haiku (silken mist lingers)
5-7-5 haiku contest entry16 total reviews
Comment from Kiki12
Nice use of the sound of the letter 'L' throughout the poem. Very fluid and nice imagery. Very well done, thanks for sharing.
Kiki
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Nice use of the sound of the letter 'L' throughout the poem. Very fluid and nice imagery. Very well done, thanks for sharing.
Kiki
Comment Written 17-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2013
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Oh, thank you so much. Flow is diffecult in a haiku, so I do appreciate that you felt it flowed.
Comment from Righteous Riter
This piece meets the criteria of a 5-7-5. This piece is short, sweet, to the point and the message is clear. The words bring the photo to life as the passion of the writer is felt by the reader. Nice work.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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This piece meets the criteria of a 5-7-5. This piece is short, sweet, to the point and the message is clear. The words bring the photo to life as the passion of the writer is felt by the reader. Nice work.
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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This is such a lovely review, thank you so much
Comment from Earl of Oxford
This very much reminds me of a recent short post of mine which also included a reference to 'dew' and the phrase, 'silken mist'. I'll kid myself I inspired this haiku which is excellently put together and presented.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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This very much reminds me of a recent short post of mine which also included a reference to 'dew' and the phrase, 'silken mist'. I'll kid myself I inspired this haiku which is excellently put together and presented.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 16-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2013
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Thank you E of O, apparently great minds think alike. I don't believe I saw that haiku. This is a great review.
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LOL. Don't tell fibs, Val, as I originally plagiarised an old poem of yours for the content I mentioned, and then you stole it BACK again. Haha. xx
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Okay, now you've got me going. What's the name of the poem on your profile, so I can see it. And honestly, what self-respecting haikuist doesn't write about dew and mist? LOL
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LOL, Val. Of course you're right - there's only so many fancy phrases we can use.
Mine was entitled, 'tanka (in dawn's silken mist)' - about 6 posts ago in my portfolio, theough I haven't posted much lately. xx
Comment from elliejean
I love the picture. I love lilacs. Their smell is great. They smell the strongest when the air is filled with moisture.Dew makes the flower sparkle. Great work.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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I love the picture. I love lilacs. Their smell is great. They smell the strongest when the air is filled with moisture.Dew makes the flower sparkle. Great work.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thank you so much for this wonderful review
Comment from bard owl
You paint a lush picture with your words. Lilacs are one of my favorite flowers. Lingers languidly is such alliteration. Best of luck in the contest with this appealing entry.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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You paint a lush picture with your words. Lilacs are one of my favorite flowers. Lingers languidly is such alliteration. Best of luck in the contest with this appealing entry.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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YOu are too kind, thank you so much.
Comment from sgalletti
You got my vote! I was pleasantly surprised that there were several entries in this contest that moved beyond the required 5-7-5 syllable count to actually create a lovely haiku with flow, concrete imagery, a seasonal reference, a satori, and a sense of hai or fun. Some were even good despite not following the typical "rule" for titling the poem Haiku with the first line in parentheses. Kudos. Yours is one of which I speak! Sue
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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You got my vote! I was pleasantly surprised that there were several entries in this contest that moved beyond the required 5-7-5 syllable count to actually create a lovely haiku with flow, concrete imagery, a seasonal reference, a satori, and a sense of hai or fun. Some were even good despite not following the typical "rule" for titling the poem Haiku with the first line in parentheses. Kudos. Yours is one of which I speak! Sue
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thanks so much Sue for the great review and the vote. There were some fun ones in this contest.
Comment from EMB
It may be short and sweet, but this is a wonderfully vivid poem. I also liked the bit of alliteration you fed us, and of course, you did a great job with the format. :)
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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It may be short and sweet, but this is a wonderfully vivid poem. I also liked the bit of alliteration you fed us, and of course, you did a great job with the format. :)
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thank you, Edward
Comment from adewpearl
lovely presentation of your poem
beautiful consonance of L sounds in all three lines
good 5/7/5 structure
good assonance of short I sounds in your opening line
nice alliteration in lingers languidly
you create a truly beautiful scene with appeal to the sense of touch and smell as well as to the sense of sight
Brooke
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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lovely presentation of your poem
beautiful consonance of L sounds in all three lines
good 5/7/5 structure
good assonance of short I sounds in your opening line
nice alliteration in lingers languidly
you create a truly beautiful scene with appeal to the sense of touch and smell as well as to the sense of sight
Brooke
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thank you Brooke
Comment from Bill Schott
This is a simple glimpse of the natural day's beginning. The dew going through a transition of heat as it still rests heavily on the lilacs. Nice scene.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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This is a simple glimpse of the natural day's beginning. The dew going through a transition of heat as it still rests heavily on the lilacs. Nice scene.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thank you for the lovely review
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This haiku has pretty concrete imagery throughout, and it is beautifully presented. Nice alliteration that is not over-done. Form and syllable count are correct according to the rules of the contest. Good luck, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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This haiku has pretty concrete imagery throughout, and it is beautifully presented. Nice alliteration that is not over-done. Form and syllable count are correct according to the rules of the contest. Good luck, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 14-Feb-2013
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2013
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Thank you, Jeanie