After The Picnic
A boy remembers summer116 total reviews
Comment from GregoryCody
I haven't read this style from you! WOW. Really great. It's poetic of course but inna unique way, almost like prose or a conversation. Great imagery and I love your choices of words.
Landslide leaving, whoa awesome couplet
Picnic slush inside
Fat uncle Ted
Some nice alliteration goes so far here
I also like how break things up.
This is a Really good piece man. Seriously.
reply by the author on 20-May-2019
  |
I haven't read this style from you! WOW. Really great. It's poetic of course but inna unique way, almost like prose or a conversation. Great imagery and I love your choices of words.
Landslide leaving, whoa awesome couplet
Picnic slush inside
Fat uncle Ted
Some nice alliteration goes so far here
I also like how break things up.
This is a Really good piece man. Seriously.
Comment Written 20-May-2019
reply by the author on 20-May-2019
-
Thanks so much, Greg. I appreciate thst. I don't know if you are aware that I was writing poetry nd short stories long before I wrote my Cleve novels. :) Bob
-
So cool. A many of so many skills. Seriously it's really good man. :)
-
My Spanish isn't too good but as they say in Spanish "grassssy asss ammigo.
LOL Bob
-
HAHAHAHAHA
-
How did I know you would like that, pardner? :) Bob
-
How did I know you would like that, pardner? :) Bob
-
Of course! :)
Comment from Willie P. Smith
This is excellent. It reminds me of the days of my youth, forties and fifties.
I was a farm boy and though we didn't have too many picnics, the families all got together for my grand parents birthdays. No beer, but food and other drinks flowed. Those were the days.
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
 |
This is excellent. It reminds me of the days of my youth, forties and fifties.
I was a farm boy and though we didn't have too many picnics, the families all got together for my grand parents birthdays. No beer, but food and other drinks flowed. Those were the days.
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
I'm so glad you can relate on some level, Willie. I appreciate your looking t this one. :) Bob
Comment from nancyjam
I love your reminiscing in this free verse. Wonderful
images that bring back memories of my summers in New Jersey -
Playing hide and seek after dark, while our parents and friends visited on the porch.
I enjoyed the details you shared, bringing it forward from the past.
Thanks for sharing, and thanks for the memories.
Nancy
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
|
I love your reminiscing in this free verse. Wonderful
images that bring back memories of my summers in New Jersey -
Playing hide and seek after dark, while our parents and friends visited on the porch.
I enjoyed the details you shared, bringing it forward from the past.
Thanks for sharing, and thanks for the memories.
Nancy
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
You are most assuredly welcome, dear Nancy. :) Bob
Ps. I am from Long Island. :)
-
My mother grew up on Long Island
-
Nassau or Suffolk county?
-
I don?t know.
-
Well, I am from Huntington in Suffolk county. No big deal, Nan. :) Bob
-
I just remembered she went to Port Washington High School. Found out it's in Nassau County
-
Ah yes Small world, Nancy Thanks. Bob
Comment from Patty Palmer
I enjoyed reading about a get together back like in the old days. The kids running around outside playing while the grown ups sat around talking and drinking. And the way it always ends Someone says or does something that makes every one sober up and they realize it's time to wrap it up for the night.
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
|
I enjoyed reading about a get together back like in the old days. The kids running around outside playing while the grown ups sat around talking and drinking. And the way it always ends Someone says or does something that makes every one sober up and they realize it's time to wrap it up for the night.
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
Thank you for this review, Patricia. Bob
Comment from kahpot
What a wonderful read, this would bring back memories for everyone and the knowing that this is probably now us, though the young ones would probably be playing some electronic inside game (unfortunately), yeah for the outside days, very well done****kahpot
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
|
What a wonderful read, this would bring back memories for everyone and the knowing that this is probably now us, though the young ones would probably be playing some electronic inside game (unfortunately), yeah for the outside days, very well done****kahpot
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
Thanks so much, my friend. I am glad you enjoyed this poetry. :) Bob
Comment from tfawcus
A wonderful reminiscence here, Bob. I found it very easy to visualise the scene because of your straightforward writing style and eye for interesting detail. Much enjoyed.
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
|
A wonderful reminiscence here, Bob. I found it very easy to visualise the scene because of your straightforward writing style and eye for interesting detail. Much enjoyed.
