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Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "ButterflyMan Slipped From Chrysalis"
GROWTH? ADULATION? HURRY -- CHOOSE!

37 total reviews 
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
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Hey, Jay. I want to know what happened to the 8 springtimes you missed if you're 73 and probably experienced sixty? Were you somewhere that didn't have spring? Come on, fess up mister.

Springtime conjures up in my mind rivulets on the road and getting to wear your shoes that click on the sidewalk rather than rubber boots.

I've never made a New Year's resolution, so I haven't a clue what those things really are.

You've got people? Pffftt. Lucky you.

Nifty preamble ButterflyMan. Now bring out the entree.

Gloria


 Comment Written 05-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 05-Aug-2015
    Thank you, Gloria. I probably need to reinforce what I said about children don't need their springtimes because it SHOULD always be springtime for them. Those 8 phantom years, I didn't really need.

    I was counting on you being one of my people. Pffft. Yes I am.

    Entree is in the works. I'm gonna do the last chapter of Scampers first.
Comment from Dawn Munro
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Hahahaha - I'd be delighted to "explore that" with you in Part II, providing the "old coot" continues to wax poetic. Jay, your command of language is so masterful I almost believe 'your people' really could do something about the timing of college bowl games. *grin*

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 05-Aug-2015
    Thank you so much, Dawn. Glad you enjoyed this. I'll be posting part II shortly, though not today.
reply by Dawn Munro on 05-Aug-2015
    I'll watch for it. :)
Comment from Ulla
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent Jay, I enjoyed reading this and as usual you have such a way with words. Spring is indeed the season of new beginnings, of new life everywhere around you. It is perhaps my favorite time of the year.
I liked where you say 'What have I forgotten'. It makes your reader to pause and to be engaged in what you are saying.
The accompanying picture is priceless. I will be reading on. All the best, Ulla

 Comment Written 04-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 04-Aug-2015
    Part II coming soon, Ulla. Thanks so much for your lavish words and your generous rating.
Comment from Walu Feral
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G'day Jay. Very well written and also a very interesting concept about springtime and new years ever, it's quite logical I think. It is wonderful how fresh ideas bloom with the buds and I enjoy that. Bring on part two sir. Cheers Fez

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 04-Aug-2015
    Thanks, Fez. Yes, Part two is the meatier of the two.
Comment from --Turtle.
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(Hi there, Jay. This chapter is an abstract one, you take your time getting from one point, and go metaphysically to the next, and the strand that connects beginning to end is, I don't know, fluttering like a butterfly? It is reminiscent and in some parts engaging... slowly putting the reader into a mind frame for considering some concept that will likely come next chapter.

The stenciled ... springtime is here."
(this sentence ran on long for me, a little)

I also imagine someone[,] staring at me from one of
(suggesting no comma here)

an old insurance man sitting in his chair behind his desk.
(this visual is neat, I really did like the way you denied literal reality with a more INNER truth via a the negative phrasing, Meaning: reality is false, and what the window guy 'may have' 'imagined seeing' is more true.)

to try to(and?) recapture the memory
(Not sure about this suggestion, to try and recapture? I thought this, but beware my random thought that I, for some reason, couldn't delete)

What have I forgotten?
(Nice way to engage the reader with a moment for them to consider their own revelations of springtime)

because our souls are already geared toward change, improvement, betterment.
(suggestion to consider(carefully as I'm not certain): either add a colon after toward-- already geared toward: change, improvement, betterment. Or maybe add the and before betterment? I wondered to myself here, What is the difference between improvement and betterment? desired here. I'm not sure I caught the implied difference as intended)

Complaints aside, though, [are we beginning to see](may be wordy, wondered if it was needed, Plus the 'are we' puts this into a question form, no?) there just

In the end, this is chapter is a preparing chapter, slowly shaping a thought into a larger concept related to creativity, though I'm anticipating a lead-in to a reading/ writing endeavor.

--Turtle.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 03-Aug-2015
    Thank you again, Turtle, for your ultra close inspection of the muscles and sinew of my post. Appreciated! Once more these are significant suggested changes as opposed to grammar. I will be pasting this to my folder and take it with me to the final edit.
Comment from Fridayauthor
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Very good posting and,as usual, very well written.

It reminded me of one of my all-time favorite short stories, "Another April", by Jesse Stuart. Google it; I'm sure you'll enjoy it too.

Thanks, Jay.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 03-Aug-2015
    The story itself is on Google? I'll check it out. Thanks Ray.
Comment from Chris Tee
Excellent
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One thing is for sure old chap and that is springtime is indeed the start of new life. Your article here is another great example of your great talent. Well done indeed with this excellent write.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 04-Aug-2015
    Thank you, Chris, for your kind words and for your generous rating. I'm gratified you enjoyed it.
Comment from XGoneX
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi,
I really enjoyed the kind of poetic writing in which you wrote this piece. There was almost magic in your words, in their meaning, and in your introspection.
I don't like winter, but I have the same inspiration in Spring than I have in other seasons.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 04-Aug-2015
    Thank you so much, Jade, for the 6 stars. It means a lot to me. The second part of the post will take place in a few days.
Comment from Annette Gulliver
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Another month before it is spring here downunder, but today feels like it's here already. Blue skies, sunshine and a light breeze; birds twittering, and I'm itching to start playing in the garden with all sorts of new projects going on in my head.
That's what I like about spring. Inspiration to do all sorts of things (and maybe a bit of writing). How could there be a downsize to springtime for the creative mind ... never. I'll see what you say in Part II.
Annette

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 04-Aug-2015
    Thank you, Annette. I'm glad you enjoyed the extended metaphor I used here. I think you'll enjoy part II. It's meatier than this.
Comment from Spitfire
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Hey, we're the same age. Since I live in Florida it's hard to connect to this write. Spring is when it's cool enough to open the windows. The other three seasons are either too hot or too cold. Yet, I do recall my childhood days in upstate NY. Spring brings to mind patches of snow freckling the ground.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2015


reply by the author on 03-Aug-2015
    That was taken from my blog of a few years ago. I'll be 76 in 8 days. Thanks for reading this. So glad you enjoyed it. Part two is a meatier one.