Comment from WLHall

Good

This poem has a lot of emotion coming off the page, wow! It tells how it is through the stages of the pain of crying. You succeeded in getting that accomplished. Just a couple of places where I found problems:
1)Stay consistent with starting each line with either capitals or lower case.
2)Line5: instead of there "were" a shock, should be there "was" a shock
3)Line 7: "drawning" is spelled "drowning" and maybe write "sharks after sharks attack you..."
Otherwise, I still got the whole idea of the emotional pain and how it can also lead to physical pain. You used very strong, effective words.
WLHall

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2014

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reply by the author on 25-Mar-2014

Thank you :D,I appreciate your review:D
I'd take more time in the future checking such mistakes before posting .

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

I love the format of this with periods at the beginning......
There is a typo.....you fell like you're drawning.........should be drowning...
Well written ..............
God bless

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2014

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reply by the author on 25-Mar-2014

Thank you . second comment that has made my day :D

Comment from Eternal Muse

Excellent

I know that feeling after you cry. It is no picnic (smile). You describe it very well in this emotive write.
Very honest and down to earth, very real.

I hope you are not crying today, and enjoying your day.

Thanks for sharing, love, Y.

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2014

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reply by the author on 25-Mar-2014

Thaaaaank you , this poem was my first and I was anxious that nobody would like it so this comment really means a lot to me .thank you again :D