Don't suck!
Live expecting more.3 total reviews
Comment from Treischel
Life sucks if you suck,
too you all if you can too,
its best if you ducked.
A nicely done 5-7-5 formatted poem with a good message. The "duck" is a unexpected and humorous touch.
I thing the first "too" in the second line should be "to".
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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Life sucks if you suck,
too you all if you can too,
its best if you ducked.
A nicely done 5-7-5 formatted poem with a good message. The "duck" is a unexpected and humorous touch.
I thing the first "too" in the second line should be "to".
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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Thanks , i have edited it. thanks for the advice.
Please look out for me like this.
Comment from Indie Skreet
I think you mean 'to' you all rather than 'too'. I think I know what you are trying to say, but the second line does not make it clear enough.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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I think you mean 'to' you all rather than 'too'. I think I know what you are trying to say, but the second line does not make it clear enough.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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yes, it was a slip up.
I am new , please look out for me like this.
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Hi James, thank you for being so gracious. I only review pieces I like. If I hadn't seen any merit in this I would have simply passed it, but there is potential, so don't give up :) I have been known to rehash full poems in my book due to one valid point a reviewer has written. Best wishes to you, Indie
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Thanks Indie.....
i hope you will help me write more beautifully.
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Hi James, thank you for your gracious reply, but I am not the best one to teach - check out some of the great writer's on here, eg Closetpoetjester, Mrs Dark, ephraim crudd ....... oh I could go on. they know best :)
Comment from 9999pool
Life does sucks when we are sucked into a world of dismay and bad vibes.
If the road is too dark to get out, try to duck here and there, to get out of the rut.
Things will not get better if we felt sucked.
Good luck and remember to dug and hide it out until it is safe to come out of the mud!
Good humor. Well expressed.
Cheerio, Ritchie.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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Life does sucks when we are sucked into a world of dismay and bad vibes.
If the road is too dark to get out, try to duck here and there, to get out of the rut.
Things will not get better if we felt sucked.
Good luck and remember to dug and hide it out until it is safe to come out of the mud!
Good humor. Well expressed.
Cheerio, Ritchie.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2013
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thanks man.
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Welcome. Cheerio. Ritchie.
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Thanks a lot Pal for liking my writing..
