Rabbit
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "To Laugh or Cry"A Boy's Story of the rural South
26 total reviews
Comment from dannyleonn
This is a wonderful chapter. Every sentence took me had me captivated. My husband's older brother was always playing tricks on him. Oh the joy when my husband got the best of him!
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2013
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This is a wonderful chapter. Every sentence took me had me captivated. My husband's older brother was always playing tricks on him. Oh the joy when my husband got the best of him!
Comment Written 22-Mar-2013
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2013
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Your husband would know. I love my brother now and don't see him as much as I'd like. There were times though ....
Comment from PoeticXscape
What a delightful little tale, I enjoyed the characters and the emotions you gave them. Good expressive wording too. Thank you for sharing and keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2013
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What a delightful little tale, I enjoyed the characters and the emotions you gave them. Good expressive wording too. Thank you for sharing and keep up the good work.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and the kind feedback. Both are appreciated. Bill
Comment from Karen Payton Holt
Another great chapter, last time I visited Rabbit, he shot a gun...this time the yellow jackets!
The homily was interwoven easily within the story, the crying wham hurt inside...but laughter too.
Great voice to your characters. Really enjoyed this.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Another great chapter, last time I visited Rabbit, he shot a gun...this time the yellow jackets!
The homily was interwoven easily within the story, the crying wham hurt inside...but laughter too.
Great voice to your characters. Really enjoyed this.
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thank you Karen - for all of it; reading, kind comments and rating. I appreciate them all. Warm regards, Bill
Comment from kcross11
Wonderful story. The short, clipped sentences at the beginning at first seemed fragmented, but then the story opened up and it was fine.
I really like how you have used speech to help me see your character. It's done very well, and I can't wait to read the other chapters. Congratulations on a work very well done!
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Wonderful story. The short, clipped sentences at the beginning at first seemed fragmented, but then the story opened up and it was fine.
I really like how you have used speech to help me see your character. It's done very well, and I can't wait to read the other chapters. Congratulations on a work very well done!
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and your comments. It's not my normal writing style as I'm trying pov a nine year old. Regards, Bill
Comment from Titanx9
This continues to be an engrossing story about Rabbit's and Virge's adventures or in this story, their misadventures. I loved the scene with Rabbit's brother John, that was a real hoot. Thanks for sharing this entertaining book!
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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This continues to be an engrossing story about Rabbit's and Virge's adventures or in this story, their misadventures. I loved the scene with Rabbit's brother John, that was a real hoot. Thanks for sharing this entertaining book!
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thank you so much for reading and your kind feedback! Bills
Comment from Dawn Munro
This is wonderful! I have one possible correction for you and one definite one. The possible one is questionable because you might have intended poor grammar for this narrative voice (of Rabbit, a kid) - "I should have known things were going too (well)." The other correction is simply the removal of a comma - "Out of the back seat(,) popped my..." < that comma is not needed. i love this story, and this chapter had all the warmth and charm of the first few. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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This is wonderful! I have one possible correction for you and one definite one. The possible one is questionable because you might have intended poor grammar for this narrative voice (of Rabbit, a kid) - "I should have known things were going too (well)." The other correction is simply the removal of a comma - "Out of the back seat(,) popped my..." < that comma is not needed. i love this story, and this chapter had all the warmth and charm of the first few. Nicely done.
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and your kind words. I'll circle back around for both of your spots. Warm regards, Bill
Comment from Writingfundimension
This was a total delight from beginning to end, Bill. You've got a real winner with this novel. The relationship between Rabbit and Virge is just priceless and makes me very happy. I think Rabbit's philosophy on crying makes great sense, and love that you included that in this chapter. An important clue to his character.
Warmest regards, Bev
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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This was a total delight from beginning to end, Bill. You've got a real winner with this novel. The relationship between Rabbit and Virge is just priceless and makes me very happy. I think Rabbit's philosophy on crying makes great sense, and love that you included that in this chapter. An important clue to his character.
Warmest regards, Bev
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Hi Bev - thanks for reading and the comments. The crying issue will return! Warm regards, Bill
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You're welcome, Bill. Have a good weekend. Bev
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is veryh well written, bill, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where rabbit and virge are attacked by yellow jackets and plan to fix up those yellow jackets for good but rabbit's brother thinks he has a better plan
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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this is veryh well written, bill, you did an excellent job writing this chapter where rabbit and virge are attacked by yellow jackets and plan to fix up those yellow jackets for good but rabbit's brother thinks he has a better plan
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and your kind feedback. Yes, my brother always thought he had a better plan. Warm regards, Bill
Comment from October21
Hi there! There are some truly great descriptions in this compelling and well written little story. It is very amusing and I came across no mistakes throughout the piece:-)
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Hi there! There are some truly great descriptions in this compelling and well written little story. It is very amusing and I came across no mistakes throughout the piece:-)
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and your kind and generous feedback! Bill
Comment from nomi338
This is my first reading of this material and may I just say that I found it to be delightful. Being a man nearly 70 years of age I find it gratifying to see that young fools always get it in the end when they try to outsmart elders. Do they not realize that we did nit get old by accident,surely we must have learned something during all our years here on earth? I very much look forward to reading the next installment.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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This is my first reading of this material and may I just say that I found it to be delightful. Being a man nearly 70 years of age I find it gratifying to see that young fools always get it in the end when they try to outsmart elders. Do they not realize that we did nit get old by accident,surely we must have learned something during all our years here on earth? I very much look forward to reading the next installment.
Comment Written 19-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2013
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Thanks for reading and the kind words. If you get a few minutes, circle back and at least read chapter one where the characters are introduced. Bill
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I certainly will. Thanks for the advice.
