The Eden Tree
Viewing comments for Chapter 32 "A Night in Tel Aviv"A family's need of a miracle is in a Box
2 total reviews
Comment from TammyGail
Great work on this chapter vigournet
it was well written and expressed
interesting keeping my att throughout
thanks for sharing always a pleasure
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2012
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Great work on this chapter vigournet
it was well written and expressed
interesting keeping my att throughout
thanks for sharing always a pleasure
Comment Written 29-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2012
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Thanks for your comments. Your words encourage me!
Comment from bowls
You've done a good job here showing the significance of this meeting and the high level at which it's held by the intense security measures. There's an added aspect to Sean's personality added, too. All along he's seemed so focused and almost perfect in his professional ways. Now there's a hint of something else in his background. The reader wonders: Will this be a problem? Nice touch of humour at the end. Just one little thing bothered me. I think you write with an excellent prose style and I noted your emphasis on colour in your description of both the woman and the waiting room but the sentence beginning, "The room had glossy..." troubled me. "Had" is such a weak verb the whole sentence seemed to fall flat. Apart from that, everything looked great.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2012
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You've done a good job here showing the significance of this meeting and the high level at which it's held by the intense security measures. There's an added aspect to Sean's personality added, too. All along he's seemed so focused and almost perfect in his professional ways. Now there's a hint of something else in his background. The reader wonders: Will this be a problem? Nice touch of humour at the end. Just one little thing bothered me. I think you write with an excellent prose style and I noted your emphasis on colour in your description of both the woman and the waiting room but the sentence beginning, "The room had glossy..." troubled me. "Had" is such a weak verb the whole sentence seemed to fall flat. Apart from that, everything looked great.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2012
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Thanks for your great review. I will look at that sentence.