When Boys Became Men
amazing how a couple of years can change our perspective5 total reviews
Comment from Judy Couch
You told a great story in just a few words. I liked the method you used of telling it almost like a journal. It's amazing how much ones attitude can change over time.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2014
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You told a great story in just a few words. I liked the method you used of telling it almost like a journal. It's amazing how much ones attitude can change over time.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2014
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Thank you, Judy. Much appreciated! Dennis
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the picture. It is funny how times change our views. Your brother did bully you. You quickly forgot that after he lost his life during the war. It is a shame most of us carry grudges most of our lives. Great work.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2014
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I love the picture. It is funny how times change our views. Your brother did bully you. You quickly forgot that after he lost his life during the war. It is a shame most of us carry grudges most of our lives. Great work.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2014
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Thank you! I appreciate you reading and commenting, Dennis
Comment from adewpearl
Most effective opening simile
Excellent contrast between the younger brother's attitude toward his brother in the two sections - strong emotional appeal
Brooke
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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Most effective opening simile
Excellent contrast between the younger brother's attitude toward his brother in the two sections - strong emotional appeal
Brooke
Comment Written 17-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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Thanks Brooke...appreciated.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this story about the death that brought changes to a young boy's focus on his brother. good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this story about the death that brought changes to a young boy's focus on his brother. good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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The mystery writer has a smile thanks to your kind words...it's a mysterious smile...just got a review that said it didn't have the elements of story in it...I'm going with you on this one.:)
Comment from lancellot
Well, the word count may be correct, but all the elements of a story are not present. I see the one-sided beginnings of a conflict, but no real resolution, just an ending.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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Well, the word count may be correct, but all the elements of a story are not present. I see the one-sided beginnings of a conflict, but no real resolution, just an ending.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2014
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2014
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I see a young boy who hates his older brother enough to want to kill him. Is that not an inner conflict? With the passage of time and the changing of circumstances (war, death) he sees his brother in a far different light. Is that not resolution? Me thinks so...at least with a 100 word limit. Thanks, Dennis