How This Critter Crits
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Down and Out in San Antonio (Part 1)"GROWTH? ADULATION? HURRY -- CHOOSE!
44 total reviews
Comment from I am Cat
Having not used the classic version of Fanstory since 2013, i"m left to wonder if what I just transferred from the 'note box' up top even came down here... (I've no idea)...
I also just got this notion...
You're not talking about Marty Robbins, are you? LOL
I mean, that would put an entirely different spin on things, now wouldn't it? ;)
*smiles*
By the way, Lackland is still there. In case you're wondering. ;)
lol
Out on Loop 1604 and I10
At any rate, even if it's not Marty Robbins, I"m hooked and still here, and this is no different... i"ve no idea where my thoughts went though... somewhere in cyber space...
So I'm heading back to the newer version...
On to part two!
Cat
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2015
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Having not used the classic version of Fanstory since 2013, i"m left to wonder if what I just transferred from the 'note box' up top even came down here... (I've no idea)...
I also just got this notion...
You're not talking about Marty Robbins, are you? LOL
I mean, that would put an entirely different spin on things, now wouldn't it? ;)
*smiles*
By the way, Lackland is still there. In case you're wondering. ;)
lol
Out on Loop 1604 and I10
At any rate, even if it's not Marty Robbins, I"m hooked and still here, and this is no different... i"ve no idea where my thoughts went though... somewhere in cyber space...
So I'm heading back to the newer version...
On to part two!
Cat
Comment Written 03-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2015
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Thanks, Cat. I was afraid when I gave you the links you would think I was broadly hinting. I just didn't want to have you wad through lots of "The Critter Series" before getting to them.
No, there's Marty Robins, This Marty, and probably two others in the world.
LOL< Jay
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I know a Marty, but believe me... this might be a horror story if it were her! LOL
I appreciate the links, but I was enjoying the read anyway. ;) only slightly confused... but like I said, it's a state of life for me. LOL
Comment from sandragee
You hooked me with the line 'I wish I could remember how it all came about that Marty and I concocted such a harebrained idea to begin with.' I like the conversational tone of the piece as it prepares us for the story to follow, and I look forward to the next installment.
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2015
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You hooked me with the line 'I wish I could remember how it all came about that Marty and I concocted such a harebrained idea to begin with.' I like the conversational tone of the piece as it prepares us for the story to follow, and I look forward to the next installment.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2015
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Thank you, Sandra. I'm glad the tone of it brought you in. I think you'll like the story as it continues.
Comment from Tessa Kay
This one's very well written, with words I still have to look up to see what they mean (abstruse, obscurantist), which I don't know if it is a good thing, as it stopped my flow (but it may just be me not knowing those words).
You've got an interesting voice; reminded me a little of -- now I'm just like you with the general's name. It's about this college guy who leaves and reminisces about what happened in college while he's trying to get through a lonely night. Very famous novel. Can't for the life of me think of the title now -- (got the hang of those em-dashes...Thanks.) Either way. Your post sounds interesting and different, but I found myself wanting to skim towards the last third. There were so many side points, that I started wondering what it was about. And just when we came to it, it ended.
So I guess I'll have to read the next part. (Cleverly done)
-fancied ourselves as the kind of Three Musketeers. - do you need the 'kind of'? Doesn't seem to do much to the meaning of the sentence. Just my feeling.
-without as much as a howdy Musketeer - I like that expression. It's fresh.
:)
reply by Tessa Kay on 08-Sep-2015
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This one's very well written, with words I still have to look up to see what they mean (abstruse, obscurantist), which I don't know if it is a good thing, as it stopped my flow (but it may just be me not knowing those words).
You've got an interesting voice; reminded me a little of -- now I'm just like you with the general's name. It's about this college guy who leaves and reminisces about what happened in college while he's trying to get through a lonely night. Very famous novel. Can't for the life of me think of the title now -- (got the hang of those em-dashes...Thanks.) Either way. Your post sounds interesting and different, but I found myself wanting to skim towards the last third. There were so many side points, that I started wondering what it was about. And just when we came to it, it ended.
So I guess I'll have to read the next part. (Cleverly done)
-fancied ourselves as the kind of Three Musketeers. - do you need the 'kind of'? Doesn't seem to do much to the meaning of the sentence. Just my feeling.
-without as much as a howdy Musketeer - I like that expression. It's fresh.
:)
Comment Written 07-Sep-2015
reply by Tessa Kay on 08-Sep-2015
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I remembered today the novel your post reminded me of: 'The Catcher in the Rye'. Not a bad one to be compared with, is it?
:)
Comment from boxergirl
Hey Jay,
Sorry I am running late on my reviews...busy as a beaver, I guess. I did like the start of your story...you always capture my attention with your conversational tone and interesting side bars. I look forward to more. 8-)
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Hey Jay,
Sorry I am running late on my reviews...busy as a beaver, I guess. I did like the start of your story...you always capture my attention with your conversational tone and interesting side bars. I look forward to more. 8-)
Comment Written 06-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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THank you so much for reading it. Glad you enjoyed it. The next chapter comes later this week. Also have the next installment of "The Trining" on the first page, paying over a buck +. Karen, you are special. What busywork are you involved in?
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Family stuff mostly...my older brother has a lot of physical and mental health issues and I have been taking him to the VA hospital for doctor appointments.
I also maintain my home, yard, etc. I added some new landscaping this year so more upkeep. :-)
I am blessed to have good health and I spend time trying to maintain that. I work out regularly.
For fun, I play golf occasionally, if it's not too hot and I like playing my guitar and working on song lyrics.
