ShedMoreTears Fairy Tales@Fables"
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "TheBeartheMountain LionandtheWolf! "A delightful Childen Lesson Book.
3 total reviews
Comment from MusingsOfMWH
What I liked about your story "TheBeartheMountainLionandtheWolf!" was its inspirational message to children; sometimes I lost track of who was talking in the dialogue, but that may be due to my fatigue and my eyes are strained too much lately. I suppose it's time I took a break. Anyway, well done on your work's positive material.
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2015
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What I liked about your story "TheBeartheMountainLionandtheWolf!" was its inspirational message to children; sometimes I lost track of who was talking in the dialogue, but that may be due to my fatigue and my eyes are strained too much lately. I suppose it's time I took a break. Anyway, well done on your work's positive material.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 12-Feb-2015
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Thanks Miss MUSE!
Ricky...
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
I applaud you for the concept as the world can always learn more lessons on how to live together. This does not read like a story though as it seems to be a prologue. You also have a couple of glaring typos to take a look at:"a time whn words" - should this be 'when'?
"Hi ye-all!" - this should be y'all trust me on this as I live in the south.
Nicely done and I look forward to reading more when you are further along.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2015
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I applaud you for the concept as the world can always learn more lessons on how to live together. This does not read like a story though as it seems to be a prologue. You also have a couple of glaring typos to take a look at:"a time whn words" - should this be 'when'?
"Hi ye-all!" - this should be y'all trust me on this as I live in the south.
Nicely done and I look forward to reading more when you are further along.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2015
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Hi[ye-all is my stlye for the character and you would realize 8if you had reviewd the countless other pieces. As for grammar, it will be finished shortly. ricky.Mutants
Comment from c_lucas
This is a highly unusual read. I have not been following this story line, but It is very well written and I didn't see any errors. There is very good imagery.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2015
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This is a highly unusual read. I have not been following this story line, but It is very well written and I didn't see any errors. There is very good imagery.
Comment Written 10-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2015
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Thanks C done soon!
ricky.