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
Thanks so much, Tony. So glad you enjoyed this poem. Bob
Comment from Kamisah Karim
I really love your poem.Reminds me of old days, similar in many ways. Those were the days of absolute joy.When we younger and family gathered.Not so when we grow older.
The imagery is so realistic and comforting. People do start to talk after a few, may be only half can of beer and laugh louder. The children playing, the grandmother threatening them and finally, the situation after they left. So very realistic. laughing louder too.
The lines did not rhyme but have a very nice rhythm. Each line blends well with the next line in perfect hormony.Really lovely.Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
|
I really love your poem.Reminds me of old days, similar in many ways. Those were the days of absolute joy.When we younger and family gathered.Not so when we grow older.
The imagery is so realistic and comforting. People do start to talk after a few, may be only half can of beer and laugh louder. The children playing, the grandmother threatening them and finally, the situation after they left. So very realistic. laughing louder too.
The lines did not rhyme but have a very nice rhythm. Each line blends well with the next line in perfect hormony.Really lovely.Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 19-May-2019
reply by the author on 19-May-2019
-
Thank you so much, Kamisah. I really appreciate your wonderful review here. And a belated welcome to you aboard Fanstory. I believe you will like it here. Bless you. :) Bob
-
You are very welcome Bob.Yes, I am very happy to be in Fanstory.At least, there is a place for me rto send my writing to. Somebody will get to read it. I also received a message that you have decided to be my fan.I am very honoured Bob.Thank you very much.
-
You may reciprocate if you like, Kamisah. :) Blessings to you, Bob
-
Sure Bob.Will do that.
Comment from Lainee...
Hi Bob! It was so good to be drawn into your world again after all these years. Still painting pictures with your words and taking me back to my childhood with this story. Don't ever stop! Lainee
reply by the author on 18-May-2018
|
Hi Bob! It was so good to be drawn into your world again after all these years. Still painting pictures with your words and taking me back to my childhood with this story. Don't ever stop! Lainee
Comment Written 18-May-2018
reply by the author on 18-May-2018
-
Thanks so much, my long lost friend. I must confess, I forgot about you and your wonderful writing. Since we last crossed paths I have had two detective novels actually published (not self-published either..LOL) I was autographing copies here on FS and mailing them out. Now, I have a third novel that was picke dup by a publisher and will be released on Septembe 20th of this year. It's called "Falling Up The Stairs." My pen name is R. C. Hartson. It is so good to see you back. Please stay. Blessings X Bob (Thanks for the six stars.)
Comment from prettybluebirds
I don't know, I kind of like winter if it's not too rough. At least I don't have to mow the lawn for a few months. LOL We have a huge lawn and I'm not sure I can handle it this year with this miserable sciatic pain. The thought of sitting on the mower for an hour or so makes me cringe.
reply by the author on 02-May-2018
|
I don't know, I kind of like winter if it's not too rough. At least I don't have to mow the lawn for a few months. LOL We have a huge lawn and I'm not sure I can handle it this year with this miserable sciatic pain. The thought of sitting on the mower for an hour or so makes me cringe.
Comment Written 02-May-2018
reply by the author on 02-May-2018
-
Hi,April Thanks so much for the review and the six brilliant stars. You are a sweetheart, you.
Do what I do afterI finally gave up on doing the outside work. Hire a young and able young man or girl to do the mowing. I took an ad up to the local highschool and got good responses. :) Bob
Comment from Zinnia48
What a terrific story of childhood's summer. Your images were as vivid as photos. I also like that you incorporated other senses: sounds: smacking, bull frog sounds, sensations: sticky, in addition to the strong visuals. Thanks for sharing. Caroline
reply by the author on 02-May-2018
|
What a terrific story of childhood's summer. Your images were as vivid as photos. I also like that you incorporated other senses: sounds: smacking, bull frog sounds, sensations: sticky, in addition to the strong visuals. Thanks for sharing. Caroline
Comment Written 01-May-2018
reply by the author on 02-May-2018
-
Thank you, Caaroline. The six starsareso generous of you. Bless you.I am so glad to hear from you again. Hope you are well? Bob
-
Doing well--My dancing days are over (what dancing days?!), and I am seriously decompensated--but getting stronger! Glad to see you on board!
