maybe that's just him

 Comment Written 02-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Nov-2016

Hi

Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate any encouragement.

Peter