The Little Dog That Wouldn't Let Go
Viewing comments for Chapter 60 "Part 2 -More on Early Times"Subtitle: God Never Lets Go!
20 total reviews
Comment from michaelcahill
We call those doors that open from the front, "suicide doors" over here! Usually the back doors open like that though. This is fascinating stuff. Lots of it sounds familiar. Same thing over here growing up. Safe streets, we stayed out till way after dark, no supervision. We'd here our names called out into the night and one by one we'd go home. This is fine like this. As far as reviewing, it doesn't matter where it fits. Of course, eventually it will all have to be in sequence, but at least you can get some input this way. mikey
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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We call those doors that open from the front, "suicide doors" over here! Usually the back doors open like that though. This is fascinating stuff. Lots of it sounds familiar. Same thing over here growing up. Safe streets, we stayed out till way after dark, no supervision. We'd here our names called out into the night and one by one we'd go home. This is fine like this. As far as reviewing, it doesn't matter where it fits. Of course, eventually it will all have to be in sequence, but at least you can get some input this way. mikey
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Aw thanks mate so glad all these new folks flocking around my stuff. Can't wait to do two more split ups tomorrow yay!
Comment from seaglass
This is well written and gives us a clear glimpse of time back then. I've known children subjected to those crazy diets. There are still theories that people try to follow for hyperactivity etc. I think that unless someone is allergic or sensitive to a food, these theories are silly.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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This is well written and gives us a clear glimpse of time back then. I've known children subjected to those crazy diets. There are still theories that people try to follow for hyperactivity etc. I think that unless someone is allergic or sensitive to a food, these theories are silly.
Comment Written 28-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Hey thanks for coming by probably again. Wish I had figured out how to split the chapters before I spent all those promotional dollars recently. Appreciate you coming back! Only 2 a day now they are new" again"
Comment from c_lucas
I still marvel that with a family of sixteens (2 parents snd fourteen kids) we got a;pmg with one bathroom. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words,
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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I still marvel that with a family of sixteens (2 parents snd fourteen kids) we got a;pmg with one bathroom. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words,
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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As above Hey thanks for coming by probably again. Wish I had figured out how to split the chapters before I spent all those promotional dollars recently. Appreciate you coming back! Only 2 a day now they are new" again"
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Check my "An Orphan Name Jo," series. You're welcome, Geoff, Charlie.
Comment from Jay Squires
She was almost 18months younger than me. [ younger than I...]
I spent a lot of time with the eldest, a girl. [Geoff, this would be an excellent place to inject some meaningful conversation between the two of you. This brings the chapter alive. Were there any conflicts, romance, discussions about the thumb-sucking brother?]
In between our 2 houses, was a great big ant-hill. [Spacing problem.]
But there was a kidnapping later on, in the street around from us. [I remember reading this in another chapter.]
An interesting chapter, Geoff. Please consider what I spoke of above, about the dialogue. You need it so much in this biography.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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She was almost 18months younger than me. [ younger than I...]
I spent a lot of time with the eldest, a girl. [Geoff, this would be an excellent place to inject some meaningful conversation between the two of you. This brings the chapter alive. Were there any conflicts, romance, discussions about the thumb-sucking brother?]
In between our 2 houses, was a great big ant-hill. [Spacing problem.]
But there was a kidnapping later on, in the street around from us. [I remember reading this in another chapter.]
An interesting chapter, Geoff. Please consider what I spoke of above, about the dialogue. You need it so much in this biography.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Ok you have read this before these are split ups of old bigger chapters and maybe there is some overlap I need to work on so glad I have figured out how to split them up always appreciate yuour advice mate.
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Hi again I have added some more about falling out of the car. Not sure about the other area regarding the kidnapping will check that and if a double up will fix. I am guessing you might have read it in the other Chapter before I split them up.
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Think I have deleted the Kidnapping reference from the other chapter sorry getting oild and some Senior Moments ie repeatsw happening Appreciate you picking them up.
Comment from RonCraig
Sankey, I am the first to admit writing memoirs is beyond my area but I will offer my thoughts. Our experiences growing up define who we are. I realize I need to go back to your beginning on this but this was the first look posted in my email box.
I did enjoy this chapter but as I read through it I didn't feel a flow between paragraphs or how these experiences help shape who you are today.
