Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose

Excellent

POEM
I enjoyed reading your poem. Good rhyme and even flow. Excellent word choice to enhance the theme. Nicely done and I thank you for sharing it.

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 13-Jun-2015

Thanks Gypsy Blue Rose for reading and reviewing this poem. I am glad you enjoyed the read thanks so much Cheers Christine😀

Comment from Pam (respa)

Excellent

-The photo is beautiful and the poem matches it so well in the word picture you create of the lovely day you spent there. The author notes are also helpful.
-The poem lets the reader experience everything you saw with such vivid detail.
-It makes it seem like a magical day, only it was real. It is always so wonderful to be part of nature and appreciate what you see.
-There are a few things to think about:
* their song a melody an operatic bushland sound (their song, a melody, an)
* then forward march unseen now lost to undergrowth (forward, marches unseen, now lost)
* duck beneath the shallows too. (shallows, too)
* these lovely birds their freedom unopposed (birds, their freedom)

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 12-Jun-2015

Thanks you respa it is always good to get your feedback and helpful suggestions, and if it improves my work always grateful, so I look forward to your critiques . And yes it was all real and very interesting watching nature interact . That was my first attempt at 'free verse ' also and haven't written any other since. But may just do some others soon thanks again Cheers Christine😊

Comment from kintesiegel

Excellent

Your poem demonstrates your ability to capture the beauty in nature and you do it with great effusiveness. As a matter of fact I almost accidentally fell in the river because I was so engrossed in your detailed description of everything delightful that surrounds you.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

Thank you kenteiegel for your time, rating and review of this poem. I find this place so descriptive that the words just seem to flow on by. I appreciate you comments and, I would have jumped in to rescue you lol thanks again Cheers Christine😄

Comment from skye

Excellent

You captured a day by the river, filling in the blanks with sounds, smells, visions, and thoughts.
I enjoyed the descriptive lines, the flow of the day, how you felt, and the sounds the birds made.
Well done.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

Thank you Skye for taking your time to read and review my poem. I enjoy the Murray and it gives me inspiration to write about it, I!m glad you thought it excellent thanks so much Cheers Christine😃

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is an excellent write, chrissy, i enjoyed taking this trip down the murray with you, great imagery presented about the site this river has to offer to tourists.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

Thank you sweetwoodjax, for you lovely review and I am glad you went down the Murray with me it is a lovely place . cheers Christine😀

Comment from Mystic Angel 7777

Excellent

This is a beautifully penned piece of poetic art. I think it meets the contest requirements splendidly, but am a little concerned that the judging committee may think it more prose-like due to the way it is formatted. You may want to try and get it to look more like poetry before the judging begins. I found the imagery simply stunning and thoroughly enjoyed my journey to the Murray on the wings of your creative imagination. I wish you the best in the judging and thank you for sharing it.

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

Thanks Mystic Angel for your feedback and suggestions, I am a little unsure just what constitutes free verse or even the format it should take. So I just wrote it exactly the same as I did in 2009. I shall have to look up the differences of prose to free verse and make the necessary adjustments. But I am glad you came to the Murray for a short time. Cheers Christine😀

reply by Mystic Angel 7777 on 11-Jun-2015

Hi Sweetie! Under the "Home" option on the menu bar there will be a link called "Poetry Dances" which provides examples and rules of form for almost every kind of poem style used here. You may find it helpful any time you are in doubt about what the specific requirements might be or what a finished piece should look like. Have a blessed and joyful day!

reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

thanks a lot for your advice I will have a look before I close my eyes. It is 10.56 pm here in Australia bed time.so you have a great day today cheers Christine😊

Comment from Walu Feral

Excellent

G'day Christine. Sorry mate, no sixes left. You gone and made an old blackfella hungry now with all that bush tucker yarnin. That was a great story full of vividness of the surroundings, all the overseas folks will get a kick out of this bit of Aussie education. I owe you a sixer cobber. Cheers Fez

 Comment Written 11-Jun-2015

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reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015

Thanks Fez I'm glad you like it that means a lot to me and yes what a beautiful piece of Australia, I hope my overseas readers will enjoy the tranquility too Thank heaps cobber Cheers Christine😀