Sorry I am rambling but you did ask. 8-)
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I did ask because I was interested, and you graced me with a banquet. You are a renaissance woman, with joy at the core of it all. I envy you.
Comment from justjo66
A very interesting story/memory. I made a trip to San Antonio in 1962 to Lackland Air base. My parents drove my grandmother and the three of "the
kids" (me and my two sisters) from Arlington, TX to visit my dad's sister. San Antonio was a lot
different then.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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A very interesting story/memory. I made a trip to San Antonio in 1962 to Lackland Air base. My parents drove my grandmother and the three of "the
kids" (me and my two sisters) from Arlington, TX to visit my dad's sister. San Antonio was a lot
different then.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Thank you, Jo. Glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Adri7enne
Well set up, Jay. We met your characters, got a feel for the mode of the time, and now we're ready for the story. I enjoyed your descriptions. You even got three pictures in the post. Well done, Jay.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Well set up, Jay. We met your characters, got a feel for the mode of the time, and now we're ready for the story. I enjoyed your descriptions. You even got three pictures in the post. Well done, Jay.
Comment Written 06-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Glad you enjoyed it, Adrienne. Thanks so much for the six stars.
Comment from scd41
It is an amusing story based on your version of Three Musketeers which has been narrated beautifully. I think the aptitude test that put you in Security Service was questionable as by no stretch of imagination, any person with Security Service background could ever be a good writer like you. Looking forward to reading your next entry
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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It is an amusing story based on your version of Three Musketeers which has been narrated beautifully. I think the aptitude test that put you in Security Service was questionable as by no stretch of imagination, any person with Security Service background could ever be a good writer like you. Looking forward to reading your next entry
Comment Written 06-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Ha! Security Service was in communications--the sending and receiving of classified information. Thanks for reading. Hope you stick around. My fantasy fiction is on Page one. Why not check it out?
Comment from --Turtle.
one of us into that closet.
(an interesting side painting of the Professor in relation to the painting of the rest of the scene. I'm not sure what to do with a post like this... informal posting. It's more of a relaxed tone, and reflective, and entertaining, informative-- looking at Jay looking back.
join the Air Force, he thought it was a grand idea.
(comma splice and I don't care, as this adds to the streaming flow tone of strolling memory lane... and yet, I still compulsively pointed out that I thought it was a comma splice.)
We joined together, we would go to tech schools together(,) and (we'd) travel the whole world as the Three Musketeers! (I thought this as a thought... don't bother changing it.)
year interim, we were discharged[,] and dumped back into Santa Maria.
(suggesting no comma for better flow)
enlistment on that base[,]? and spent a lot of time in San Antonio.
(I like your meandering thought flow back to this point. I think it should be called: Jay's scenic route to some point that lay ahead : D A whole new way to get lost on memory lane, and still keep a reader following behind absorbing bits and pieces)
It was Marty who asked me, ....
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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one of us into that closet.
(an interesting side painting of the Professor in relation to the painting of the rest of the scene. I'm not sure what to do with a post like this... informal posting. It's more of a relaxed tone, and reflective, and entertaining, informative-- looking at Jay looking back.
join the Air Force, he thought it was a grand idea.
(comma splice and I don't care, as this adds to the streaming flow tone of strolling memory lane... and yet, I still compulsively pointed out that I thought it was a comma splice.)
We joined together, we would go to tech schools together(,) and (we'd) travel the whole world as the Three Musketeers! (I thought this as a thought... don't bother changing it.)
year interim, we were discharged[,] and dumped back into Santa Maria.
(suggesting no comma for better flow)
enlistment on that base[,]? and spent a lot of time in San Antonio.
(I like your meandering thought flow back to this point. I think it should be called: Jay's scenic route to some point that lay ahead : D A whole new way to get lost on memory lane, and still keep a reader following behind absorbing bits and pieces)
It was Marty who asked me, ....
Comment Written 05-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Thanks, Turtle, for your loose interpretation of this. Glad you enjoyed it. Hope you have a chance to catch "The Trining" which is on Page one.
Comment from sibhus
Hmm, what does it sat that I know who General Jimmy Dolittle, and his drive to get aircraft carriers. This is a really interesting piece, I'm always fascinated by the memories of what now seems like a much simpler time. A time when Libya was thought of as an adventure, and not a possibly death threat. Good stuff there, Jay.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Hmm, what does it sat that I know who General Jimmy Dolittle, and his drive to get aircraft carriers. This is a really interesting piece, I'm always fascinated by the memories of what now seems like a much simpler time. A time when Libya was thought of as an adventure, and not a possibly death threat. Good stuff there, Jay.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Oh, don't think that hasn't crossed my mind about Libya today. Thanks, friend, for reading.
Comment from XGoneX
Hi Jay,
I enjoyed reading this entry of your blog. For some reason, I've always enjoyed to read personal memoirs and essays.
The writing class with an Irish professor must have been interesting. I have a few friends who are Irish. I always
So, you and your friend Marty and Jimmy are up for an adventure and lesson for life too, perhaps. I enjoyed the notion of the Three Musketeers.
Well done.
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Hi Jay,
I enjoyed reading this entry of your blog. For some reason, I've always enjoyed to read personal memoirs and essays.
The writing class with an Irish professor must have been interesting. I have a few friends who are Irish. I always
So, you and your friend Marty and Jimmy are up for an adventure and lesson for life too, perhaps. I enjoyed the notion of the Three Musketeers.
Well done.
Comment Written 05-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Glad to have you aboard, Jade. I enjoy writing memoirs as well.