Comment from trimple

Excellent

A very strong piece of poetry here dear Tom
You said that you are thinking of death alot lately!
Well know that you will have all the time in the world once it comes to sit and consider it, a bit like sleep. My mum used to say when we refused to get out of bed "You can sleep all you like when ya dead!" she would yell from the bottom of the stairs:)
Beautifully written, the clarity is crystal clear.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading
Kind regards Trimple

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thanks Trimple, that is true. You compassion reads through.

Comment from Joannforsberg

Excellent

I do. It is wonderful to discover old poems written many years ago. I have a few myself. Like the smile upon my face and the uplifting end. Blessings, JO

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thanks Jo, it's fun to look back

Comment from sunnilicious

Excellent

1963... That would mean you were a suicidal youth. Sorry to hear that. I hope life has treated you well. The poem echoes eeriness, but the last verse offers hopefulness and change. Good flow of rhythm and rhymes. Excellent work.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thanks Sunni. Not suicidal, just acting out behaviors with a death wish. Like hopping trains and canoing over waterfalls, and such.

Comment from atlas-manoftherain

Exceptional

Wow, I wondered if the last poem just got me wrapped up, but you ended up nailing it again on this one. I have to say that this poem was even better in the last (well, not better per se, but rather I liked it more). The reason was your ending again. What an odd notion that man purpose might be simply to die. Maybe we do just live to die, maybe that's it. But it's a comforting thought that we find a purpose (at the very least, for without purpose, what is there?) even if that purpose is simply death. Well done again my friend. Write on.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thank you again atlas. You didn't quite get it. What I meant was, once you die, if there is an afterlife, you'll find out. If not, then what you said applies.

reply by atlas-manoftherain on 01-Feb-2013

I see. Yeah I'm still glad my interpretation applies actually in that sense because it seems a more unique idea (albeit a bit cynical and bleak).

Comment from Robin Gilmor

Excellent

A very good message with a hint of wanting to rhyme in maybe a strong abcb
pattern; however, that's my take and I follow formal form. I like the presentation very much. I'm sure you'll turn it into a six. You always do.
Enjoyable. Robin :)

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thanks Robin. Back then I was just a kid, not too much into formal form.

Comment from Dacker

Excellent

It good to be still kicking around. A reflective poem that engages the reader. Your rhyme scheme fluctuates and I wondered if that was by intent? I enjoyed reading the poem. Thanks, Dan

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thanks Dan, yes

Comment from charlyann

Excellent

I really like the structure, feel, flow and rhyming of this....It's great..uh oh..more space to fill...so, how's the weather

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2013

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reply by the author on 01-Feb-2013

Thank Charlyann. It about zero degrees F.