An example in your first paragraph.
I have always been restless and inquisitive. I recall this as far back as Pre-school at Lane Cove. Mum would take me in the mornings and I would ride the tram in the afternoon with my Grandmother to her old terrace house on Falcon Street in Crows' Nest. Even then at 3 years old, when all the other children slept on their canvas stretchers, I would lay awake for what seemed like hours. I learned my inquisitive nature could get me in trouble at that young age, a fractured skull. Our car was a Peugeot Station Wagon with forward opening doors. They were labeled "suicide doors" for a reason. I had seen others open and close them while moving when the door was not closed properly. So I figured I could do the same, but the wind got hold of the car door and pulled me out with it. I ended up in hospital with friar's balsam or somesuch all over my head.
Just a thought.
When you talk about the girl next door, give her a name. Was she just there or was there something special about her? Something you learned from her? What does knowing her bring to your story?
I guess what I am trying to say is pull us into your growth emotionally with your thoughts and feeling, your questions and answers along the way.
I hope this helps and I could be way off base here my friend,
Ron
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reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Sankey, I am the first to admit writing memoirs is beyond my area but I will offer my thoughts. Our experiences growing up define who we are. I realize I need to go back to your beginning on this but this was the first look posted in my email box.
I did enjoy this chapter but as I read through it I didn't feel a flow between paragraphs or how these experiences help shape who you are today.
An example in your first paragraph.
I have always been restless and inquisitive. I recall this as far back as Pre-school at Lane Cove. Mum would take me in the mornings and I would ride the tram in the afternoon with my Grandmother to her old terrace house on Falcon Street in Crows' Nest. Even then at 3 years old, when all the other children slept on their canvas stretchers, I would lay awake for what seemed like hours. I learned my inquisitive nature could get me in trouble at that young age, a fractured skull. Our car was a Peugeot Station Wagon with forward opening doors. They were labeled "suicide doors" for a reason. I had seen others open and close them while moving when the door was not closed properly. So I figured I could do the same, but the wind got hold of the car door and pulled me out with it. I ended up in hospital with friar's balsam or somesuch all over my head.
Just a thought.
When you talk about the girl next door, give her a name. Was she just there or was there something special about her? Something you learned from her? What does knowing her bring to your story?
I guess what I am trying to say is pull us into your growth emotionally with your thoughts and feeling, your questions and answers along the way.
I hope this helps and I could be way off base here my friend,
Ron
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Thanks Ron appreciate you jumping in so glad you took the trouble just as I did with all your spags too hehe! All help is welcomed these are split ups of former larger chapters so I can only do a couple a day. Thanks heaps will look at your suggestions.
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Ron I have made some changes including giving the girl a name (not her real name ok she is a Grandmother these days. Had she married me she would never have had kids ho hum.
Comment from dennis0530
This piece is writing about childhood memories; a nostalgic piece.
The follies of childhood. We had versions of our own tupenny bungers. We would wrap them in small plastic bags with just a small part of the fuse protruding. Then light the fuse and quickly dump them into river water. Delightfully we would jump with joy to the whoomping sound of our mini underwater mines. Ah, those days; we could even play tug-of-war in the light of a shining fulll moon.
We had a counter for the fly swat or the broom handle - a reasonably thick cardboard cover for the buttocks and a moist thin cloth over it to imitate the real whack!
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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This piece is writing about childhood memories; a nostalgic piece.
The follies of childhood. We had versions of our own tupenny bungers. We would wrap them in small plastic bags with just a small part of the fuse protruding. Then light the fuse and quickly dump them into river water. Delightfully we would jump with joy to the whoomping sound of our mini underwater mines. Ah, those days; we could even play tug-of-war in the light of a shining fulll moon.
We had a counter for the fly swat or the broom handle - a reasonably thick cardboard cover for the buttocks and a moist thin cloth over it to imitate the real whack!
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2014
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Hey Dennioa noce having a new friend. I love the reminiscences stiff cardboard that's different tool for punishment. And the home made bungers that's good too thanks again. Appreciating all you new folks getting on board should have done these split ups the other day before I spent all those Member dollars and go virtually nothing in response! See ya round.
