Powder
A septolet on drug abuse10 total reviews
Comment from snemes
You did a great job on this! Your wick burns quickly just like mine. Excellent choice of words to get your point across. Nice flow and rhyme in this serious poem. The picture is sobering. All young people should see this. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
You did a great job on this! Your wick burns quickly just like mine. Excellent choice of words to get your point across. Nice flow and rhyme in this serious poem. The picture is sobering. All young people should see this. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
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Thanks much
Comment from Craigitar
Good poem, tough message. Well written, poignant and right to the heart. Picture is perfect accompaniment for poem. Good job and luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Good poem, tough message. Well written, poignant and right to the heart. Picture is perfect accompaniment for poem. Good job and luck with the contest.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Thanks Craig
Comment from missy98writer
Poet,
Your Septolet poem is extremely well written with superb imagery.
The art work is priceless you used.
You used very fine alliteration with the B words.
You used excellent rhyme of rock block & wick quick.
I enjoyed all 14 words:
Smoke the rock
Chop the block
Fine
Your wick
Burns Quickly
Just like
Mine
I'd recommend your Septolet poem with food for thought to other reviewers
Or smoke for brain rot.
I wish you good luck in the Septolet contest.
Please have a smoke free day.
Missy.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Poet,
Your Septolet poem is extremely well written with superb imagery.
The art work is priceless you used.
You used very fine alliteration with the B words.
You used excellent rhyme of rock block & wick quick.
I enjoyed all 14 words:
Smoke the rock
Chop the block
Fine
Your wick
Burns Quickly
Just like
Mine
I'd recommend your Septolet poem with food for thought to other reviewers
Or smoke for brain rot.
I wish you good luck in the Septolet contest.
Please have a smoke free day.
Missy.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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LOL thanks Missy
Comment from Benjamin Valencia
Hello. Nicely crafted together. Good symmetry and good moral message built in. I liked your picture too for added resolution on capturing the full message. Wick I believe is being used in two contexts. Wick as in the cigarrette/light and the body. Great job and cheers.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Hello. Nicely crafted together. Good symmetry and good moral message built in. I liked your picture too for added resolution on capturing the full message. Wick I believe is being used in two contexts. Wick as in the cigarrette/light and the body. Great job and cheers.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Cheers mate
Comment from Galactia
Smoke the rock
Chop the block
Fine
Your wick
Burns Quickly
Just like
Mine
This septolet poem has perfect 14 words, reflecting drugs and the short life span we have.
GL in the contest
Regards
Tia
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Smoke the rock
Chop the block
Fine
Your wick
Burns Quickly
Just like
Mine
This septolet poem has perfect 14 words, reflecting drugs and the short life span we have.
GL in the contest
Regards
Tia
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Thanks Much Tia
Comment from prayingpoet
Scary but a sad truth you have captured in this short piece. Not just jail time, but emotional time as well. Good luck with the contest!
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Scary but a sad truth you have captured in this short piece. Not just jail time, but emotional time as well. Good luck with the contest!
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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thanks much Janice
Comment from LenSive
Yeoh! this is scary. I don't know exactly what these drug terms mean, but I get the overall impression thanks to the v graphic pictures. If only we could substitute the drug of cretivity, of learning, of slef-giving, how wonderful that would be!
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Yeoh! this is scary. I don't know exactly what these drug terms mean, but I get the overall impression thanks to the v graphic pictures. If only we could substitute the drug of cretivity, of learning, of slef-giving, how wonderful that would be!
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Thanks much Len
Comment from EMB
So true. Especially when you're burning it on both ends like these people choose to do. The picture isn't needed. It's an unnecessary crutch. Your words tell it all.
Nicely done.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
So true. Especially when you're burning it on both ends like these people choose to do. The picture isn't needed. It's an unnecessary crutch. Your words tell it all.
Nicely done.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Thanks Much Edward
Comment from 4tulips
I understood your attempt in writing a Septolet while you told of the powdery drug of cocaine. I wasn't expecting the picture you chose to go with the poem. The picture brings a different connotation to the words of powder (snow)& perhaps the falling down image due to smoking it. It is my opinion that perhaps another picture would have benefited for your poem. My suggestion only.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
I understood your attempt in writing a Septolet while you told of the powdery drug of cocaine. I wasn't expecting the picture you chose to go with the poem. The picture brings a different connotation to the words of powder (snow)& perhaps the falling down image due to smoking it. It is my opinion that perhaps another picture would have benefited for your poem. My suggestion only.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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alright...
Comment from phill doran
Hello there
Very good this - limited form and yet you do get the message over.
The idea of rhyming fine and time also makes it easier to read and engage: I could only suggest that in the second set you consider maybe dropping "due" and starting with "the" powder;
"...The powder
sucks you
dry in
time..."
This might run better? Just a thought, nothing special
I wish you well with this
cheers
phill
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
Hello there
Very good this - limited form and yet you do get the message over.
The idea of rhyming fine and time also makes it easier to read and engage: I could only suggest that in the second set you consider maybe dropping "due" and starting with "the" powder;
"...The powder
sucks you
dry in
time..."
This might run better? Just a thought, nothing special
I wish you well with this
cheers
phill
Comment Written 05-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2012
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Good idea