April
A girl I met in spring27 total reviews
Comment from Kelly Hanna
It felt a bit off with flow for me. I did love the message! Thanks for sharing with all of us! //////////////////////////////////////!/////////////////////////////////////////
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2018
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It felt a bit off with flow for me. I did love the message! Thanks for sharing with all of us! //////////////////////////////////////!/////////////////////////////////////////
Comment Written 30-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2018
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Hi.
I'll have to look up a bit off flow in my SPAG book. How many are
are you? Thanks.
DeLaHay
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Well I'm not sure what a spag book is....I'm not sure I'd care to find out.
I am not here as a professional critic. What I can offer you is the opinion of someone that enjoys poetry. Which, by the by, your comment is a bit pretentious. Nonetheless. I'll not allow it to vex me. :) I hope that your spag book takes you wherever you are going. And I'm sorry if my comment upset or insulted you. It was not personal and I'm no professional. Take care & good luck.
Comment from jenintorre
This is a very interesting poem about a very troubled mind. I love the reputation at the end of each stanza, it emphasizes the very well written words. Nice one. Cheers. Jen.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2018
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This is a very interesting poem about a very troubled mind. I love the reputation at the end of each stanza, it emphasizes the very well written words. Nice one. Cheers. Jen.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2018
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. Sorry about the time F.S would not let me log in. I thought I had been ostracized.
DeLahay
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written poem about people who come into our lives and turn it upside down. By the time we know who they really are, they already have taken our hearts and step on it.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2018
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A very well-written poem about people who come into our lives and turn it upside down. By the time we know who they really are, they already have taken our hearts and step on it.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2018
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Thank you for your review and thoughts. Sorry about the time F.S would not let me log in. I thought I had been ostracized.
DeLaHay
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I have known some people like this in my lifetime. I love the repeated line that sort of mimics someone who is not of sound mind, a scary write, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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I have known some people like this in my lifetime. I love the repeated line that sort of mimics someone who is not of sound mind, a scary write, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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Thank you Dolly!
D
Comment from Cindy McIntyre
This is a very thought-provoking and emotionally charged piece. I really liked the repeated lines throughout for the extra level of turmoil. Mental illness/insanity does come in many forms, and I hope our society learns to address it more. A well-written piece.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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This is a very thought-provoking and emotionally charged piece. I really liked the repeated lines throughout for the extra level of turmoil. Mental illness/insanity does come in many forms, and I hope our society learns to address it more. A well-written piece.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hi,
Thank you very much for the review and your input.
Comment from Boogienights
This is truly heartbreaking. What happened to her? Mental illness is such a terrible thing to understand and accept when it happens to someone you love. It is a struggle everyday, not only for those who battle it, but the families as well. My son has schizophrenia very severe and we just take it one day at a time. I'm grateful that he's still with us. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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This is truly heartbreaking. What happened to her? Mental illness is such a terrible thing to understand and accept when it happens to someone you love. It is a struggle everyday, not only for those who battle it, but the families as well. My son has schizophrenia very severe and we just take it one day at a time. I'm grateful that he's still with us. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hi,
Thank you very much for the review and your input.
Comment from royowen
Well done, this condition is such a waste , the people afflicted are quite definitely walking among us daily, badly in need of help, some seemingly seem normal. Beautifully written in super, deftly crafted verse, in rhyming quintains, well dine, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Well done, this condition is such a waste , the people afflicted are quite definitely walking among us daily, badly in need of help, some seemingly seem normal. Beautifully written in super, deftly crafted verse, in rhyming quintains, well dine, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hi,
Thank you very much for the review and your input.
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Most welcome
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Thanks Roy!
DeLaHay
Comment from phil nelson
I felt in reading this that you were somewhat torn between rhyme and free verse --maybe that was intentional --the subject of insanity is disturbing and yet your poem had a bounce to it--again maybe intentional but i got lost a bit
I think you have the essence of a great poem here, and it might help to pretend you are the reader rather than the writer to see if there are any changes you might see--
All the best!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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I felt in reading this that you were somewhat torn between rhyme and free verse --maybe that was intentional --the subject of insanity is disturbing and yet your poem had a bounce to it--again maybe intentional but i got lost a bit
I think you have the essence of a great poem here, and it might help to pretend you are the reader rather than the writer to see if there are any changes you might see--
All the best!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2018
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Thank's
Comment from Debbie Pope
This is an extremely moving poem. The strange thing is, I'm not sure of my emotion. I feel strange, sad, and a little scared. I don't know how to handle the emotions revealed in the poem. The narrator is so clearly confused. What do you do with people like that?
I often judge a poem by how much it made me feel. Yours was compelling. Excellent job.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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This is an extremely moving poem. The strange thing is, I'm not sure of my emotion. I feel strange, sad, and a little scared. I don't know how to handle the emotions revealed in the poem. The narrator is so clearly confused. What do you do with people like that?
I often judge a poem by how much it made me feel. Yours was compelling. Excellent job.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hi,
Thank you very much for the review and your input.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
This is a poignant poem of one remembering a past acquaintance & wondering about her life. I like the repeat of the second to last line for the last line, or a slightly different version of it. It makes a strong impact on readers. You give readers much to ponder--especially after reading your notes. Your lines flow smoothly--I like the shorter lines--quickens the pace. Thanks for sharing. Jan
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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This is a poignant poem of one remembering a past acquaintance & wondering about her life. I like the repeat of the second to last line for the last line, or a slightly different version of it. It makes a strong impact on readers. You give readers much to ponder--especially after reading your notes. Your lines flow smoothly--I like the shorter lines--quickens the pace. Thanks for sharing. Jan
Comment Written 26-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2018
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Hi,
Thank you very much for the review and your input.