Comment from judiverse
I like your conversational tone. You have some interesting anecdotes in this, and the progression of events is very well handled. I don't know how you remembered what you slept on at pre-school. Interesting story of falling out of the car. That would certainly be memorable. An excellent observation about how it was safer for kids to go out and play on their own back in the days. I heard of a U.S. woman who is in trouble with the law because she let her son go the playground unattended. What understanding parents that they built an apartment for your sister and family. It would have been strange to be an uncle at age 6. Great work. judi
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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I like your conversational tone. You have some interesting anecdotes in this, and the progression of events is very well handled. I don't know how you remembered what you slept on at pre-school. Interesting story of falling out of the car. That would certainly be memorable. An excellent observation about how it was safer for kids to go out and play on their own back in the days. I heard of a U.S. woman who is in trouble with the law because she let her son go the playground unattended. What understanding parents that they built an apartment for your sister and family. It would have been strange to be an uncle at age 6. Great work. judi
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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Hey Sis you are coming in on the new split up of the bigger chapters now I can offer carrots should have thought of this before, Ha! Only thing is now I can only do 2 "splits" a day but you get more pictures yay! They don't come up in order either :( Thanks again for your support. Read both partsa of the first 2 chapters more tomorrow hehe.
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You're welcome. Great picture in this one. judi
Comment from Fridayauthor
This is a nice remembrance piece that is quite informative. (I too swung out of a car door caught by the wind.)
Some tightening up might be considered, along the lines below.
As a youngster I often did the shopping for Mum. As I grew older, Mum would give me a list of things to get down at the local General store, which also included the green grocer. Mr C. the Italian owner of the store, was always so helpful. He would write the prices of all the veggies, and so on, on my shopping list.
I often shopped for Mum. She would give me a list for the local General store, which also sold vegetables. Mr. C, the owner, would write the prices of the veggies on my list.
Very nice posting. I enjoyed reading it.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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This is a nice remembrance piece that is quite informative. (I too swung out of a car door caught by the wind.)
Some tightening up might be considered, along the lines below.
As a youngster I often did the shopping for Mum. As I grew older, Mum would give me a list of things to get down at the local General store, which also included the green grocer. Mr C. the Italian owner of the store, was always so helpful. He would write the prices of all the veggies, and so on, on my shopping list.
I often shopped for Mum. She would give me a list for the local General store, which also sold vegetables. Mr. C, the owner, would write the prices of the veggies on my list.
Very nice posting. I enjoyed reading it.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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Thanks new friend finally figured out a weawy to split the chapters and get mpore of you new friends reading and reviewing. Thanks for the suggestion wiull work on it later after we get bacjk from church. Stick with us you are going to see some more break ups of chapters now I have figured out how to do it to get more of you new readers interested in shorter reads. Always appreciate suggestions for improvement ok
Comment from sibhus
It appears to be a well written good start to an interesting book. Then again I'm a sucker for anything that begins with a simpler happier time of yesteryear. It really did seem that kids were a lot safer back in our day, or it least kidnappings and molestation weren't as frequent. Good chapter and thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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It appears to be a well written good start to an interesting book. Then again I'm a sucker for anything that begins with a simpler happier time of yesteryear. It really did seem that kids were a lot safer back in our day, or it least kidnappings and molestation weren't as frequent. Good chapter and thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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Hi new friend have finally worked out how to split up my cvhapters of an already established autobiography appreciate you jumping in check out part 1 as well ok! Stick around will see a big change today.
Comment from royowen
I'm loving your biography Geoff, there are things in there that remind me of my childhood. Mum had a wooden spoon, which mum would break on our bottoms. We used to blowup ant's nests and trapdoor spider's holes as well, ( haven't seen those for years, perhaps we blew them all up) your work is well written, I am absorbed in the goings on , keep it up, you and I had similar experience! Well done, blessings, Roy.
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reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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I'm loving your biography Geoff, there are things in there that remind me of my childhood. Mum had a wooden spoon, which mum would break on our bottoms. We used to blowup ant's nests and trapdoor spider's holes as well, ( haven't seen those for years, perhaps we blew them all up) your work is well written, I am absorbed in the goings on , keep it up, you and I had similar experience! Well done, blessings, Roy.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2014
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Thanks Bro finally figuring out a way to Split the chapters just hope any new folks realise they need to get the part numbers in order. hang around trying to get it sorted before we head off to a special service with my old ortginal pastor over from America
