Reviews from

Mike Radshaw and the Black Dawn

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Pissing in the Tiger's Mouth-BD5"
The grim reaper casts his pall over London

17 total reviews 
Comment from Michaela Moore
Excellent
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Even though this is not my cup of tea, as we have discussed in an earlier chapter, the following is why I keep reading this book of yours (well, I also read it because I consider you an important writing buddy and your writing is always exceptional) but mainly I keep reading this story because...

"I'm doing this because some evil cunt who thinks he can run about doing whatever he likes kidnapped a baby and took it somewhere properly fucked up. Sure, it's an Angwrath or an angel's son or something, and I'm sure I don't understand it. It's still a baby, though, and last time I checked, that's not okay."

That right there. That is why I like your protagonist and care about him and what he is doing. You have taken a genre and a subject that I hate reading and have hooked me because of this protagonist who I love so much.

 Comment Written 15-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
    Thank you, Michaela :-). This character is like a very extreme expression of me, living through these tales with the kind of purpose I like to think I'd have, if I wasn't Mike the shy Civil Servant, lol :-).

    Mike
Comment from Thomas Blanks
Excellent
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First of all, I would like to tell you that "Pissing in [any] tiger's mouth" is an inexpensive way to get a radical sex-change operation.
Mike Radshaw spends more time talking to bad guys that are not the death demon Mr. Black than villains in Sean Connery Bond movies talked AFTER they captured James Bond. "Now that I have captured you, 007, I will explain my entire criminal operation. Then, instead of shooting you, we will drag you behind a high-powered yacht until sharks get you." OR
"Now that I have captured you, 007, I will explain Operation Grand Slam. Then, instead of shooting you, I will leave you on this table with a slow-moving laser beam. No one will ensure you actually get killed. Goodbye!"

 Comment Written 13-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
    Lol, yes there is a lot of chat in this chapter. When I was proof reading before reviving it, I thought if I was writing it now, the conversation with Wilberford would be about half the length. Still, beyond a few spag tweaks, I didn't want to alter it too much. Also, good point about the tiger :-)

    Mike
Comment from Cindy Warren
Excellent
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Who knows what weird place Mr. Black might like. And it doesn't look like Radshaw has any plan for getting out. How is getting himself killed going to help the baby?

 Comment Written 11-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 12-Oct-2022
    Oh, it gets madder from here :-). As for Radshaw, he's more about intent and hope than plans, but we'll see what he can manage to achieve!

    Mike
Comment from Ric Myworld
Excellent
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It's always a pleasure to read your vivid descriptions, similes, and metaphors, showing me just how much farther I should take them in my own writing. Outstanding writing as always. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 11-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Tha ks Ric :-). This character is a perfect outlet for taking things to extremes to see where I can push them, then I can use what works elsewhere.

    Mike
Comment from lyenochka
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That's a quite a different dimension than Dante's version of hell and then also, the language of the devil has apparently become modernized. Lol. You've got a great imagination. I liked the reference to the Sistine Chapel and somehow this reminds me of dragon in the apocalypse getting after the baby in Revelation 12. But your hero, of course, is Mike Radshaw.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 12-Oct-2022
    Thank you :-). I love the idea of ancient beings trying to use modern language and how that might play out. I managed to reference just enough historical elements to feel as thought I'd created a 'plausible madness' (if I'm allowed the fallacy) whereby these things could, technically, be true lol!

    Mike
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Excellent
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This was as compelling as ever. I especially think it's fantastic that the 'hero' has a filthier mouth than the devil... by miles. Thanks for sharing these with us. Kate xx

 Comment Written 09-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 10-Oct-2022
    Lol, thanks Kate :-). I love the idea of Moke Radshaw undermining the embodiment of evil with some properly brutal put-downs. Of course, Mr Black is unlikely to play fair!

    Mike
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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It sounds like a cross between a Stephen King novel and a Carter Brown, you're very clever with dialogue, I thought to myself, "sticks and stones" heh heh. The devil would be one difficult dude to deal with, although Jesus beat Him in a most unusual way. Beautifully written Mike, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 09-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
    Thank you, Roy - really glad you enjoyed the chapter :-). If it was a showdown entirely of words, I think Radshaw would win, but I suspect Mr Black has other tricks up his sleeve!

    Mike
reply by royowen on 09-Oct-2022
    I?m sure hevhas
Comment from Douglas Goff
Excellent
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Nice. This is something that I would read. Very interesting. I tried hard to find a grammatical error and only found :

Got you back, Rad-" he said before he realised his mistake

Realized

Great dialogue and story. Keep it up!

 Comment Written 09-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 09-Oct-2022
    Thanks so much, Douglas :-). Sorry to disappoint, but I'm English, so realised is correct! Really glad you enjoyed the read.

    Mike
reply by Douglas Goff on 09-Oct-2022
    Too funny. I looked it up after I reviewed and learned something new!
Comment from Hitcher
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Brilliant chapter Mike, bloody brilliant mate! It is an absolute treat getting to read/see Mr. Radshaw going to town on all those foolish enough to get in his way. The visuals of the decent, the door and what lay beyond were awesome but the banter thrown in was priceless. LOVED IT!

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
    Thanks so much, Hitch! I'm just finishing off the new chapter but it's a bit of a monster in length. I have to admit, the banter can be difficult to maintain but it's really the core of Radshaw's character. Thrilled you liked it, mate. Your reviews here got me going again after I got stuck a couple of days ago.

    Mike
Comment from Sasha
Excellent
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Sorry I took so long to get to this but I am way behind in my reviewing...no excuse, just behind. Great chapter. I enjoyed every one of your clever lines and even wrote a few down that I can use should I ever converse with my sister again. Great work with this one. I anxiously look forward to reading the next chapter.

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2013


reply by the author on 15-Aug-2013
    hehe, I have to admit, there's an element of devilish fun to writing Mike Radshaw's tales. You never have to apologise, my friend - especially when you follow it with such wonderful comments :-).

    Mike