Comment from Tonulak

Excellent

Dear dallas Alice, this was an excellent poem describing the storm's gather kenetic energy. My only suggestion is that you used "its" a singular possessive where you refered to clouds, so I think it should be "their". Otherwise, a really fine free verse--Ted

 Comment Written 05-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 05-Aug-2012

Thanks, Ted. I corrected, thanks for the keen observation.
Dallas Alice (ha ha)

Comment from Meta~Mark

Excellent

beseeching the brewing storm - love the B words here ..

altered acerbic atmosphere. great alliteration in the A theme..

rain rain come today :) excellent

 Comment Written 04-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012

Thank you for the great review.

reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012

Thank you for the great review.

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

I could hear, feel and see the scene. I particularly was taken by your "thermal tarpaulins" image and their personification. Your use of alliteration adds to the intensity as well. Scary! -Joan

 Comment Written 04-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 04-Aug-2012

Thanks . Did you see the moon tonight? The 31st is the Blue Moon. Two full moons this month.

reply by Joan E. on 04-Aug-2012

Unfortunately, no--we had fog on the coast. I heard about the two full moons--maybe tonight will be better. -J

Comment from Starlit Ink

Excellent

"Thunderclouds loomed low, hovering their black bulk"
I liked those lines which were dramatic and have great imagery and alliteration. I like it when a poem takes the reader right to the scene like this one. The dramatic picture and coloring enhanced it also.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thanks for the great review.

Comment from Mai Mai

Excellent

I found this to be an interesting piece. While I felt the storm could have had a metaphorical sense to it, it was still very enjoyable. The storm is well defined and I believe this is a nice piece. Good luck.

Mai Mai

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you for the kind review.

Comment from Janice Canerdy

Excellent

Your well-written poem vividly describes the atmosphere of threat and anticipation when the earth would be glad to withstand a storm to get some rain. Very good

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you for the kind review. That was what I was shooting for, the dichotomy.

Comment from amused muse

Excellent

I like the flow of the writing and the imagery presented in the theme. The reader can actually feel and experience the storm. Nice job and thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you for reviewing and welcome to fanstory.

reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you for reviewing and welcome to fanstory.

Comment from ScarletClearwater

Excellent

Nice job as you threw some alliteration in there. Great job with this piece. It was very vivid and Lovely in imagery. Nice work!

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you

Comment from artemis53

Excellent

Great piece, Dallas and I love the color and artwork. My favorite verse is the last for the rivers waiting to be filled again.

 Comment Written 03-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thanks for reviewing.

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Magnificent imagery evoked by the use of beautiful, powerful language here - e.g.'s L loved - 'shrill keening', 'wended its way', 'beleaguered valley below', 'denude of energy', 'beseeching' - (gosh, do you think I liked it? LOL) Stunning free-verse, great presentation!

 Comment Written 02-Aug-2012

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reply by the author on 03-Aug-2012

Thank you so much for the great detailed review. Appreciate it.