haiku (shrouded peaks arise)
Where is paradise?4 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Your haiku has the right amount of syllables, reflects a distilled experience, has a kigo, it has two juxtaposed ideas and it is descriptive. Excellent job!
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Your haiku has the right amount of syllables, reflects a distilled experience, has a kigo, it has two juxtaposed ideas and it is descriptive. Excellent job!
Comment Written 27-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you, GBR, for sharing my haiku and your kind praise.
Comment from Sis Cat
A beautiful and refreshing haiku. I love the imagery and mood your word choices evoked. This is a delicate poem. Thank you for sharing and I wish you success in the contest.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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A beautiful and refreshing haiku. I love the imagery and mood your word choices evoked. This is a delicate poem. Thank you for sharing and I wish you success in the contest.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Thank you for such a encouraging praise, Sis Cat. I am delighted you enjoyed this shortie.
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This has good concrete imagery with the shrouded peaks and the mist lifting from the glassy lake. I'm not sure what your kigo (seasonal reference) is. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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This has good concrete imagery with the shrouded peaks and the mist lifting from the glassy lake. I'm not sure what your kigo (seasonal reference) is. Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 27-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2015
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Jeanie, you are probably correct here. I struggled to suggest a season but did not want to sacrifice the imagery. Thank you so much for sharing.
Comment from Julia.
This is a nice little haiku. I like the idea of fog lifting up and revealing what is behind it, what it is concealing. The "glassy lake" also fits with the weather conditions that create fog, so that ties together. Good job.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
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This is a nice little haiku. I like the idea of fog lifting up and revealing what is behind it, what it is concealing. The "glassy lake" also fits with the weather conditions that create fog, so that ties together. Good job.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
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Thank you, Julia. The poem was inspired by the Albert Bierstadt painting I chose to accompany it with. . He's a 19th century American painter that romanticized the West.