Commentary and Philosophy
Viewing comments for Chapter 57 "They Grow Up!"My thoughts about t
16 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Very good example of this easily read form. And the message is certainly one worth repeating. We need to enjoy every moment with our kids while we can, for they do grow up and move on with separate lives.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Very good example of this easily read form. And the message is certainly one worth repeating. We need to enjoy every moment with our kids while we can, for they do grow up and move on with separate lives.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you Phyllis, they do grow up so fast.
Comment from Eigle Rull
A very well written poem my friend. And your thoughts are true, and important. It was an interesting piece of work. The flow seemed very good, making it easy to understand. I didn't find any mistakes at all. It held my attention very well. Thank you, I enjoyed reading it, it was excellent.
Always with respect,
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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A very well written poem my friend. And your thoughts are true, and important. It was an interesting piece of work. The flow seemed very good, making it easy to understand. I didn't find any mistakes at all. It held my attention very well. Thank you, I enjoyed reading it, it was excellent.
Always with respect,
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you Eigle. I appreciate your time and well thought comments.
Comment from alexgeorge
Lovely poem reminding us that the time we are alloted with our children is precious and fleeting. These little giants allow us to live with them and enjoy them whilst they are growing up, so it's a shame not to share ourselves with them, fish, play, read, love, cuddle, take trips with. Too soon they grow up and have to turn their attentions to spouse and children. So waste not the time alloted.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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Lovely poem reminding us that the time we are alloted with our children is precious and fleeting. These little giants allow us to live with them and enjoy them whilst they are growing up, so it's a shame not to share ourselves with them, fish, play, read, love, cuddle, take trips with. Too soon they grow up and have to turn their attentions to spouse and children. So waste not the time alloted.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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Thank you Alexgeorge. Yes, you have it exactly.
Comment from The Death
That repeating rhymes are carried out well.
The syllable count is also correct in each iine.
Though i don't like this format at all,nothing good about it,but your content of the write is always interesting.
"in their hearts dwell"
has four syllables.
"fond mem'ries compel"
it should be 'compell'
it is an excellent write.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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That repeating rhymes are carried out well.
The syllable count is also correct in each iine.
Though i don't like this format at all,nothing good about it,but your content of the write is always interesting.
"in their hearts dwell"
has four syllables.
"fond mem'ries compel"
it should be 'compell'
it is an excellent write.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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Thank you Anupam.
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I checked, and you are correct, I fixed those sprags. Thank you for pointing them out and helping me improve one of my poems. I appreciate it.
Comment from Lady Veloce
Excellent poem! The topic was one close to the heart, the message genuine. The stanzas are well built with the landmarks of childhood, a parent's devotion, and a universal truth. Great work!
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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Excellent poem! The topic was one close to the heart, the message genuine. The stanzas are well built with the landmarks of childhood, a parent's devotion, and a universal truth. Great work!
Comment Written 06-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013
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Thank you very much Lady Veloce.
Comment from Sararb
I loved this one. It is so important to share a lot of time with our children, because they do grow up so fast, and we can't recapture those times ever again. Great job with this one, It flowed smoothly. I enjoyed this format a lot. Gungalo is a great writer, and I love her poetry. Sara :)
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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I loved this one. It is so important to share a lot of time with our children, because they do grow up so fast, and we can't recapture those times ever again. Great job with this one, It flowed smoothly. I enjoyed this format a lot. Gungalo is a great writer, and I love her poetry. Sara :)
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank you Sara. Wowie! Another six, you have really blessed me with riches this morning. I am blown away.
Comment from Selina Stambi
I wish I could be as adventurous as you in trying out different - sometimes exotic! - formats.
I love the madcap pace of the poem - the format was perfect for the message.
They do grow up fast, don't they?
I have two 22 year olds - feels like they were infants just yesterday.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
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I wish I could be as adventurous as you in trying out different - sometimes exotic! - formats.
I love the madcap pace of the poem - the format was perfect for the message.
They do grow up fast, don't they?
I have two 22 year olds - feels like they were infants just yesterday.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
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Thanks Sonali. Yes, my baby girl just turned 38.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Trieschel,
This an excellent poem with an excellent message. You are a virtuoso when it comes to writing poems with different forms.
I enjoyed this poem.
Preston
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
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Hi, Trieschel,
This an excellent poem with an excellent message. You are a virtuoso when it comes to writing poems with different forms.
I enjoyed this poem.
Preston
Comment Written 24-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2013
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Thank you Preston. I appreciate the compliment.
Comment from sunnilicious
Third paragraph, third line... I think the 'a' should be an 'and'. Also, the last line of the poem seems awkward to when read as a whole verse. I'd modify from 'At a gallop' to 'And they gallop'.
Otherwise, it's a wonderful poem. Full of wisdom and sincerity. Excellent.
Have a blessed evening :)
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2013
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Third paragraph, third line... I think the 'a' should be an 'and'. Also, the last line of the poem seems awkward to when read as a whole verse. I'd modify from 'At a gallop' to 'And they gallop'.
Otherwise, it's a wonderful poem. Full of wisdom and sincerity. Excellent.
Have a blessed evening :)
Comment Written 22-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2013
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Thanks for the suggestions, sunnilicious, but I don't think so." Come sit a spell" is a colloquial term. The last line is intentionally a repeat of the first stanza. But I understand where you are coming from.
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Maybe you should note it. It's not a common term. Reading it seemed awkward due to unfamiliar terminology. Good work.
Comment from ravenblack
How true. It all goes at a gallop. Just took the kids to ihop ( used to always go when they were little for funny face pancakes) and we were talking about how weird it was 'cause it seemed like we were there yesterday.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2013
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How true. It all goes at a gallop. Just took the kids to ihop ( used to always go when they were little for funny face pancakes) and we were talking about how weird it was 'cause it seemed like we were there yesterday.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2013
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Thanks Ravenblack. It really does go so fast.
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Thanks Ravenblack. It really does go so fast.
