Reviews from

The Waters Off Rigel Part 1

Short Story

19 total reviews 
Comment from Sasha
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I am back. At least today. I have been recuperating from a serious case of pneumonia and plan to take my time catching up on what I missed. I will do my best to read all your posts but cannot promise how quickly I will be able to do this.


So far this sounds like a fascinating story and you piqued my interest immediately. You are an excellent writer and I wouldn't suppose to have any suggestions that could possibly improve this.

 Comment Written 19-Jan-2014

Comment from Sankey
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My, my off on another Tangent my friend. You do hacve a diversity of skills for sure.
Thanks for an interesting read.
Some possible spags?? was (e)very movie of the week in truth.
went (gone)with Mary

 Comment Written 18-Jan-2014

Comment from nordicgirl
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Had no idea where this was going. But that is okay. The couple is fleshed out beatifully and i am interested in whatever they do. The story that is beginning to unfold looks interrsting. I am hooked. ND

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 17-Jan-2014
    Trying to follow some advice from previous postings. Seems like it is paying off. Encouraging comments. Thank you, mikey
Comment from GracieAnn
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Mikey, I enjoyed the story line and the tongue-in-cheek humor. The fun part about the 70's is all too true. My niece's, who is now 45, name is Skye. LOL I found this line well written, "There was a sense of future with him. You felt as though there were still surprises left to discover. He was always in the company of youth". Good job with the character's descriptions and the dangerous up and coming mission. (Check "occurrences that happening around it".) :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014

Comment from Nichola
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Rigel is 772.9 light years from Earth, and our sun is 8 light minutes and 20 seconds from our Earth. You may cross reference this in case I am incorrect.

Fabulous story. I really like it - draws the reader in right away and keeps the interest. If I were you, I would leave out the part about "Light Years for Dummies." the story is intriguing and the reader will not want to read about the author putting himself down.

You may need to identify what year it is, and also identify the rate of speed of the fastest spaceship of that era. Then you will need to identify the distance to Rigel (105,000,000 km.) Distance/rate = time. Once you know the distance, just divide it by the rate of speed of your spaceship(km/hour) to get the time it takes (in hours) to get to Rigel. Divide resulting time in hours by 24 to get number of days, then divide that number by 7 to get number of weeks. Make sure that your units are consistent.

Fabulous story. I like your characters.

Nichola

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014

Comment from Tatarka2
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I'm sorry, I read Part 2 first. This is better, I think. The beginning pulls the reader in, and here the voice is more clear. You introduce us to the plot and characters, and the first-person perspective makes sense. I wish I'd read this first, but Part 2 cam up first on my messages. The whole thing hangs together better with this intro.

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014

Comment from ravenblack
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Flower power gone mad- you like to write yourself into these stories, Mr. Einstein. Just think it took a little long to get into the meat of this one. I'm not really sure if the nameless couple passage is necessary or that it should be shortened. You ever read Gateway by Frederick Pohl?

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 15-Jan-2014
    I was thinking that too, but then others want more details. What's a girl to do. Hahaha. Haven't read that, no. Part of the problem which you notice is that there is no story when it starts out. The story occurs to me later. So, the beginning can be drawn out and appear to be overly long in comparison to what is needed for the story. Did I name them in the first part? I guess not. Part two has the names I hope. Ha! mikey
Comment from Darkhorse555
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wow you sure draw the imagination in with these words The discovery of a wormhole just outside of earth's own atmosphere
loved reading this a delightfully beautiful piece mikey dear friend

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014

Comment from nelliesellie
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It sounds like a good team. One will analyze each bit of knowledge with care. They all thirst for knowledge. One has a good sense of humor. Doctor Trent is older and more tested. This crew is going on an interesting journey. Great work.

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014

Comment from robina1978
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I liked the start of the story, it is exactly the way hubby and I met and got married. Then it gets more science fiction-like. I did not like the combination too much, sorry. I'd choose for one or the other.

 Comment Written 15-Jan-2014