Reviews from

summerlove

the poem is about me falling in love with a camp counselor a

8 total reviews 
Comment from Ricky1024
Excellent
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Short and sweet but that's about a camp friend.
Write me a love poem...
As best as you can about me...
A biker on my Kawasaki 2000cc. Cycle {Baby-Blue eyes!]
Thanks Crystal,
Ricky..
Call me and tell me how college life is treating you.
Update: 2023
You still here with me?
Doctor Ricky1024

 Comment Written 06-Oct-2014


reply by the author on 08-Oct-2014
    Hi its crystal i just wrote you an lovepoem on your page on fanstory.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Average
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Your topic is good and your word choices do describe your summer love. Now you can take from the lines you have written and condense them to the 5-7-5 format. You have some good material to work with in the lines of this poem. To me this feels like a rough draft. You can turn it into a final copy with some more work if you try. Good luck with your writing in the future.

 Comment Written 02-Oct-2014

Comment from mikemagine
Excellent
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He might come off as a turtle dove, but maybe he's actually a crow in dove's clothing. He might have bodies in the basement or the garden. Kidding. This is a GOOD little poem. You say much in few words, and you write with clarity!

Mike

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2014

Comment from Dawny53
Good
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Hello Crystal, just a couple of things you may want to go back and fix.. in your first line separate summer and crushes.. second line an should be a... third line a comma after end.. I didn't count your syllables but I think you may have to many

 Comment Written 01-Oct-2014

Comment from sunnilicious
Good
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5-7-5 would be syllable count per line. So a rewrite is in order. But I am glad you found a love. Love with a camp counselor is just infatuation. You'll meet someone good. It's good to be expressive. Good luck to you.

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2014

Comment from mruss1
Excellent
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Hi Crystal and hope you are well but it sounds that you are. I think perhaps the most important part of poetry is the words come from your heart and they are honest. Both you have included. Summer is grand for so many reasons the sun never seems to set and the days sometimes feel like they are forever. Also we can't discount the fact you found love for it is quite grand:) Take care and keep writing:) Mark

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2014

Comment from TOMORAL
Average
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This is an interesting poem, but it's not a 5-7-5. According to the contest rules, this is not a valid entry. I'm sorry to do this, but I have to give this a 3. Although the rhymes were good, it just doesn't meet the requirements.

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2014

Comment from OLA THOMAS
Excellent
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So sorry dear about your feeling, but there is more time to re-unite in the future. And now, sorry to tell you that what you have here does not conform with a 5-7-5 poetry form. It has to be 5 syllables for the first line; 7 syllables for the second line and 5 syllables for the third line. I believe you can do it. Try this again.

ola thomas

 Comment Written 09-Aug-2014