Comment from Alexmi1984

Excellent

I had tears on my face when I read your poem. I had emotions in my mind as I was preparing my review for this lovely poem. I said lovely and that is despite the sadness, the darkness of the topic.

I loved it!!
Alex :)

 Comment Written 28-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 29-Sep-2012

Thank you Alex for your lovely appraisal. Means a lot. :) Jaq x

Comment from MAMONIA

Excellent

How heartbreaking is this!! You did an
excellent job with this prompt. You told
the whole story in so few words. What more
can you say?
This is definitely a fabulous entry.
Lots of luck in the contest.
Marie

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 14-Sep-2012

Thank you so much Marie, your appraisal is very much appreciated.

Comment from Goose66

Good

Wow this is really heartfelt and you have managed to tell a tale in such a short poem. Rich with real feeling with hurt. Great work!

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 14-Sep-2012

Thank you so much for your kind review Goose.

Comment from Alexandra Laine

Good

You had me up to the last word. I felt the heartbreak but the flow of the very last word stumped me. Very well done though.

 Comment Written 14-Sep-2012

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reply by the author on 14-Sep-2012

Thanks Alexandra, I've changed it slightly. Hope it flows better now.