Reviews from

Death Row

100 word contest

8 total reviews 
Comment from Aiona
Excellent
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Very succinct little story with a twist to the ending that I liked very much. The set up to the ending was appropriate preface by itself. Very nicely done! I didn't see any typos, either.

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 10-Jan-2014
    Thanks. I appreciate the read and review, especially when the story has gone dormant and pays nothing. that is very kind.
reply by Aiona on 10-Jan-2014
    Aw, heck. I read what catches my eye. If it bores me, there's no way I can review it. Often times, I'm of the type that if I can't say anything good, I'm just not gonna say anything at all. Usually. There are exceptions.
Comment from Smoothiecool
Excellent
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god luck in the contest
your story allows the reader to see and feel the shift on death row and the drawing to ask a inmate if he was frightened "no" was the response of the inmate who was already dead on the inside
cheers SC

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2014
    Thanks for reading. There is really no reason to fear the beginning or end of life.
reply by Smoothiecool on 04-Jan-2014
    welcome
Comment from nelliesellie
Excellent
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The prisoner was no longer in prison. He preferred death. He was already on his way. The doctor knew the time of his exaction. Great work. Good luck on the contest.

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2014
    Thanks so much for the read and review.
Comment from Erik McGinley
Excellent
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I guess the story is really about the sense of shock the new employee may have felt at the immediacy of death in that situation.

Strangely, I've been in a similar, if not the same situation and find myself wondering how many incidents like that it takes to destroy ability to react.

Strangely, I've been in a similar, if not the same situation.

 Comment Written 03-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 03-Jan-2014
    It takes professionals, in my opinion, a balancing act between compassion and scientific probability. One minute you're alive, the next you don't exist. Thanks for reading.
Comment from Cajungirl
Excellent
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The one hundred work 'prisoner' writing prompt contest has been excellently with your entry. I enjoyed the read very much. Best of luck in the contes.
;'

 Comment Written 02-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 02-Jan-2014
    Thanks so much. Budget writing is challenging. thanks for reading.
Comment from Domino 2
Excellent
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Very terse and therefore dramatic writing.

Who knows what goes through a convicted criminal's mind at this time?

You certainly use very strong visuals and feelings (or passivity/resignation) to write about it.

Good luck, Ted

 Comment Written 02-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 02-Jan-2014
    Thanks so much. Those 100 words can be challenging.
Comment from mfowler
Excellent
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You have created a cold, eerie atmosphere in a very short space here. Knowing that she does a shift on Death Row as a first, is a scary enough premise, but the questioning of the prisoner who isn't scared to die is almost ' Silence of the Lambs' in its intent to create tension. The matter of fact finish with the doctor taking note of the time of death just adds to the spooky and cold hearted atmosphere.

 Comment Written 02-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 02-Jan-2014
    I'm glad I succeeded in creating the mood. 100 words is a tight budget.
Comment from brentman99
Excellent
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A very interesting short story. I've made a few suggestions below that may save a word or two, but help the flow. Use or discard as you please:

Grace imagined (her posting) to death row allowed her inexperience to have no impact (and would) give her a chance to get used to the despair on the faces of the inmates.

Through the night, she (was) drawn to the man in the (delete last) bed at the end of the corridor.

Thanks for sharing, Brent.

 Comment Written 02-Jan-2014


reply by the author on 02-Jan-2014
    You're right. Implemented 2 out of 3 suggestions and they do improve the flow. Thanks so much.