Comment from Treischel

Excellent

I love a good Pantoum. They make such lovely poetry. Yours is no exception. You bring the color and feel of autumn to life. One thing though, Line 1 and 3 should be reversed and become line 2 and 4 of the last stanza. So that the last line is also the first line of the poem. I if you take the first line of your current last stanza and make it the last, then you have it.

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2015

Thanks for your review suggestions.
It's been a while and I'd forgotten that. I have fixed it.
I added the changes as a new stanza.
:-) Shirley

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

excellent abab rhyming and use of alliteration
vivid detail of setting with good appeal to a variety of senses
good use of the pantoum's repeating lines, though I prefer a pantoum to end with the same line with which it began by reversing the order of the lined repeated from stanza one :-)
Brooke

 Comment Written 21-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2015

Thanks Brooke.
I appreciate your review comments.
I have amended my poem to comply with your suggestions.
It is much more effective.
:-)Shirley

Comment from l.raven

Excellent

HI Shirley, you are so very right...God is truly the perfect artist...I love your poem...and can almost feel the days of Autumn...I love the colors of that season...a wonderful poem...and a beautiful picture...Luff Linda xxoo love

 Comment Written 20-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2015

Thanks Linda.
I appreciate your review.
I really love spring-new life, colour, warmth, and...
Conversely, I don't like cold icy winds, bleak, dark skies, cawing crows...Lol.
It is always a very long winter-even in Oz.
:-) Shirley

reply by l.raven on 23-Apr-2015

Hi Shirley, you are so welcome sweet girl...I love Winter...but it is time for it to sleep...love ya you...Luff xxoo

Comment from melyuki

Exceptional

Hi Shirley, what a beautiful poem. such delightful connotations come to mind when I read all your lines.. and the image you have used is Nature's perfection.. just love it.. The entire poem and photo gave me a happy warm feeling and even though I prefer the warmer months, you've painted a supreme Autumn feeling within your words. thanks for sharing and have a wonderful Autumn week Shirley.
happy smiles from mel xxxx

 Comment Written 20-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2015

Thanks a million Mel.
A six star review is wonderful.
You make my heart sing.
I do put a lot of time and effort into every poem.
:-) Shirley

Comment from nancy_e_davis

Excellent

Well done Shirley, a very nice pantoum about autumn
and the breathtaking russet colors that paint the landscape in autumn hues. Well done meter and rhyme. Good to put the rules in your notes. Something I like to do. More people should do that. xsx Nancy

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2015

Thanks Nancy.
Your time and review are appreciated.
Thanks also for the positive encouragement.
:-) Shirley

Comment from patcelaw

Excellent

This is a beautifully presented and written pantoum poetry format poem. It is spot on in the format and was a pleasure to read. Blessings, Patricia

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2015

Thank you Patricia.
Your generous review is truly appreciated.
:-) Shirley

Comment from Walu Feral

Excellent

G'day Shirley. This is a beautiful poem mate. The flow and rhythm are spot on and I sang it as I read it. I haven't seen much of Autumns over the years having lived in theTropic regions but when I have I've loved it. I enjoyed this one, well done, cheers Fez

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 21-Apr-2015

Thanks Fez.
I appreciate your review and continued interest and support.
:-) Shirley

Comment from Brett Matthew West

Excellent

Picture definitely added depth to this poem. Poem was well written and held reader's interest throughout. Autumn can provide very nice colors indeed. Write on.

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015

Thank you.
I appreciate your time and review.
:-) Shirley

Comment from Tomes Johnston

Excellent

This is a lovely poem from the author here. It is spring here in the United Kingdom. At last the sun is starting to shine. The days are getting longer and milder. It will be some time before we have to think about autumn.

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015

Thanks Tomes for a great review.
Your constant support is appreciated.
Spring is my favourite time of year. I'm like Goldilocks- I like it not too hot, not too cold -but just right. Lol.
:-) Shirley

reply by Tomes Johnston on 19-Apr-2015

Me too. 😃

Comment from bizzygirl

Excellent

FYI 3rd stanza, 3rd line first word should be "A" not "as" (not a criticism, easy edit) I really like the poem. It is difficutl to write this and make it work. The autumn images are so lovely I can almost smell the leaves. Well writen. Thanks for sharing.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 19-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015

Thank you for a lovely review.
I appreciate your time and editing hint.
:-) Shirkey