Aiona's Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Zane Grey"Because my portfolio is too messy and I have OCD.
4 total reviews
Comment from Marillion
I had no idea that's where he wrote from. I spend a lot of time in Marina del Rey, and had no idea how close I was to his writing retreat. I never even went to Catalina.
Nicely done, my friend, about a writer whose work I very much enjoy. I have some thoughts for revision, based on meter:
I tried to see your house one day.
Rented a boat to sail your way.
But the wind was far too strong,
White caps had pushed me far along
And forced me back to Marina del Rey.
Shall I ever see your writing spot
Perched upon a Catalina hilltop?
Or shall I pine away
Reading your books all day
'Til obligations make me stop?
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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I had no idea that's where he wrote from. I spend a lot of time in Marina del Rey, and had no idea how close I was to his writing retreat. I never even went to Catalina.
Nicely done, my friend, about a writer whose work I very much enjoy. I have some thoughts for revision, based on meter:
I tried to see your house one day.
Rented a boat to sail your way.
But the wind was far too strong,
White caps had pushed me far along
And forced me back to Marina del Rey.
Shall I ever see your writing spot
Perched upon a Catalina hilltop?
Or shall I pine away
Reading your books all day
'Til obligations make me stop?
Comment Written 16-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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Thank you, Marillion. I tried to make it a limerick, but couldn't think of a way to make it bawdy. Maybe you'd have a better go at it? :)
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A bawdy poem/limerick about Zane Grey. Hmmm...that sounds really interesting. :)
Comment from HL Pepper
Oh wow! Aiona, this is fantastic!
I love how you've incorporated your feeling of wanting more than his books offer.
My uncle was very special to me and all he would read was Zane Grey. Thanks for making me think of him. I miss him.
Your last line is right on. Work is such a pathetic inconvenience, isn't it?? :) Nice job!!
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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Oh wow! Aiona, this is fantastic!
I love how you've incorporated your feeling of wanting more than his books offer.
My uncle was very special to me and all he would read was Zane Grey. Thanks for making me think of him. I miss him.
Your last line is right on. Work is such a pathetic inconvenience, isn't it?? :) Nice job!!
Comment Written 16-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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Mm. I've met so many writers lately who've either retired or quit their jobs to write. Some success stories. Some not so successful... rather tragic actually. I guess I'll keep plugging along. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Everyone seems to be doing tribute poems, so I thought I'd give it a try.
Comment from Misrael
I had never known that little tid bit about zane grey. I have a few of his books but as of yet I have not read them. Good read and keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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I had never known that little tid bit about zane grey. I have a few of his books but as of yet I have not read them. Good read and keep up the good work.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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Thank you, Misrael.
Comment from CR Delport
That sounds like quite an adventure actually. I myself is very scared of water, especially the ocean. This is very well written.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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That sounds like quite an adventure actually. I myself is very scared of water, especially the ocean. This is very well written.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
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Thank you. :) Any suggestions for improvement?